Latest / “I” Of The Hurricane / When Nothing's Wrong, But Everything Feels Off
Transcript
- 0:00SPEAKER_00: And trust me when I say I know what it's like to make your own life difficult.
- 0:03SPEAKER_00: Does your life feel like Groundhog Day on repeat?
- 0:06SPEAKER_00: Welcome to the Eye of the Hurricane Podcast.
- 0:13SPEAKER_00: Let's take five minutes together and talk about something all of us experience, but a majority of people simply aren't comfortable talking about.
- 0:21SPEAKER_00: And that's the fact that sometimes we just don't feel right.
- 0:25SPEAKER_00: And I don't mean situationally bad, like we can tie it to something like a breakup or a death in the family, but it's the times when nothing major seems off in our lives, or even those times when everything seems to be going really good.
- 0:38SPEAKER_00: Even in the best of times, what's funny is we can still feel off and not feel like ourselves.
- 0:43SPEAKER_00: And when that happens, sometimes we can pinpoint it.
- 0:46SPEAKER_00: Maybe we do feel lonely or totally checked out.
- 0:50SPEAKER_00: A lot of us get anxious.
- 0:51SPEAKER_00: And when things are really bad, sometimes we can feel hopeless.
- 0:54SPEAKER_00: But other times there isn't even a word for it to be described.
- 0:58SPEAKER_00: So if somebody said to you, hey, what's wrong?
- 1:00SPEAKER_00: How are you feeling?
- 1:01SPEAKER_00: You couldn't even explain specifically what it is you're going through or put your finger on it.
- 1:07SPEAKER_00: I personally, I've had a lot of those days throughout my life, and all of the people around us have too.
- 1:12SPEAKER_00: So one of the strange things about feeling that way is how everybody around us seems to be acting normal.
- 1:20SPEAKER_00: So we look around and people are laughing, they're posting vacation pictures, they're going to work, they're making weekend plans, and everybody seems to be doing just fine.
- 1:30SPEAKER_00: And it's that contradictory feeling of what we're experiencing and what we're seeing that makes us feel like we're weird or we're damaged.
- 1:38SPEAKER_00: But that's not really true.
- 1:40SPEAKER_00: So I had something that happened to me recently on the physical side.
- 1:44SPEAKER_00: So this very last week, I had uh I was coming off of a two-week cold, and I woke up and I blew my nose as hard as I could just to get things cleared out.
- 1:53SPEAKER_00: And suddenly it was like I cut an artery.
- 1:55SPEAKER_00: It was unbelievable.
- 1:57SPEAKER_00: Blood was gushing down my face, it's running down the back of my throat at a pace I can't even describe.
- 2:03SPEAKER_00: And I could not get it to stop.
- 2:05SPEAKER_00: And this went on close to an hour.
- 2:08SPEAKER_00: It was towards that 60-minute mark, I thought to myself, I think I'm gonna die.
- 2:12SPEAKER_00: I'm either gonna bleed out or I'm gonna suffocate.
- 2:15SPEAKER_00: And eventually I ended up going to the emergency room.
- 2:18SPEAKER_00: Well, the doctor comes in, we take a few of the necessary steps, and eventually we get it to stop.
- 2:23SPEAKER_00: But at the end of the visit, I said, Have you ever seen anything like that before?
- 2:29SPEAKER_00: Knowing the answer was no.
- 2:31SPEAKER_00: Well, she looked at me and she was a little bit surprised and she said, Have I?
- 2:35SPEAKER_00: And then she proceeded to say with a smile on her face, yes, it's pretty common with a bad cold.
- 2:40SPEAKER_00: And it's about five times worse if someone's on blood thinners.
- 2:44SPEAKER_00: And I remember last week immediately how different I felt.
- 2:47SPEAKER_00: So nothing physically had changed.
- 2:50SPEAKER_00: My nose was in the same condition as it was before, but I wasn't nearly as scared and I didn't feel like an outlier because suddenly I understood what was happening to me wasn't strange at all.
- 3:02SPEAKER_00: It actually was pretty common.
- 3:04SPEAKER_00: And it was that realization for me that changed things and got me to totally relax.
- 3:10SPEAKER_00: So it got me thinking, I wonder how many times we experience things emotionally and they become so much heavier because we think it's only specific to us.
- 3:21SPEAKER_00: Depending on the day, there's so many of us that are recognized.
- 3:24SPEAKER_00: We know what it's like, man, questioning ourselves just feel down in general.
- 3:28SPEAKER_00: Or we're on the edge of our seats waiting for something to go wrong if we tend to be anxious.
- 3:33SPEAKER_00: What's ironic is that we can have great friends and sometimes feel like nobody really knows us.
- 3:38SPEAKER_00: I always think back to Bush's song, Glycerine, with one of the best lines that I think was ever recorded.
- 3:44SPEAKER_00: And it was, I'm never alone, but I'm alone all the time.
- 3:48SPEAKER_00: And there's a reason at the concert, the entire crowd screams those lyrics.
- 3:53SPEAKER_00: It's because they can relate.
- 3:55SPEAKER_00: So we can love our families more than anything and still occasionally want to disappear for a little while and be alone.
- 4:00SPEAKER_00: We can be incredibly grateful for our lives and still have days where we feel super down and don't even want to face the day.
- 4:08SPEAKER_00: All of that is totally normal.
- 4:10SPEAKER_00: When we can't figure out the puzzle, what do we do?
- 4:14SPEAKER_00: We take it into our own hands to go find somebody that can help us.
- 4:17SPEAKER_00: And that's when we seek out our mental health teammates.
- 4:20SPEAKER_00: And honestly, I'm sure every one of us would benefit greatly if we had a counselor, a psychologist, or a psychiatrist on our team.
- 4:27SPEAKER_00: So I'm not a doctor, and today I don't have any kind of answers.
- 4:32SPEAKER_00: But I did just want to say that it's okay to feel how you feel, and the people around you are feeling the exact same way.
- 4:40SPEAKER_00: So you're normal, you're good, just keep going.
- 4:44SPEAKER_00: Thanks for taking the time to tune in.