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When You Realize You've Been Neglecting a Friendship · Daily Devotions for Busy Lives

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  Bart Leger: Pak Yan and Joe Chan grew up on the same streets in
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  Hong Kong, closer than most brothers. Then, in 1962, Joe's
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  family left for America, and the two boys did the only thing they
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  could. They wrote handwritten ones on airmail paper, back and
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  forth across an ocean. For a while, the letters kept the
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  friendship alive, but people move and the dresses change. One
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  letter went unanswered, and after that, the writing stopped.
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  The years piled up until there were 38 of them. Pak never quite
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  let go of Joe. He grew up and eventually moved to America
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  himself. Somewhere along the way, he decided he was going to find
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  his friend. So he sat down at his computer and searched the
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  name Joe Chan. The screen gave him 108 people, all strangers,
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  and maybe one of them was the boy he used to know. He started
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  dialing. He left one voicemail after another, working down the
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  list, most calls going nowhere. We'll come back to whether he
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  found him. But first,
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  welcome to Daily Devotions for Busy Lives. I'm Bart Leger.
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  There's a friend I was close to. Someone who mattered to me, and
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  I can't tell you the last time we talked. Nothing went wrong
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  between us. Life just filled up. If you've got a name like that
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  in your head right now, then you and I are in the same boat.
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  we can't quite remember when we stopped calling. Life sped up,
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  and new responsibilities came in. And somewhere along the way, the
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  calls got rarer, then stopped, and neither of you meant for it
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  to happen. Then, one day, their name crosses your mind, and you
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  realize how long it's been, and a wave of embarrassment hits.
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  You think about reaching out, and right behind that thought
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  comes the excuses. Oh, it's been too long, and they've probably
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  forgotten all about it. They might not even want to hear from
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  me. And that's just an excuse. But God's Word doesn't let us
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  off the hook. Listen to Proverbs 27.10.
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  Solomon's not just talking about betrayal here. He's also talking
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  about the slow forsaking, the kind that happens by neglect.
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  When a good friendship dies because nobody tended it. That's
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  the thing about friendships. They need active tending, or
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  they fade. Nobody is going to send you a reminder. No alert
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  pops up to tell you, It's been eight months since you talked to
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  someone you once knew better than almost anyone. So here's
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  what to do with the friend on your mind. First, drop the story
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  you've been telling yourself about how they must feel. You
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  can't know for sure. The person may be waiting for you to call,
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  wondering why you disappeared, Or, maybe embarrassed too,
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  feeling the same guilt you are, each of you waiting for the
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  other to go first. go first anyway. The way through the
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  awkwardness is simpler than you think. a text that says, I've
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  been thinking about you, and I'm sorry it's been so long. That's
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  it. You don't need a speech or an excuse. Most of the time, the
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  one message is all it takes to open the door again. On the
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  104th call, a voice called him back. It was Joe. After 38 years
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  and 103 dead ends, the two of them were talking again, and Joe
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  felt like they had just picked up where they left off. These
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  days, they meet every week for a bike ride and dinner. Two old
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  friends who almost lost each other to nothing more than time.
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  All it took was one of them refusing to quit dialing. Think
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  about what almost kept those two apart. It was nothing more than
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  time, and the assumption that too much of it had passed. Pack
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  could have looked at 38 years and decided it was too late.
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  Instead, he kept dialing through 103 wrong numbers to find one
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  friend. You probably don't have 100 calls to make. You have one
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  text to send. And the friend on the other end may have been
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  hoping you would. Here's today's challenge. Bring to mind one
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  friend you've been meaning to reach out to. Don't wait until
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  you have the perfect words or a good enough reason for the
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  silence. Today, send the text. I've been thinking about you. Or
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  make the call. And I'm sorry it's been so long. Then hit send
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  before the excuse talks you out of it. You're not too late, and
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  that friendship is probably more reachable than the fear is
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  telling you. Father, thank you for the friends you've given us
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  over the years, even the ones we've let drift. Forgive us for
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  the friendships we've neglected and the ones we let slide when
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  life got busy. Give us the humility to go first, to send
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  the message and own the silence. And where our friendship has
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  grown cold, you can warm it up again with something as small as
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  one simple text or a phone call. Thank you that it's rarely as
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  late as we fear. In Jesus' name, amen. If Daily Devotions for
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  Busy Lives has been an encouragement to you, would you
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  take a minute to leave a rating and review? It helps more people
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  find these devotions, and it only takes a moment. To make it
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  super easy, you can go to dailydevotionsforbusylives.com
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  slash reviews slash new. I'd be so grateful. And thanks for
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  joining me on Daily Devotions for Busy Lives. Remember,
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  friendships fade by neglect, and they come back when someone goes
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  first. Be the one who sends the text or makes the phone call,
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  because it's rarely as late as you think. Come back next time
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  for more encouragement to help you live grounded in God's truth.
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  Until then, God bless and have a great day.