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Divorce Laws · Let's Ask the Mamas!

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  Speaker 1: We got a question for American mama's. Dear mama's, do
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  Speaker 1: you think divorce laws in most states hurt the dad
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  Speaker 1: or the mom more? Well, let's ask our American mama's mama.
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  Speaker 2: Mama, she said, and joining us now our American mama's
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  Speaker 2: ternin Ediville and Kimberly Burlison, I have a friend who
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  Speaker 2: has gone through a Nashy divorce.
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  Speaker 1: He's got two young daughters in the state of Texas,
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  Speaker 1: and he has said, Look, the laws in the state
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  Speaker 1: of Texas are absolutely biased against dads and it makes
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  Speaker 1: things harder for dads. Have you guys seen that. Have
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  Speaker 1: you seen some states that make it harder for moms,
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  Speaker 1: some states that make it harder for dads. What have
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  Speaker 1: y'all seen.
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  Speaker 3: From our own personal experience, Because we have a family
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  Speaker 3: member who has gone through this and he is the dad,
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  Speaker 3: and we have seen where his rights have basically been
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  Speaker 3: stripped from him because of the manipulation that we feel
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  Speaker 3: is the wife. And I'm all about if there is abuse,
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  Speaker 3: if there are things like that happening, that's it's a
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  Speaker 3: whole other category. But we're talking about a man and
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  Speaker 3: woman that no longer want to be married. And then
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  Speaker 3: the tools the female will use in order to get
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  Speaker 3: the children but also get the finances that she wants.
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  Speaker 3: And so we have watched this firsthand, and it's very frustrating.
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  Speaker 3: It's very frustrating to watch this man go through what
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  Speaker 3: he's gone through, basically lost his kids. And this girl,
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  Speaker 3: I don't want to like cheryld, but she has a
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  Speaker 3: history of mental illness, of accusations towards many many people, coworkers, babysitters,
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  Speaker 3: the husband before her. So there's a history, there's a pattern.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's similar to what my friend's going.
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  Speaker 3: It's like, well, this should have been taken into account
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  Speaker 3: when the custody was taken place, but it's not. Because
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  Speaker 3: I think so many people are afraid to say no
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  Speaker 3: to the mom. I think they're basically afraid to give
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  Speaker 3: everything over to the to the dad.
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  Speaker 1: Right.
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  Speaker 4: Also, I think that the dads just sometimes give up
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  Speaker 4: the money part of going to the courthouse and having
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  Speaker 4: a lawyer and the lieser's fewed and all of that.
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  Speaker 4: But we've all we've long said you have to love
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  Speaker 4: your children more than you hate your spouse or hate
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  Speaker 4: your ex spouse. Right, And what's happening in Kentucky they're
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  Speaker 4: doing this thing where I think it's going to help
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  Speaker 4: a lot. I think already studies have shown that it has.
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  Speaker 4: But okay, Kentucky's divorce rate fell roughly twenty five percent
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  Speaker 4: from twenty sixteen to twenty twenty three after a twenty
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  Speaker 4: eighteen law made fifty to fifty shared custody the defaults.
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  Speaker 4: So in essence, you take the woman takes care of
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  Speaker 4: fifty percent of the child and get gone, yeah off, yes,
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  Speaker 4: and the financial part of it okay, and unless they
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  Speaker 4: said unless there's abuse. If there's abuse, then that's a
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  Speaker 4: whole different ballgame. But if everything is fair, So really,
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  Speaker 4: if you want to say this would harm the stay
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  Speaker 4: at home moms, you know the when it comes to finances,
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  Speaker 4: but what it might do is encourage you to try
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  Speaker 4: to work it out with your spouse and stay married
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  Speaker 4: because a lot of us, I can speak for myself,
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  Speaker 4: people like Kevin and me, who have gone through some
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  Speaker 4: rough spots and you think about that, like, oh my gosh,
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  Speaker 4: life might just be easier if we were just and
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  Speaker 4: then you stick with it because you're both stubborn. You
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  Speaker 4: don't want to break up your family. You get over
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  Speaker 4: that hump and you're you know, you're like, oh my god,
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  Speaker 4: we would have lost so much. You know, you're so
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  Speaker 4: in love and you just think, oh my gosh, why
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  Speaker 4: did we even think that that was even on the table, right,
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  Speaker 4: And so this might deter couples from actually going through
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  Speaker 4: with a.
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  Speaker 1: Divorce because it's fifty fifty customers, yes, yeah, and fifty finances.
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  Speaker 1: You're saying, right, well.
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  Speaker 3: There are so many couples are it's so easy to
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  Speaker 3: throw in the towel, and so I think this de
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  Speaker 3: tears that. And I think that's what they're doing in Kentucky.
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  Speaker 3: They're trying and we're not. This is take abuse out
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  Speaker 3: because that's all they wanted to talk about in the comments.
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  Speaker 3: Just look at a couple trying to make it. They
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  Speaker 3: don't get along and they want to separate. I think
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  Speaker 3: this keeps that from happening. This keeps you trying, because
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  Speaker 3: we know that once you get over the hurdle, you'll
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  Speaker 3: come back to each other and you'll be like, oh
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  Speaker 3: my gosh, Like Terry just said, we got through a
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  Speaker 3: rough patch. But a lot of people throw in the
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  Speaker 3: towel during the rough patch.
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  Speaker 4: And it just destroys the children in ways you can't
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  Speaker 4: know even when they are teenagers trying to go out
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  Speaker 4: with somebody or when they find their mate, and it
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  Speaker 4: just it changes who they are on the inside.
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  Speaker 1: Well, and a lot of times it makes it harder
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  Speaker 1: for them to trust when they start dating, right, yes, right,
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  Speaker 1: and in early twenties and thirties, I mean, it makes
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  Speaker 1: it harder for them to understand what's supposed to look.
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  Speaker 4: Like unless, like I said, and I know couples like this,
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  Speaker 4: you love your children more than you hate your ex, yes,
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  Speaker 4: and you can get along and both love each other
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  Speaker 4: enough to love your children, you know, take your other
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  Speaker 4: spouses go together. I've seen that and it works beautifully.
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  Speaker 4: But this fifty to fifty thing is something to think
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  Speaker 4: about that.
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  Speaker 1: Is very interesting. So Kentucky saw a twenty five percent
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  Speaker 1: drop in divorce rate in just what what is that?
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  Speaker 1: An eight year period? I mean, that's that says something.
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  Speaker 1: That's a pretty drastic change. Uh. And and again you
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  Speaker 1: gotta take the you gotta take the abuse out of it,
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  Speaker 1: that's right, but not affairs, right, the affair doesn't somebody
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  Speaker 1: is having an affair Biblically, you know, when is when
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  Speaker 1: is divorce? Okay? And well, if somebody is having an affair.
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  Speaker 1: That makes biblically it okay. Abuse is another situation where
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  Speaker 1: you know, but God goes yeah. That probably probably call
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  Speaker 1: that but.
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  Speaker 4: Affair.
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  Speaker 1: Somebody's having an affair. You're still looking at a fifty
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  Speaker 1: fifty split? Is that right?
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  Speaker 3: I think so? Because you can work things out.
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  Speaker 1: That's that's pretty fascinating. If you like deskar American Mama
• 5:42
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  Speaker 1: Mama's button. Turn out Abot Kimberly brother listen. Thank you
• 5:47
  Speaker 1: so much, Thank you,