Latest / 5–Minute Parenting: Tips to Help You Raise Competent, Godly Kids. / 3 Practical Ways to Help Shape your Child's Identity in God

Transcript

3 Practical Ways to Help Shape your Child's Identity in God · 5–Minute Parenting: Tips to Help You Raise Competent, Godly Kids.

• 0:01
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to another episode of the Five Minute Parenting Podcast.
• 0:05
  SPEAKER_00: I'm your host, Karen Ferguson, wife, mom, grandmom, and children's book author with a background in K-8 education and a passion for equipping parents to raise confident and God-confident kids.
• 0:17
  SPEAKER_00: In this podcast, we'll cover parenting practices for both a practical view and a biblical view.
• 0:23
  SPEAKER_00: Our goal is to help you raise kids with a positive, godly self-image so they can become all they were created to be.
• 0:30
  SPEAKER_00: I know you're busy, so we'll keep it short.
• 0:32
  SPEAKER_00: Let's take just five minutes and dive in.
• 0:39
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to another episode of Five Minute Parenting.
• 0:42
  SPEAKER_00: I'm your host, Karen Ferguson, and today we are talking about identity.
• 0:47
  SPEAKER_00: Tomorrow is Valentine's Day, and this whole month is all about love.
• 0:51
  SPEAKER_00: But unfortunately, in our culture, love is fickle and it's often presented to our kids in a distorted way.
• 0:58
  SPEAKER_00: Have you ever heard the phrase looking for love in all the wrong places?
• 1:03
  SPEAKER_00: Well, without a strong identity, our kids are going to have a hard time loving themselves, loving others, and will be more susceptible to looking for love in all the wrong places.
• 1:15
  SPEAKER_00: So to start, how do we define identity?
• 1:18
  SPEAKER_00: Identity is a sense of who we are, how others perceive us, and whether or not we are valued within society.
• 1:25
  SPEAKER_00: Having a strong sense of identity is learning we are valued, we do belong, and there is meaning to our lives.
• 1:33
  SPEAKER_00: So what does this look like for our kids?
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_00: I would say it looks like freedom and confidence to ask questions and try new things.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_00: It looks like knowing what they believe and not being so easily swayed by others' opinions.
• 1:47
  SPEAKER_00: It looks like being persistent and having a positive sense that they can contribute to the world and make a difference.
• 1:54
  SPEAKER_00: So, how can we as parents be intentional to help them?
• 1:59
  SPEAKER_00: To build a healthy identity, your child first has to feel that they belong, which they learn through secure relationships, with you, moms and dads, being their most important relationships, particularly when they are young.
• 2:13
  SPEAKER_00: You have more power than you may think.
• 2:15
  SPEAKER_00: Now that may intimidate you, but it's also a great privilege from God.
• 2:20
  SPEAKER_00: There's no mistake that God put those kids in your care for a reason, and you don't have to be perfect.
• 2:28
  SPEAKER_00: But as parents, we do have to be intentional.
• 2:30
  SPEAKER_00: So for the sake of time, here are just three simple things you can do to help your kids grow a strong identity.
• 2:38
  SPEAKER_00: First, listen.
• 2:40
  SPEAKER_00: Really listen to them.
• 2:42
  SPEAKER_00: It's all about active listening.
• 2:44
  SPEAKER_00: We can all learn to be better listeners, can't we?
• 2:47
  SPEAKER_00: But the key to active listening is to slow down, to be fully present, ask clarifying questions, and paraphrase back to them what they just said, and acknowledge their ideas, even the silly ones, without being dismissive or judgmental.
• 3:02
  SPEAKER_00: This type of listening shows them that they are important and valued.
• 3:06
  SPEAKER_00: It gives your kids a voice.
• 3:08
  SPEAKER_00: And don't forget to tell them you love them every day, no matter their age.
• 3:12
  SPEAKER_00: We can never have enough of that in our lives.
• 3:15
  SPEAKER_00: Second, encourage your child to work through problems on their own and give them choices when appropriate.
• 3:22
  SPEAKER_00: This is empowering and will help build confidence and persistence as they grow.
• 3:27
  SPEAKER_00: But I would say the most important thing you can do to help shape your child's identity is to share God's word with them, starting the day they're born.
• 3:37
  SPEAKER_00: I always say it's never too early to share God's truth with your child.
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_00: Our kids need to know they were created on purpose and for a good purpose by the creator of the universe.
• 3:48
  SPEAKER_00: When we point them to the word of God, they will understand they were fearfully and wonderfully made, just like it says in Psalm 139, and that there is significant meaning to their lives beyond what the world would try to tell them.
• 4:02
  SPEAKER_00: Parents, there are so many confusing identity messages targeted at our kids these days.
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_00: Let's be countercultural by sharing God's word with them.
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_00: Let's point them to God's truth above all and share his never-changing, never-failing, never-ending love.
• 4:19
  SPEAKER_00: This is what will help them develop a strong, healthy identity that cannot be shaken.
• 4:25
  SPEAKER_00: To help you with this, I have a fun free download in the show notes, perfect for Valentine's Day and really for every day.
• 4:32
  SPEAKER_00: You'll get eight colorful Bible affirmation card cutouts to share with your kiddos, letting them know just how special they are and how much God loves them.
• 4:42
  SPEAKER_00: So be sure to check it out in the show notes.
• 4:44
  SPEAKER_00: That's it for today.
• 4:46
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you so much for listening.
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_00: Join us next week for another episode of Five Minute Parenting.
• 4:51
  SPEAKER_00: And until next time, have a blessed week.