Latest / Armstrong & Getty One More Thing / I Enjoy Dry/Nickels & Dimes

Transcript

I Enjoy Dry/Nickels & Dimes · Armstrong & Getty One More Thing

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: I do enjoy it dry, and this is dry.
• 0:03
  Speaker 2: It's one more.
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: Thing I'm strong drive, but it's also very very wet.
• 0:11
  Speaker 1: It's restrained.
• 0:12
  Speaker 2: Get broad before we get to this thing we came
• 0:16
  Speaker 2: across on the Twitter machine. Have you noticed this ad?
• 0:19
  Speaker 2: I saw it playing during FC and NFC Championship game.
• 0:23
  Speaker 2: I assume it's going to be on the Super Bowl.
• 0:26
  Speaker 2: Whoever's behind buying TikTok ads has got to be evil,
• 0:29
  Speaker 2: don't they? I mean, is it the Chinese Communist Party
• 0:31
  Speaker 2: buying TikTok ads?
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah?
• 0:34
  Speaker 2: During essentially, yeah, during our most watched TV shows in America?
• 0:39
  Speaker 2: Have you seen the nun talk ad? Very clever? The
• 0:42
  Speaker 2: Chinese are clever man. So while TikTok's getting beaten up
• 0:47
  Speaker 2: for being woke and kids with their dancing and their
• 0:50
  Speaker 2: sex and their drugs and blah blah blah, the people
• 0:54
  Speaker 2: behind TikTok, which again have to be in league with
• 0:58
  Speaker 2: the communist cheesy Chinese Party, think they got a nun
• 1:02
  Speaker 2: on there talking about how she's been spreading the word
• 1:04
  Speaker 2: about Jesus and the importance of going into the convent
• 1:06
  Speaker 2: and people call it none talk and she's never had
• 1:09
  Speaker 2: more success and makes it to try to get people.
• 1:11
  Speaker 2: I guess like my parents think, Oh I kind of
• 1:13
  Speaker 2: heard about TikTok, but it sounds kind of nice.
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: Oh.
• 1:16
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: They have a series of those ads, including a cancer doctor.
• 1:19
  Speaker 1: We've used TikTok to help people recognize the early signs
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: of cancer so we can save their lives.
• 1:26
  Speaker 3: Oh.
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: By the way, also on TikTok, where doctrinating your children
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: to hate America?
• 1:33
  Speaker 4: Yeah, on the flip side of that ad, they should
• 1:35
  Speaker 4: ask how many people have actually seen those particular accounts
• 1:38
  Speaker 4: come across their algorithm, because I guarantee you, unless you
• 1:41
  Speaker 4: look for them, they don't just pop up.
• 1:43
  Speaker 2: Yeah, unless you're seeking out nuns preaching the gospel, you're
• 1:46
  Speaker 2: probably going to get some sort of anti Israel Uh
• 1:51
  Speaker 2: have sex with me, booty call sort of TikTok going.
• 1:55
  Speaker 4: I go on TikTok all the time. I don't look
• 1:57
  Speaker 4: for that stuff and it just pops up in my algorithm.
• 2:00
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 2:01
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's pretty clever though, by the TikTok people to
• 2:06
  Speaker 2: during these really highly watched football games for people out
• 2:09
  Speaker 2: there aren't kind of where this is what's on TikTok?
• 2:12
  Speaker 2: Nuns spreading the gospel?
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: What are you against saving people? From the ravages of cancer. Wow,
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: weird TikTok.
• 2:20
  Speaker 2: That is disturbing.
• 2:22
  Speaker 1: So some news from rural America, then some humor. The
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: news is this radio station owner sent his landscape crew
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: out to clear his tower site, two hundred foot radio tower.
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: This is in rural Alabama. And the landscaping crew got
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: there and said, hey, what happened to the tower? Tower's gone.
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: Some crew of thieves came in stole all of the
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: transmitting equipment and the two hundred foot steel radio tower,
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: and now the owner and the coppers are trying to
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: figure out, Uh, who did this and how.
• 2:59
  Speaker 2: Now that reminds me. I've told this story many times.
• 3:02
  Speaker 2: My first boss, who was a nut, my first radio job,
• 3:08
  Speaker 2: Buck Rogers. I don't know if he's still alive or
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: where he is now. Uh had the voice of God. Anyway,
• 3:14
  Speaker 2: he hired me and then gives me this speech. Look, Jack,
• 3:19
  Speaker 2: let me just tell you this. Don't Nickolan die me,
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: don't steal from me. Don't nicklan dimy you steal the transmitter.
• 3:26
  Speaker 2: I'll applaud, but don't Nicklin die me. Okay, oh my god,
• 3:34
  Speaker 2: I've run into guys like that. Got to be the
• 3:37
  Speaker 2: hard ass.
• 3:40
  Speaker 1: Got to be the tough guy, all right, I wasn't transmitter.
• 3:44
  Speaker 2: I'll applaud what, but don't nickolan, dimy. You're paying me
• 3:51
  Speaker 2: six hundred dollars a month if I don't steal toner
• 3:53
  Speaker 2: from the copy machine or something. I don't think I'm
• 3:55
  Speaker 2: gonna be able to eat.
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: That's beautiful. So the radio station owner wants the thieves
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: to know this is a federal offence. You can go
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: to jail for a very long time, so quit stealing
• 4:06
  Speaker 1: my tower. It is difficult to imagine how that. Yeah,
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: they cut the wires that you know, you've all seen
• 4:14
  Speaker 1: the what do they call them guy wires whatever, and
• 4:17
  Speaker 1: dismantled and stole a two hundred foot tower. How long
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: would that take? And how long were they off the air?
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: It had to be like an automated radio station, all right,
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: where it's all syndicated programming whatever, and right.
• 4:31
  Speaker 4: I'm wondering how long it had been since anyone had
• 4:34
  Speaker 4: been up there to notice that this thing was gone?
• 4:36
  Speaker 4: Or was this like a quick.
• 4:38
  Speaker 2: I don't know, this is bizarre.
• 4:40
  Speaker 1: How long did it take?
• 4:41
  Speaker 2: Here's my other good story about the tower at our
• 4:43
  Speaker 2: dinky little radio station. When I got hired and he said, look,
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: don't nickel and dime me. There was a light out
• 4:50
  Speaker 2: at the top of the tower, which this radio station
• 4:52
  Speaker 2: was out in the country where the transmitter and the tower,
• 4:54
  Speaker 2: where the tower was right next to like I could
• 4:57
  Speaker 2: see it out the window when I was broadcasting it
• 4:59
  Speaker 2: was it was right there anyway, So the light was
• 5:01
  Speaker 2: out at the top, and he hired this guy who's
• 5:04
  Speaker 2: his job was he would go to the top of
• 5:06
  Speaker 2: radio tires and replace the lights. Anyway, this Mexican guy
• 5:09
  Speaker 2: who didn't speak any any English, and I, because I'm
• 5:13
  Speaker 2: a degenerate alcoholic, he gets there on like a Friday,
• 5:17
  Speaker 2: and he's got nothing to do. I say, hey, you
• 5:18
  Speaker 2: want to go out drinking? And he understood that enough,
• 5:20
  Speaker 2: so we go out and get hammered drunk. I mean
• 5:22
  Speaker 2: just hammered drunk. I'd never met the guy in my life.
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: He passes out of my couch, throws up on the floor,
• 5:28
  Speaker 2: I mean, just out of his mind drunk. I think
• 5:31
  Speaker 2: I had to carry him from the car into the house. Anyway,
• 5:34
  Speaker 2: The next day that hungover, he strapped on the equipment
• 5:38
  Speaker 2: and went to the top of that tower, which looked crazy, dangerous.
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: Oh oh my gosh, not on my best day.
• 5:45
  Speaker 2: He couldn't even hardly walk, but he went up to
• 5:47
  Speaker 2: the top of that thing and replace the light bulb
• 5:49
  Speaker 2: and came back down.
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: Final note on this sort of thing charming stories from
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: our radio infant hood. My first gig, I had to
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: sign on the radio station in the morning. It was
• 5:59
  Speaker 1: a station that turns off at night, literally at whatever
• 6:03
  Speaker 1: time it was. You play the national anthem, then you
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: turn off the transmitter. Then it was my job to
• 6:07
  Speaker 1: turn it on in the morning. And so if I overslept,
• 6:10
  Speaker 1: whe or hungover for whatever reason, not only did my
• 6:14
  Speaker 1: boss know, and the entire audience know because I didn't
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: turn on the radio. Is the entire audience probably fingers
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: one hand. But I had to notify the federal government
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: that I slept. Geez had to go on the logs.
• 6:31
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 6:31
  Speaker 2: I worked at a couple of radio stations like that.
• 6:33
  Speaker 2: It was there was nothing on until I got there
• 6:35
  Speaker 2: and turned it on, and then I woked.
• 6:37
  Speaker 1: Like anybody gave a fly in f honestly, but they
• 6:40
  Speaker 1: would yell at you ins.
• 6:41
  Speaker 2: And then I worked at a sunrise sundown radio station,
• 6:43
  Speaker 2: so it would go on at sunrise, which changes daily,
• 6:46
  Speaker 2: and it would turn off at sundown. So in the
• 6:49
  Speaker 2: winter I got, I would turn off the radio station
• 6:51
  Speaker 2: at five point fifteen. In the summer, I wouldn't turn
• 6:53
  Speaker 2: off the radio station at late thirty. What a weird
• 6:56
  Speaker 2: way to do things. That was play the national anthem
• 7:00
  Speaker 2: there and turn the key and walk out the door.
• 7:04
  Speaker 2: Hey look, you steal the transmitter all applod wow like that?
• 7:08
  Speaker 1: What an ass?
• 7:10
  Speaker 2: So this next thing, I don't I didn't know anything
• 7:12
  Speaker 2: about this, and I enjoyed it more so. I don't
• 7:14
  Speaker 2: think it ought to have any setup, do you think?
• 7:16
  Speaker 2: So let's just do it. Here we go?
• 7:18
  Speaker 3: How long? You're just called nice?
• 7:19
  Speaker 1: Spa was ready for court tomorrow?
• 7:21
  Speaker 3: Say, oh yeah, I ain't going. See I've been spending
• 7:25
  Speaker 3: the last six months booby trapping my entire five hundred acres.
• 7:29
  Speaker 3: I got snake pitch rolling logs, bear traps, I got
• 7:32
  Speaker 3: some straight up Indiana Jones shit. I got a fucking
• 7:34
  Speaker 3: boulder that'll fall down when you open my front door.
• 7:36
  Speaker 3: I got about one hundred and twenty coyotes that I
• 7:39
  Speaker 3: trained to bite anything with their crew.
• 7:40
  Speaker 2: Cut in a fucking badge.
• 7:42
  Speaker 3: I flew an old Vietnamese man out here and he
• 7:44
  Speaker 3: helped me dig about twelve miles.
• 7:45
  Speaker 2: Worth of the underground tunnels.
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: I had four hundred and fifty cameras.
• 7:48
  Speaker 3: I've rigged the solar panels all around this motherfucker. I
• 7:51
  Speaker 3: got a Bengal tighter that locked in my bathroom. We
• 7:53
  Speaker 3: can fucking kill for report shop right now.
• 7:55
  Speaker 5: You know, it's surprisingly easy to teach a raccoon how
• 7:57
  Speaker 5: to loosen ugnuts and cut brake lines. I rather live
• 8:00
  Speaker 5: the rest of my life in the woods, living off
• 8:02
  Speaker 5: fucking wild ginsen creak water, and then go to fucking
• 8:04
  Speaker 5: jail one more time. I even try to bring no
• 8:06
  Speaker 5: helicopters down here, neither, Like.
• 8:08
  Speaker 3: I ain't got a whole fucking coop full of pigeons
• 8:10
  Speaker 3: with Sea four tied around your feets.
• 8:12
  Speaker 1: Got a bunch of PVCA.
• 8:13
  Speaker 3: Pop put with gunpowder and ball barons, and a bad
• 8:15
  Speaker 3: boone who's daily accurate with the nail gun. There you go.
• 8:20
  Speaker 1: That was my favorite part, the baboon.
• 8:26
  Speaker 2: He's got a whole bunch of pigeons with C four
• 8:28
  Speaker 2: tied to their feets. Their feats, I ain't going to jail.
• 8:38
  Speaker 2: That's the sort of thing you get on TikTok that
• 8:40
  Speaker 2: and nuns telling you how to find.
• 8:43
  Speaker 1: Jesus, communist, and doctrination. Those three things.
• 8:51
  Speaker 2: Don't nickel and dime. He guys, well, I guess that's it.