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5-MINUTE FRIDAY: It's Only Heavy Because You Decide To Carry It · Hurdle with Emily Abbate

• 0:19
  Speaker 1: Hey everyone, Emily A Baddie here. You are listening to
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: five Minute Friday from Hurdle. I'm exhal I'm sitting in
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: a my best friend's living room in Rhode Island. I
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: came up here midweek because about a month ago today
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  Speaker 1: she had her third baby. Saying that out loud is
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  Speaker 1: just absolutely I still I can't believe it's real. But
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  Speaker 1: I came to meet her. Her name is Bella, and
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  Speaker 1: she is absolutely beautiful. And I have been thinking of
• 1:00
  Speaker 1: about I guess where I am in my life and
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  Speaker 1: something that has helped me on my journey of really
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  Speaker 1: trusting the process when it comes to the things that
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  Speaker 1: I know that I want. I have adopted this mindset
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  Speaker 1: that what is meant to happen in my life will happen.
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  Speaker 1: And that doesn't mean that I can take an entirely
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  Speaker 1: you know, by stand or approach. It still requires me
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  Speaker 1: to put in effort. But for so long I was
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  Speaker 1: frustrated about things that I wasn't doing anything about. And
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  Speaker 1: if I'm being transparent, a lot of that had to
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  Speaker 1: do with the fact that I was choosing and have
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  Speaker 1: been choosing to focus most of my energy on my
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  Speaker 1: work and my way of being and my friendships and
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  Speaker 1: the relationships that really fill me up. And I had this,
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  Speaker 1: as we call in life coaching, this grumlin on my
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  Speaker 1: shoulder that basically told me that investing my time and
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  Speaker 1: trying to meet someone i e. A romantic partner was
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  Speaker 1: almost a waste because I didn't need to feel as
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  Speaker 1: though I wasn't good enough, and that oftentimes in the
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  Speaker 1: dating pool that can happen. I recognize now that I
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  Speaker 1: am control of how I feel, and someone may do
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  Speaker 1: something or act in some kind of way, but then
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  Speaker 1: I am responsible for what happens after that. It brings
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  Speaker 1: me to this idea of heaviness. And something is only
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  Speaker 1: heavy because we make the conscious decision over and over
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  Speaker 1: again to carry it. I'll say that again, something can
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  Speaker 1: be heavy because we make the conscious decision over and
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  Speaker 1: over to carry it. But what happens I pose this
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  Speaker 1: question when we embrace change, when you allow yourself to
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  Speaker 1: walk a new path, author loosen up your sense of identity.
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  Speaker 1: What happens when you, instead of ignoring what your inner
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  Speaker 1: voice is saying, you embrace what is and decide to
• 3:14
  Speaker 1: move forward. I feel like I'm kind of talking in
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  Speaker 1: circles here, But what I'm trying to say is that
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  Speaker 1: we have the choice on how we want to move
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  Speaker 1: forward each and every day, and for me, my choice
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  Speaker 1: for a long time has been I am moving forward
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  Speaker 1: focusing on certain things, and those things have nothing to
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  Speaker 1: do with dating or starting a family, or I mean,
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  Speaker 1: I guess those are the two things that we're talking
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  Speaker 1: about in this moment as I sit here in my
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  Speaker 1: best friend's house that she shares with her husband and
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  Speaker 1: her three beautiful children. I made that conscious decision because
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  Speaker 1: it was what was best for me, and now I'm
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  Speaker 1: shifting into a space where that might not be true.
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  Speaker 1: I might finally be ready to open myself up to
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  Speaker 1: what something else might look like. And that's exciting, and
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  Speaker 1: I'm framing it that way. Before I was framing it
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  Speaker 1: and looking at it in a way that felt heavy
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  Speaker 1: because of my past experiences carrying the concept, the ideas,
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  Speaker 1: the thoughts, the notions of dating with me. It felt
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  Speaker 1: like a burden, and it doesn't have to. It can
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  Speaker 1: be exciting. It can be something to look forward to
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  Speaker 1: if I let go of the misfortunes that have happened
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  Speaker 1: in my past and simply look forward to what there is,
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  Speaker 1: what can be, what I bring to the table knowing
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  Speaker 1: that I choose whether or not I want to move
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  Speaker 1: forward with an individual. No more you make me feel
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  Speaker 1: this way, no more pointing the finger. Instead, I choose
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  Speaker 1: to move forward with light. I choose. I'm like smiling
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  Speaker 1: thinking about this because I I think maybe it's not because,
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  Speaker 1: but I believe that I'm smiling finally, because I'm at
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  Speaker 1: this point where I am ready and to anyone else
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  Speaker 1: who is listening to this, as I rambled into this
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  Speaker 1: microphone and talk to you about where I'm at and
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  Speaker 1: all of my thoughts, which is what I do on
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  Speaker 1: five Minute Friday, I encourage you to listen to your
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  Speaker 1: inner voice, not to make decisions because you feel as
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  Speaker 1: though you should be doing one thing or another. But
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  Speaker 1: rather than shoulding on yourself, listen and move forward with
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  Speaker 1: your own intentions, with what you want, because that when
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  Speaker 1: you move forward with what you want, that is when
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  Speaker 1: the universe shows up for you. That is when you
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  Speaker 1: attract what you are putting in to the world. And
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  Speaker 1: that's a good way to be My prompt for you
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  Speaker 1: this week. What are you caring with you that maybe
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  Speaker 1: it's time to let go of what false assumption or
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  Speaker 1: narrative are you carrying with you that maybe it is
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  Speaker 1: time to let go of? And now a listener question.
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  Speaker 2: Hi Emily calling in from San Diego. Hope you're having
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  Speaker 2: a great day. I wanted to see if you have
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  Speaker 2: any suggestions or tips for someone who wants to get
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  Speaker 2: into cycling. I'm a longtime runner and have a chronic
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  Speaker 2: knee injury unfortunately now, so I am unable to keep
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  Speaker 2: running like I used to, and I'm really looking for
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  Speaker 2: a new active hobby that can keep me moving and
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  Speaker 2: kind of fill the void in terms of that in
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  Speaker 2: dwarphin Rush. But I am super duper beginner when it
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  Speaker 2: comes to biking. It looks like something I would really enjoy,
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  Speaker 2: but kind of scared to get started and not really
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  Speaker 2: sure where to get started. So any tips you have
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  Speaker 2: would be amazing. And yeah, thank you for everything that
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  Speaker 2: you do. Really appreciate you.
• 7:03
  Speaker 1: Hey, hey cycling, We love cycling. You are living in
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  Speaker 1: San Diego, so the weather is a little bit nicer
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  Speaker 1: year round than it is where I am. But for
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  Speaker 1: this specifically, I will offer two pieces of advice. The
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  Speaker 1: first thing is don't judge your beginning too harshly. Just
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  Speaker 1: like picking up any new activity. It can be a
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  Speaker 1: little bit overwhelming and there will be a little bit
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  Speaker 1: of a learning curve. With that said, do not fret.
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  Speaker 1: There are plenty of really great cyclists that you can
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  Speaker 1: follow on social media for inspiration and also for tips
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  Speaker 1: and tricks on how to get into the swing of things.
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  Speaker 1: I'm going to link an episode from Not All That
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  Speaker 1: Long Ago in the show notes that answers a bunch
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  Speaker 1: of beginner cycling questions. When you start out, I would
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  Speaker 1: recommend getting an entry level bike, and by entry level
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  Speaker 1: I mean something that's not all that expensive, so you
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  Speaker 1: can make sure that this is something that you really
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  Speaker 1: want to pursue. My friends at Priority sell really affordable bikes,
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  Speaker 1: and the best part about their bikes is that they
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  Speaker 1: come equipped with a belt drive, which is different than
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  Speaker 1: what you might find on a traditional road bike in
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  Speaker 1: that it requires a lot less maintenance and is really
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  Speaker 1: user friendly. So not only will I link that episode
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  Speaker 1: on beginner cycling tips in the show notes, but I'm
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  Speaker 1: also going to toss in a link to Priorities website. Additionally,
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  Speaker 1: when it comes to cycling, you can also bring your
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  Speaker 1: road bike indoors by putting it on a trainer. This
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  Speaker 1: is a really great option for someone who wants to
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  Speaker 1: have a road bike, may not be able to use
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  Speaker 1: it in the cooler months, but wants to get their
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  Speaker 1: cycling on inside and then this way they don't need
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  Speaker 1: to invest in both a road bike and an indoor
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  Speaker 1: spin bike, whether that be a peloton or maybe a
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  Speaker 1: more affordable option. The last thing I'll say here is
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  Speaker 1: just like within the running community, the cycling community is
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  Speaker 1: absolutely awesome, and there are so many people that are
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  Speaker 1: getting on the bike and getting out there on the
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  Speaker 1: regular that can help you with routes and also just
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  Speaker 1: having friends to go out with. I know that writing
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  Speaker 1: can be something that you definitely don't want to do
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  Speaker 1: by yourself, especially if you don't know an area very well,
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  Speaker 1: So make sure to check out your local community, whether
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  Speaker 1: that's taking through Facebook, looking on Instagram. If you happen
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  Speaker 1: to live near a Rafa Cycling, they host group rides
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  Speaker 1: out of their brand stores very often. So yeah, I
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  Speaker 1: think That's where I'd begin. But again, be gentle on yourself.
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  Speaker 1: Starting something new can be overwhelming, so be proud of
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  Speaker 1: yourself for getting in the position to start. Trust me,
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  Speaker 1: I know you won't regret it. With that, make sure
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: you're falling along with hurdle over on social It's at
• 9:44
  Speaker 1: Hurdle Podcast. I'm over at Emily a Body, another hurdle conquered.
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  Speaker 1: Catch you guys next time.