Latest / The Treehouse Show Podcast / Treehouse LIVE! | The Treehouse Podcast, Episode 78

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Treehouse LIVE! | The Treehouse Podcast, Episode 78 · The Treehouse Show Podcast

0:30
I'm a firm believer in getting the first grew up done quickly. Just ripped
0:35
the band aid off back, fingered the button on my machine and play a
0:38
bumper instead of the open go team. I'm with you. I mean,
0:45
if it's gonna happen, get it out of the way in the first five
0:47
seconds, because once again we have cracked the code of entertainment. Not everyone
0:54
has, but we here in the Treehouse cracked that code many many, many,
0:58
many many years ago. And that is to set the bar and expectations
1:02
so low it is impossible not to go beyond it. I just love how
1:07
you did it. We rehearsed it four times and you were so proud of
1:11
yourself and I still hit the wrong goddamn buddy. That's all right, that's
1:17
all right. We are here. It is time to leave your worries outside.
1:23
Join me Dan O'Malley, Trey Trenholm, and Raj Sharma inside this year
1:30
treehouse, let's get stupid. Super Bowl fifty eight was last night, and
1:38
since I am two hours ahead of DFW time, I didn't go to bed
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till lafter one because those a holes couldn't decide to score enough touchdowns during regulation
1:49
they had to wait for extra time to do it. But overall, I'd
1:56
say that was a really good game as long as you don't mind not a
2:00
hunt of scoring last for me, though, what is it? Trey?
2:07
I didn't get to see a lot of the especially the I saw all the
2:10
overtime. I didn't get to see it a lot of the game because of
2:15
work. But it seemed to like it kind of started off good and then
2:20
it had a nice dead spot for a couple quarters, and then fourth seemed
2:24
to pick up. I'd say that's a very accurate assessment a dead spot,
2:30
and that was the good time that we had to uh go back for seconds
2:36
at the buffet we had set up at our house. Last night. We
2:38
had a few neighbors over. Even though it's pitch black at night, there
2:45
are neighbors of ours here in the moist forest on Bordeaux Mountain of Saint John
2:51
usb I. They are our moist forest neighbor dweller neighbors. And they ventured
2:58
out into the night with crock pots and booze into our home and we watched
3:04
football, like goddamn Americans. That's very sweet that you're still carrying that on
3:12
over there. That's very cool. It was actually one of our first times
3:14
to do any sort of entertaining here, so that that was fun for us.
3:17
Plus it gave us an excuse to make a bunch of food that we
3:21
wouldn't otherwise eat, let alone, let alone in those quantities. What did
3:25
you have? Yes? What did Okay? Yeah, we went a little
3:35
bit of everything. But and I'm gonna guess there was nothing low fat on
3:38
the menu. Nope. Yeah, it's it's Super Bowl Sunday. You take
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you take all the low fat, all the calorie counting, all that nonsense,
3:47
and you you throw that out the window, kind of like the way
3:53
I'm sure Jerry Jones wants to do with his children once a day, especially
4:00
after watching the Super Bowl. Now, there were a bunch of things I
4:02
noticed last night. It's difficult not to whenever the Super Bowl happens. It's
4:06
one of those rare days where you can turn on the TV and just kind
4:09
of let it go most of the day, and there's various things throughout the
4:13
day when they start the broadcast. But one of the first things that stood
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out to me was JJ wattson adventurous new hairstyle, And by new, I
4:24
mean it looked really good on the side of a kiss FM wrapped vehicle.
4:29
On Kid Kratik said circa nineteen ninety nine, I mean, I have not
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seen frosted tips that gorgeous. I think since the Backtree Boys. I have
4:43
to give you a little insight on me. I did the frosted tips in
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college. Oh yeah, and blue contacts. Wow, So you went through
4:56
a white phase. I did. I did you know, Trey and I
5:00
can't do that. I mean, they're constantly in a white face. We
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can't do the opposite. Yeah, I was. You just got you guys
5:09
just call it a phase. But yeah, I uh so when I saw
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that, I was like, oh, I did that in ninety six.
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I did. Like his tweet after the game he threw out there, He's
5:21
like, sometimes you tried to you want to do something new with your hair
5:25
and wonder if anybody will notice they do? Uh. Some of the some
5:30
of the commercials that to me, I didn't see every single one of them
5:32
because I was going back and forth, you know, to the to the
5:34
food table and talking with some people here and there. But some of the
5:36
commercials that stood out to me that some are my favorites. The Arnold State
5:42
Farm, the Dunk Kings with the cameos by Matt Damon and Tom Brady.
5:48
I had I think I counted three separate Super Bowl commercials he was in,
5:54
like three completely separate, you know, ads, different companies, and so
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it's like he went from Super Bowl when quarterback to Super Bowl commercial quarterback,
6:01
which is obviously good for him. Another one of my favorites, partially because
6:06
Raj does. My favorite Christopher walkin impersonation was Christopher Waltkins BMW commercial where everyone
6:13
does their impersonation of him to him yes, which I'm afraid to think is
6:17
probably based in a lot of reality, and that makes me feel bad for
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that old man. That was That was my favorite of all. I was
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like, that's so brilliant. Whoever came up with that was obvious is either
6:28
a comic or knows a comic that does the impression. And I wouldn't put
6:32
it past Walking to come up with that himself. Yeah, that, I
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mean, I can I can just hear him. I can hear him talking
6:39
to the talking, you know, in the pit, saying well, I've
6:41
got an idea. Yeah, it's why it sound terrible. But and the
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ben Affleck commercial just so I don't know what everybody gets paid. Like you
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were talking about the cameos with Matt Damon, Tom Brady, Jennifer Lopez was
6:54
obviously in that one, but he got afflet got ten million for that commercial,
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for the spot or the entire endorsement campaign because this started pre Super Bowl
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for the spot, we gotta get famous. Don't get me wrong, doing
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this is fun, but it doesn't pay as well as ten million dollars thirty
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second Dunkin Donuts ad with your wife and friends. Yeah, I saw that.
7:23
I think like a couple hours before it's the dungeal watch out for the
7:27
Dunkings commercial because athlete got paid ten million, and then it didn't say who
7:30
the other cameos were going to be, So I don't know how much those
7:33
guys got just for doing that. Yeah, it makes me wonder how much
7:39
j Lo got for her cut of that spot. Yes, I would think
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she could. I would think her cred, her star power could command a
7:46
higher salary than him. Yes, some other things. Obviously, the Usher
7:53
halftime show also had a dead spot, which was most of it, but
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wow, it was it was dead in the middle. We'll go back to
8:03
that don't worry, we'll go back to that. You guys obviously loved it.
8:07
Thought a screamed okay, good. You know, you know what's good
8:11
to have on a Monday conflict. Let's just beat the hell out of each
8:13
other. We also learned last night that Dees caught it back in twenty fourteen.
8:18
Yeau so I think it was. I can't remember if it was third
8:22
or fourth quarter. The forty nine Ers receiver catches the ball on the sideline,
8:26
takes two steps, the ball pops out when he hits the ground while
8:28
making a football move, and the official comes in on CBS during the broadcast
8:33
and tests that is a catch. He made the move. Blah blah blah,
8:37
and all Cowboys fans around the world stood up and said, ah,
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we're still mad about it. It even does tweet it out that's not a
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catch. I like the snark. Yeah done. And I'd also like to
8:52
point out during the game last night, we saw one of the greatest comebacks
8:56
ever, not the Chiefs coming back against the forty nine Ers, but the
9:01
ad for Deadpool three. Deadpool versus Deadpool and Wolverine single handedly resurrected the Marvel
9:09
cinematic universe. Yeah, thank you, thank you, Marvel Jesus resurrected by
9:18
the one movie they really didn't want to make. Yeah, I mean it
9:22
started out pretty strong. When you've got the guys with the sticks and he
9:24
says, you know, well, woll friend though pegging. Maybe pegging may
9:28
not be new to me, but it is for Disney. And then he
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looks at the screen, so I'm those those are those are a bunch of
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mind. Sorry, my god, Bob, there's somebody at the door.
9:43
Sorry, it's okay. Tell everyone the dog's nighbors because we got people watching.
9:48
That's that's Sam barking. And then Reese's is right here, so that's
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sweet boy, that sweet boy Sam, who's not so sweet right now?
9:56
And then pretty blater. Hey, well he's protect you, yes, or
10:01
he wants to kill or maybe he's mad at me. Because I was not
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a huge fan of the Usher halftime show, I think that's what it was.
10:09
So let me defend myself before you tube jump my ball sack on this.
10:16
It wasn't good until like the last what five minutes or so, because
10:20
most of the songs I didn't really recognize or they were slowed down or done
10:22
in the mix that I didn't completely understand, and I didn't like the fact
10:30
that it felt like Usher was trying to have sex with everyone watching at the
10:35
same time. Which, don't get me wrong, I appreciate shooting your shot,
10:39
but it's not shooting it when you could actually do it. That's not
10:45
just shooting the shot, that's flaunting it. Yeah, because I got news
10:50
for you. I you know, I was working last night at you know,
10:52
standard Poor Very you know, and when he took his shirt off,
10:58
Yeah, every middle aged woman in the restaurant started screaming. I mean,
11:03
yeah, I love. I loved. One of the things I saw last
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night afterwards. It was last year's Super Bowl halftime we saw Rihanna pregnant,
11:11
and this year's Super Bowl halftime Usher got everybody pregnant. Yeah. I was
11:18
a tower club watching watching the game, and the same thing happened when he
11:22
first when he popped on scream it was great. People were very, very
11:26
excited. But when the shirt came off, every woman in there and a
11:28
couple of guys, uh started screaming as well. And I was like,
11:33
like, okay, And a buddy of mine who's very fit, who's sitting
11:37
there in his in his tight T shirt goes, I look like that too,
11:41
He yelled that out. No, no, you don't. And even
11:46
if you do, Usher's got a few legs up on you, and I
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didn't unless you can do it on roller skates to sit down and shut up.
11:54
Thank you exactly, thank you. So I have I have two very
11:58
distinct thoughts on the roller skates. First of all, I find it entirely
12:03
unfair for any human to be that good looking, can sing and can dance
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better than pretty much everybody on the planet. And on top of that,
12:16
you have to be so arrogant as to be good at rollers skating. Come
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on, that's not that's not fair. And to make things worse, I'm
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still trying to figure out how the hell it was he switched out of the
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roller skates back into sneakers in a matter of seconds. I'm still wearing skates
12:35
from the seventh grade. They've never come off. I think they were just
12:39
attachments. I think they that's the That was the thing for a while back
12:43
in the nineties, where they would just attach the to the shoes that you
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wore. You can just have. Well, that's not a new thing.
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That was how they like, that's how they I don't know if they started
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that way, but they were the like the skates that just they just went
12:56
to the bottom of your shoe and you strapped them around your shoe. Yeah,
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they're like cramp for mountain climbing. Basically, gotcha. But tone Bell
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is one of those guys that skates just that well and can act and dance
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and is very good looking. So they're there if you ever want to talk
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to him about it. He he has videos out of him roller skating.
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It's really good. Is he wearing anything besides the skates? Yes, I
13:22
mean he's not. He's not shirtless, but that was. But here's here's
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the comic in me. I kept going, fall, please fall, Please
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fall, and then he slides through I can't remember whose legs he slipped through,
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and then he goes to stand up and he slips and that that made
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my halftime shot. Speaking of people slipping, did you see the the girl
13:41
on the stripper pole fall? No, there was next to when Ludacris comes
13:46
out and the place goes crazy. So would Ludacris and Little John come out?
13:50
That was my favorite. Once Usher started playing the hit that everybody knows
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and was waiting for then. I was in for it. That part I
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absolutely loved and hearing that part. There were two really weird mishaps. One
14:03
was and you can find this online. I'll try and find it for you
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and I'll see if I can show it. When you're looking at Ludicrous over
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off of his right shoulder, there's a girl on a stripper pole and she's
14:13
almost all the way up and you see her, you know, you see
14:18
her button, your legs are wrapped around it, and then out of nowhere,
14:20
just down she goes. And that was not planned. Hmmm. It's
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not one of those stripper moves where they go like all the way down on
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the pole and then stop. I don't. I don't think there's a stripper
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move called thud gravity. I don't. I don't think there's a I don't
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think, you know, like I don't remember the scene in Flash Dance where
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she learned to splat. The other one was during the Little John part and
14:46
is everyone's bouncing up and down. He's like, get down for what people
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are jumping up and down with their hands up and out of nowhere, there's
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a guy in the back of the crowd that gets shot up into the air.
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I don't know how, and then he just comes right back down.
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And of course the thing that everyone who saw this is thinking is is that
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guy Okay? Yes, so there was a there were two or two or
15:09
three people, so you saw that guy go up, and then they had
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I guess they just can plan it right, So they had to pull the
15:13
camera back because there were two guys that go over into the It looks like
15:18
they're going into the crowd, but they then just pop up. So it
15:20
was planned. Oh I know what was planned, because here you have an
15:24
array of performers and unless I'm wrong, they were they were all performers of
15:28
color. Uh. And the one guy that I see get tossed in the
15:33
crowd is a white dude. He's the only guy that would go, hey,
15:37
so here's the who wants to do the where we shoot you straight into
15:39
the air. And every person of color just turned to the white guy.
15:45
It was like he'll do it. He's probably eating his sandwich going on there,
15:50
I'll do it, yeah, or like you're gonna you're gonna shoot me
15:52
into the air. I'm gonna we like it down here, we're on roller
15:56
skates, We're good. It's like whatever the super Bowl was when it was
16:00
Katy Perry and you had left shark that sort of stole the show. Yeah,
16:03
his left shark didn't know the moves in this one. This performance had
16:07
layers. You had skates, you had you had nipples, you had a
16:12
white dude being tossed up in the crowd, and instead of left shark,
16:18
you had left pole or left stripper falling off her pole. Yeah, so
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I don't understand what where's the dead spot for you? Is it just because
16:26
the all the fun stuff happened once he played the hit, like when they
16:30
were all the thing happened, So it was like a slow build and it
16:33
was like, man, it's okay. It sort of felt like it felt
16:37
like slow jam. They felt like slow jam in the super Bowl halftime show
16:41
for the first I don't know, ten minutes. So it's just the songs
16:44
that you don't know. Yes, I'm sorry, but when you're that big
16:49
of an act and you play the Super Bowl, it's like it's like going
16:53
to see any act you've known for twenty thirty years. You want them when
16:56
you go to see him in concert, you want to see him play your
16:59
favorite songs, not the crap off the new album, but there was nothing
17:03
often to it. They were all the hits. Like everybody in that tower,
17:06
I'm not even making this up. Everybody was singing along to every song
17:10
and that that and you know what, that may be very much kind of
17:12
a generation because there the five years in between. You know, Dan,
17:18
Raj and I are basically five years older than you and yeah, and that
17:21
may be the the that prime, that window where Usher was in his prime,
17:23
because I'm with Raj. Every everything he played was a hit, a
17:27
huge hit. Yeah. Yeah, they were all smashed like chart topping songs.
17:33
Uh they played. He just closed with the big one with with the
17:37
surprise, you know, appearances by Ludichris and Little John Germain Dupris and all
17:41
that. Well, so that one out. Those guys coming in didn't surprise
17:45
me because they were on that They were on that song. Those are the
17:48
kind of the those are the cameos I was kind of not only not only
17:52
hoping for, but I was expecting. Yeah. And then Alicia Keys,
17:55
which at the end I was like, and she's married to Swiss Beats and
17:59
I was like, and then I saw them and I was like, oh,
18:00
maybe she's not anymore. I don't know what's happening. Thank you for
18:03
bringing that up, because I was wondering if Alicia Keys was about to get
18:07
pregnant over that piano. I'm pretty sure. I'm pretty sure she did.
18:11
I don't know what that piano didn't look as much like a piano as it
18:15
did like it just needed to start vibrating and spinning. They just put a
18:21
quarter in it. That's a halftime show. Seriously, if you want the
18:26
Parents Television Council to be really pissed off, you think they were mad about
18:30
a nipple back in you know, two thousand and whatever with Janet Jackson.
18:33
Why do you see a baby get made on the fifty yard line? Yeah,
18:37
I'm sure all the calls went in from that and the strippers and and
18:41
but Justin Bieber apparently was supposed to be on the show. But was he
18:45
the one that was being tossed in the crowd. No, he declined last
18:52
minute. He showed up in Vegas with his pastor, and his pastor as
18:59
they were going to their bus was blessing. I was uh. They phrased
19:04
it something like, uh, removing all the sin from Sin City as he
19:08
walked to his bus. So I think that's why there was gonna be strippers.
19:12
And just hearing that, I'm thinking that maybe he actually was the dude
19:17
being tossed around in the crowd, or maybe it was his pastor. The
19:23
pastor is a new surflas Ola guy. Yeah, you had no idea how
19:29
they how they got new uh new performers, did you by? Roger said,
19:34
though, you know, it makes you realize celebrities can't have that.
19:37
You know a lot of couples have that list of the freebie. You know,
19:41
if I saw this person, you know it's not cheating. I'm allowed.
19:47
You're a celebrity. You can't do that because if you're Swiss beats,
19:49
Yeah, you just you know, you're you just have to sit back and
19:52
watch. Yeah, there's nothing like being cucked in front of one hundred million
19:56
peop We're listening to the Treehouse. Visit us online at Treehouse on air dot
20:14
com this week at the Dallas Comedy Club in Deep Elum. You've probably seen
20:30
one of his videos with over one point five million views, and after selling
20:33
out last time, David Nihill is back with his new show Shelf Help.
20:37
There's people we never did it. It's a fairly unique group of white people
20:44
in history where you're like, well, what did they do? Nothing we're
20:47
good at. Actually, you might correctly say, well didn't you blow up
20:52
some British people and we'll be like yeah, but historically, who hasn't wanted
20:56
to do that? That's David Nihil This Friday and Saturday, February sixteenth and
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seventeenth at the Dallas Comedy Club. For tickets, go to Dallas Dashcomedyclub dot
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com. That's Dallas Dashcomedyclub dot com. Your new home for comedy in DFW
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is the Dallas Comedy Club. Funny happens here. Let's get Kerrie Cook from
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COOKDFW roofing and Restoration into the treehouse. Now you can give her a call
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for your free roof inspection at eight three to three Cook DFW the website cookdfw
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dot com. Carrie, do you know what the Fort Worth Zoo is doing
21:30
for Valentine's Day this year? I have not heard. They will let you
21:34
dedicate who to your X this Valentine's Day for a mere ten dollars. They
21:40
will symbolically dedicate a pound of zoo pooh in the name of whomever you would
21:45
like. That's an interesting twist. On Valentine's Day. It is usually zoos
21:49
will be like, oh, you can name a cockroach or of whatever you
21:52
after your ex that you can't stand going the poo route is bold. Absolutely
21:57
pound of monk pooh was certified monkey poo and they tell you who it came
22:03
from. I don't think it should happen, but just in case you get
22:07
some pound of pooh that you know falls through your roof around Valentine's Day,
22:11
give carry and Daniel Lacall at Cook DFW Roofing and Restoration. That phone number
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is, of course eight three three Cook DFW. The website cookdfw dot com.
22:21
It's the tree House. You're in the treehouse. Visit us online at
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Treehouse on air dot com. This segment, I forgot to mention that there
22:48
might be a special appearance in the Treehouse today by Trey's dog Daisy the three
22:52
pounds Jesus Christ dot com Three pound Dais and her tongue. I feel like
23:00
if she was a stand up act rage would Daisy be the headliner or would
23:06
the tongue be the headliner and Daisy feature? Oh, it's the tongue is
23:10
the headliner's kind of it? Sure? This segment of the Treehouse is in
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fact brought to you by our friends at Cook DFW Roofing and Restoration. For
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your free roof inspection. Give Daniel and or Kerry Cook a call eight three
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to three Cook DFW or the website cookdfw dot com. Also the first segment
23:32
brought to you by the Dallas Comedy Club. Very fittingly, five nights of
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Just go to Dallas Dash Comedy Club dot com. That's Dallas Dash Comedy
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Club dot com. So back to the halftime show and then oh oh,
24:02
coming up in today's show. By the way, coming up in today's show,
24:04
I have finally finished a new Dan dough and by the time you hear
24:11
it, it will finish you all right. Yeah, I'm My hopes are
24:18
high on this one, so I hope you enjoy it when I play it.
24:23
That'll probably be coming up here in just a few minutes. But first
24:26
I was curious, is it just because you guys recognized all the songs that
24:32
Usher did at halftime, and that makes me a square for not really recognizing
24:37
the other stuff. And where does this one rank as far as all time
24:41
halftime performances. I don't think anybody's said square since fifty seven. But that's
24:52
not true square pegs. In the eighties, it was a TV show,
24:55
Okay, gotcha, thanks trag. No, it's just you didn't recognize the
25:00
songs. That's why it was, you know, you know, the club
25:03
hit, because that's probably well. But even though, but I look at
25:06
it this way, even if I didn't recognize the hits, then I would
25:08
have if they were hits, then they would have been catchy enough to me
25:11
to be like, this is a cool song. I haven't heard this,
25:14
but I like it. And I was kind of like, yeah, I
25:17
mean it's it's yeah, you didn't recognize them. They were all all hits
25:21
the but yeah, it was the big club hit for like two years,
25:23
so I mean, that's uh, and everybody knew that the words and the
25:26
dance moves and all that stuff. For me, i'd put it in the
25:30
top five. Really yeah, So give me quickly your top five. Prince
25:38
Purple Rain in the Rain, then Michael Jackson, and then I don't know,
25:48
I'm trying to think of the other Steely Dan. Yes, of course,
25:51
who didn't who didn't love them? I still remember when they announced that
25:55
that year, that at the super Bowl. That was in the wake of
25:57
the Janet Jackson stuff, so they were trying to be as safe as possible.
26:00
It's like, okay, you've over corrected with Steely Dan. Yeah,
26:03
I mean the Jenet Jackson justin Timberlake one was great. And then I don't
26:07
know, Aerosmith and seeing Britney Spears kind of just the star power. Yeah,
26:12
and then I like that one's I'm a huge Arrow Smith fan. But
26:15
yeah, and then and so now Usher Tray, what about you? Prince
26:22
will always be the the number one. I don't think anyone will ever touch
26:26
that. I would definitely put Usher, I would say probably top three off
26:32
the top of my head. Beyonce justin Timberlake's halftime I thought was excellent,
26:41
and you know, the Janet Jackson even though all the crap a cause that
26:45
that was actually a good show. And you know, just to throw out
26:49
of my whiteness, Coldplay was actually but I was feeling like you needed to
26:56
throw it out. Yeah, you know, you know, if they could
26:59
have combined Coldplay with Steely Dan, that'd be the whitest halftime show. Well,
27:04
I will tell you listen, I would say this and I and I
27:07
I I Michael Jackson was always one of my best shows I ever saw,
27:12
and it's on the Victory Tour. But Coldplay puts on one of the top
27:15
shows I've ever seen in my life. I've ever been to a Coldplay concert,
27:19
but I've seen clips and and those clips are extremely impressive. It is,
27:23
and going to the concert it like their videos. I mean, it's
27:30
it's very interactive and you know, and they're at a point they just play
27:33
there. Literally they play hit and start to finish. They don't play they
27:37
didn't even have new music, they just play the hits. Yeah all I
27:40
want, yes, but no, I think that the Prince uh, I
27:47
mean, I don't even know how you like that's one of those miracle moments.
27:52
It starts raining and then he's like, oh, okay, I think
27:53
we played here. That's like they did a documentary on that, and one
28:00
of the parts of it was how you know the producer is talking about how
28:04
wake up? And you know, it's pouring down rain and then they they
28:07
call Prince and yeah, they're like, you know it's raining. He's like,
28:14
yeah, he ges, can you make it rain harder? All right,
28:18
Well, I guess we're gonna be okay, because you remember that stage
28:21
was like a crylic glass and all of them, I mean, Prince always
28:25
wore heels or platform shoes, but those dancers were in like seven inch heels,
28:29
but it was not and no problems. Yeah, Prince worth six in
28:33
shields all the time. You know why. You know why they didn't have
28:36
any issue slipping on that stage tray because cream is not as slippery as water.
28:41
Fair enough. Well, yeah, that was that. I don't you
28:48
can't ever have another moment like that. That was I have. I have
28:49
a difficult time with my memory in general, but I have, and because
28:53
of that, I have a difficult time remembering all the Super Bowl halftime shows.
28:56
I'd have to go back through and like watch clips of them to truly
29:00
myself. But the Prince one is one I don't need. That to me
29:03
is iconic. But when you get a little man like that in the rain,
29:10
it's like it's moments like that where I don't know what's necessarily true in
29:17
the world when it comes to religion, in God and all these types of
29:19
things. But that's one of those moments where you you could use as a
29:22
really good example of be like Prince super Bowl halftime, purple rain in the
29:30
rain seems pretty divine. M Yeah, it was a I'm convinced of this,
29:40
Michael, Yeah, Michael Jackson and Prince of that ilk where they can
29:45
go. I would like it. I would like for it to rain now
29:47
and then and then weather happens like like they listen, the universe listens to
29:52
Prince when he says that I'm about to play purple rain and it needs to
29:56
rain now. Oh you know what it was. It wasn't as acessarily that
30:00
it started raining. It was because Prince said I'm going to play purple rain
30:04
now, and mother nature came, I love you. But this feels like
30:15
a natural time to introduce you to the brand new Dando in the Treehouse.
30:22
Raj, You've been in and out of the Treehouse for many years. Trey
30:26
was a part of it for many years like I was. And because I
30:30
have such a poor memory, I don't necessarily remember exactly how these started in
30:36
the first place. I tried to find I tried to find the drop that
30:40
we got from. I'm brain farting now because my memory is so terrible.
30:48
The Jackals lead singer Trey Oh God, yeah exactly. We had him on
30:56
the show a number of times over the years, had him at trash parties,
31:00
and he came in the studio one time and Russ got into sort of
31:07
sing or slash scream pretty little Dan, because Russ like to give me a
31:12
hard time, say no, you're pretty and whatever, like no I'm not,
31:15
and stop hitting on me, you weird old man, and it sort
31:21
of took on a life of its own. Next thing, you know,
31:23
Jesse James Deprie, thank you. I knew it was a three name that
31:27
wasn't a serial killer, but all only serial killer names were coming to mind,
31:30
and I knew it wasn't John wyn Gacy we had in the studio because
31:33
I'd remember that, especially if he was saying my name loudly. Yeah,
31:41
that'd be a whole new line of Dan Do those are Dan Do's I do
31:48
not want to produce? Yeah, those are snuff Dan dos. Uh.
31:55
So it started with that and the next thing, you know, we write
31:57
up these things for adult toys from Pretty Little Dan Incorporated called the Dan Dough
32:02
instead of a dildo, and these things you know that have a weird way
32:06
of being born on the show, and they just kind of stick and then
32:10
after a while you kind of forget how they started, but you keep it
32:15
going because it's fun and ultimately stupid. So if I can make this work,
32:24
this, by the way, will be I'm hoping not the only time
32:30
we ever get a chance to play this. But I do have what I
32:34
think is a semi binding legal disclaimer embedded in here so as to not get
32:40
us sued by the Death Cowboys. Nice, but just in case you're gonna
32:46
hear it now and then after this. I don't know if we're gonna get
32:49
a cn D from Frisco or not, but if we do, you get
32:54
to enjoy it now, are you guys ready? No, you're not.
33:00
Dallas Cowboys fans, It's time to ask yourselves a rock hard question. Why
33:06
stop it getting emotionally destroyed when you can get physically wrecked by them boys?
33:12
After a John Holmes size break, Pretty Little Dan Incorporated is back, and
33:16
just like the back of the bank bus, we are not alone. We
33:20
have an exciting announcement, eld Inc. Is the very unofficial, totally unsanctioned,
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extremely unsanitary dildo company of the Dallas Cowboys. That's right, We're expanding
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into the sports world, because why should Taylor Swift and Oscar the Grouch have
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all the fun when the Cowboys were on the trash heap first? So slip
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into your favorite Debbie does Dallas cosplay fit, invite thirty one strangers over wearing
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their official NFL team gimp gear. Embrace yourself for a worse pass dreaming than
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Say all the right things to get you in the mood. Then feel the
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rush of air on your face as his balls fly aimlessly into the hands of
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a stranger in a packer's jersey. You see Michael Gallup do what he does
34:17
best, standing there and watching. Don't just see Tony Pollard run full speed
34:23
into the wrong hole. Eel it. See Micah Parsons held by three linemen,
34:31
which is actually a good thing, because the Ai Michaeh Parsons ingry Lion
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34:40
vander esh is broken that he got while muff hunting in Siberia. Like Mike
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McCarthy eating his post game dairy queen. With the Cowboy Dando, you too
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the Cowboy Dando is in no way, no, how, not all affiliated
36:15
with the Dallas Cowboys. It's trademarks now, it's actual official sponsors or broadcast
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Otherwise, please check with the official dllas Cowboys team doctor before starting any
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sexual regiment and all the objects real or imagine the Cowboys Dando. Unlike the
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Cowboys, this is a piece of chrome plated hardware you can actually hoist at
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the end of the night. Another fine product from PLD Inc. Very nice.
36:44
That was brilliant. I'd like to say, we'll call the official time
36:52
twelve to fifty Central Standard time, and we'll start the countdown clock to our
36:59
season. Decist from the Dallas Cowboys. I also think I also think my
37:10
chances of ever hosting the pre game, halftime or postgame on the Dallas Cowboys
37:15
Radio Network has now gone away. Jeff k is breathing a little easier,
37:23
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but are offered and sold through individually licensed and appointed agents. Two one,
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four, three six eight thirty eight thirty eight. That's the phone number that
38:59
you will need for any and all of those plumbing wants and needs from Brooks
39:04
Plumbing the website Brooks Plumbingtexas dot com. So let's get Jacqueline in here.
39:07
Jacqueline, have you ever been accused of being a tattletale? No, not
39:12
really, because I'd say, deep down inside, I really respect what I
39:15
call the gangster codes. You just you know, I didn't see anything.
39:19
I'm blind, but I will tell you when it comes to construction, plumbing
39:24
and the business industry, I believe that a well informed homeowner is dangerous in
39:30
a good way. And so in March, early March, we're going to
39:32
be recording a series of videos and we're going to release probably a video a
39:37
month, and it's going to teach homeowners how to decipher basically up selling and
39:43
things that maybe aren't necessary, that are just made to make the contractor more
39:49
money from being able to decipher that from what they actually need. So,
39:53
as an example, I harp on this all the time. You should not
39:57
have to pay a monthly fee to a contractor to have the family pricing.
40:01
Member pricing that twenty dollars a month does should not entitle you to a thousands
40:08
of dollars discount. That thousands of dollars discount should be the contractor's actual price.
40:14
So we're, you know, doing away with the misnomer that to get
40:16
the best price, you've got to have the membership. The membership is horse
40:20
hockey. We're going to be kind of spilling the tea, as I like
40:22
to call it on everybody else in town. Well, I'm here for it
40:25
because she wants to help your plumbing once and needs not what's good for the
40:30
bottom line of the company. So give them a call. Two one,
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four, three, six eight thirty eight thirty eight and Brooks Plumbing, Texas
40:36
dot com. Visit is online that Treehouse on air dot com. You're listening
40:45
to the tree House visites online That Treehouse on air dot com. This segment
40:57
of the Treehouse is brought to you. Buy plumbing for any and all of
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your plumbing wants and needs give Brooks Plumbing you call two one four three six
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eight thirty eight thirty eight. That's two one four three six eight thirty eight
41:08
thirty eight the website Brooks Plumbing Texas dot com. Been about four minutes and
41:22
I've yet to receive the seasoned assist from the Cowboys, So good on us.
41:29
Be curious if Vegas would take bets on an over under on that one.
41:32
Mm hm, anyway, there was h what today's a twelve? I
41:39
means you got those thirteen. So Wednesday is Valentine's Day. Wednesday's Valentine's Day.
41:45
Valentine's Day is coming up, Raj. You're in a relationship, are
41:51
you? Do you have anything big plan for Valentine's Day. We're doing it
41:53
on the thirteenth because I will be in Austin on Valentine's Day and then I'll
41:58
be in San Antonio from the fifteenth to the eighteenth stand up shows. So
42:01
you got to work. So you're getting Valentine's Day in early yeah. So
42:06
we're just gonna go for dinner. And I already bought the gifts ahead of
42:10
time, So oh gifts? Yes, is it uncommon for you to work
42:19
on Valentine's Day. Uh No, it's it's it's pretty common. Valentin's Day
42:23
and New Year's Eve all that stuff and your most expensive date nights of the
42:28
year, you magically are working. Yeah, I magine, Yeah, it's
42:34
you know, I could say no to the gig, but I mean if
42:37
you said no to the gig, then you wouldn't have money to get her
42:39
gifts plural exactly. So already the I already bought roses. They're they're already
42:45
here, and so they're beautiful orange roses. She got that. She got
42:52
a couple of other really nice gifts. And then we're going to do dinner
42:55
and then I will head out of town to go make money from other people
43:00
enjoying their date night. So, uh, tray for Valentine's Day. What
43:05
are you and Daisy your chuawah doing? So, I'll uh probably cook a
43:10
steak and I might give her a bite. Yeah, one bite of steak
43:16
to Daisy is like her trying to eat that old ninety six er in the
43:20
great outdoors with John Candy. Well, that's a sweet date night. Yeah,
43:27
And what do you have plant, Dan? Do you have a oh?
43:30
Nothing? Uh? I for many years I thought it was a trap
43:34
when Tara told me she didn't like to do Valentine's Day stuff, and even
43:40
even back when she first mentioned it on our on our first Valentine's Day,
43:45
I told myself, I'm not I'm I told myself, I'm going to believe
43:49
her. I believe that she is a woman of her word and that it's
43:52
not some sort of uh, manipulative trap like others on the show at the
43:57
time tried to tell me that it was, because then if it had been,
44:01
then I would have been like, well, you said you didn't want
44:04
anything, and I took you at your words, so your your word's no
44:07
good. But that wasn't the case. She actually really didn't like Valentine's Day.
44:10
And so for what about fifteen years now, I've not had to worry
44:16
about Valentine's Day once, and it's beautiful. And because of that, it's
44:21
really like every day is Valentine's Day. When you don't plan for one stop
44:30
up, she's keeping track. You can say it all you want, fifteen
44:36
years she's she's waiting to say something, Yeah, that's it. And then
44:38
on her you know, on her episode of the Trade on Investigation Discovery.
44:44
When they're in reviewing her in jail, she'll be like, this is fIF
44:47
seventeen years straight. He got me nothing, so I killed it. What's
44:52
gonna happen? So when they interview her on this show, was she in
44:57
prison or because I never got her anything, the jury saw fit to let
45:01
her go. Oh that's a good question. So like, is she is
45:06
she? Is she in one of those prison interview things glass on the phone
45:10
or is she on a sofa somewhere nice? No, No, she's in
45:14
the in person because it's a minimum like a medium security prison. Okay,
45:17
so she's like in person, but she's still wearing the jumpsuit, but she's
45:21
like the letter use utensils and things. Yeah, and then what's his name
45:27
from from Dateline, we'll interview her, Keith Morrison. Well, she'll tell
45:35
you, she'll explain why she said. She said it once, I don't
45:38
like Valentine's Day and she just tested you and every year you got her nothing,
45:43
and she put it in her murder book that she keeps every year on
45:46
the day another tally m m. And then she's like seventeen now and he
45:51
still hasn't bought me anything. So murder time. I disagree with you,
45:57
Raj. I don't think she's in prison. I think she's than that.
46:01
I think she knows. She's just gonna take Dan out. They're gonna go
46:05
for a hike. Oh yeah, oh yeah. And you know she's gonna
46:08
he had memory problem. He just he got lost. He couldn't find his
46:12
way home. It happens on the islands all the time. That makes so
46:15
much more sense the hikings. Or she's gonna rent like a luxury boat,
46:20
Yeah, a sailing trip for the day. Yeah, that's what I think
46:23
it'll be. That actually happened here a couple of years ago. Yeah,
46:30
that's why I don't hike or go on boats. That's not ever gonna happen
46:34
to me. So that's why you make sure your Valentine's Day stuff stays on
46:38
flat land. Well, I stay on flat land. That's probably the smart
46:47
way to go about it, Rajah, Just you know, for safety's sake.
46:52
So of the gifts that you got your girlfriend, is one of them
46:55
a hook to hang your laptop cord so you never lose it again, or
47:00
so she never misplaces it. We have a bin now, so everything goes
47:06
in the bin. The ring light, the mic, the headphones, the
47:10
laptop, court, everything goes in that bit and it's it's labeled treehouse.
47:19
I love it, so it won't happen again. I was going to text
47:22
you like three minutes before the show and go, can't find my court just
47:25
so you so you would do that all? First of all, not funny.
47:37
Second of all, who soon? So part of the reason I ask
47:45
you guys about to Valentine's Day is because, uh, did you hear I'm
47:50
not sure if you were listening near in our commercial break the spot I did
47:53
with Kerry Cook from Cook DFW Roofing and Restoration about who with the zoo happening
48:01
at the Fort Worth Zoo? No no, no, no, that that's
48:08
in how that's that's that's that's over. That's Halloween time. No no,
48:13
no, like who does it? Like Billy the kids sidekick, I would
48:19
go to that. I will go to that. Let's till here right now.
48:21
If whoever, whoever the new promotions and marketing director is at IHEARTDFW doesn't
48:25
steal that. They need to they need to be gone, and if if
48:30
need be, I will text Billy after the show and say we got a
48:32
we got a bit for you. In fact, I should probably do that
48:37
and then tell him he can ven mo me money. No, So you
48:40
know it's happened for years now. Around Valentine's Day, you'll have zoos around
48:45
the country. They'll let you uh purchase or name for for a donation.
48:51
You can name a cockroach or a gross critter in sort of a in remembrance
48:58
of an x or someone that you wrong in love and life. Well,
49:02
the fort Worth Zoo has decided to uh up the ante a little bit for
49:07
Valentine's Day. The zoo says, the fort Worth Zoo. The fort Worth
49:12
Zoo says, for ten dollars, they will symbolically dedicate a pound of zoo
49:15
pooh in the name of whomever you would like. It's part of the Zoo's
49:20
do some Good program. In addition to the dedication, you also get a
49:25
special certificate to send to your not so special person to let them know exactly
49:30
what you think of them. The donation goes to a good cause. It
49:35
goes to care and feeding of the Fort Worth Zoo seven thousand animals, which
49:38
is brilliant because then that means they're well fed for next year when it's time
49:43
to poo at the zoo again and bring in and shovel in more money?
49:51
Can they just call it the show's that's one of the alternative names for Yeah,
50:05
that's uh, that's clever. Okay, good for them. I don't.
50:07
I'm friends with every ex I've ever had, so I would I wouldn't.
50:13
I wouldn't need I wouldn't need it. Why, uh, thank you
50:28
Tray for asking the most important questions. Yeah, yeah, I'm friends with
50:32
I just we're cool. It just didn't work out, you know what,
50:37
Trey. Somewhere right now, there are couches being lined up waiting for the
50:45
butts of Roger's ex girlfriends to discuss all things raj and relationships and then and
50:52
truly what sort of friendships they have? I spoke to I spoke to one
50:57
of my exes the other day just to see how she's just got a new
50:59
job. So I just was calling to see how the new job was working.
51:02
Okay, wait, time out. Okay. Besides the fact that,
51:06
like your ex wife is your manager my agent agent? I'm sorry, y,
51:09
Yeah, manager is different than agent, Trey. Yeah, I have
51:15
a yeah, I have a different manager, but yes, she's my agent.
51:20
And then, uh, another one of my axes before her. Well,
51:22
hang on a second. So your ex wife is your agent, right,
51:25
yes, and agents get a commission off of what you book, right
51:30
correct? And is she also getting alimony? So she's double dipping you?
51:35
No, she's not. We do. We have a very amicable divorce.
51:37
It's amicable because she gets a commission from what she looks for. You.
51:44
Yeah, but she but she so my current girl. She gets ten percent
51:50
every time I So I lose twenty percent of my money every time because I
51:53
give ten percent to my current What. Yeah, when you're only you're only
52:02
supposed to tie to your church, you can't just keep throwing ten percent around.
52:08
Eventually you're going to run out. Yeah, No, of my agent
52:15
and then I and that's it. But my ex the other ex before my
52:19
ex wife is out in Phoenix and she just got a new job. So
52:22
I was checking on her and seeing how her new job is going. The
52:27
x before that, she's paralegal in Beverly Hill. So say, I talked
52:31
to her on Facebook every now and again to see how she's doing. She's
52:34
got a lovely new boyfriend and they seem to be very very happy. So
52:37
I don't know if you can see the look on Trey's face. Look,
52:42
he looks like he looks like he's inhaling someone else's well or maybe he's smelling
52:52
what you're shoveling. This is my poo at the zoo. Yeah, but
53:02
uh so, I just keep in touch. It's all just too too too
53:07
much to believe it's true. I wouldn't, I wouldn't lie to you,
53:12
like, are you friends with any of your exes? Define friend? Well,
53:22
they haven't killed you yet, vice versa. This feels like a natural
53:37
spot. Oh wait, do you want to hear the Dan deel one more
53:42
time? We still haven't guess you can desist from the Cowboys? Yeah?
53:45
Absolutely, all right, one more time in the treehouse. The brand new,
53:53
completely unofficial, totally unaffiliated with the Cowboys in every way but the Cowboys.
54:01
Dand out, Dallas Cowboys fans, it's time to ask yourselves a rock
54:07
hard question. Why stop it getting emotionally destroyed when you can get physically wrecked
54:13
by them boys? After a John Holmes size break, pretty Little Dan Incorporated
54:17
is back and just like the back of the bank bus, we are not
54:21
alone. We have an exciting announcement. ELD inc Is the very unofficial,
54:28
totally unsanctioned, extremely unsanitary dildo company of the Dallas Cowboys. That's right,
54:35
we're expanding into the sports world, because why should Taylor Swift and Oscar the
54:38
Grouch have all the fun when the Cowboys were on the trash eat first?
54:44
Right, So slip into your favorite Debbie does Dallas cosplay fit invite thirty one
54:47
strangers over wearing their official NFL team gimp gear. I embrace yourself for a
54:53
worse ass streaming than the Bills gave the Cowboys in Week fifteen. The Cowboys
55:00
and with the all New Cowboys, Dando, You're part of the action here,
55:06
Dak Prescott. Say all the right things to get you in the mood.
55:09
Then feel the rush of air on your face as his balls fly aimlessly
55:15
into the hands of a stranger in a packer's jersey. You see Michael Gallup
55:20
do what he does best, standing there and watching in hand. Don't just
55:24
see Tony Collard run full speed into the wrong hole. Eel it. See
55:30
Micah Parsons held by three linemen, which is actually a good thing, because
55:36
the Ai Michaeh Parsons hingry lion mode is still experimental and will eat more than
55:39
ass touch the tip of Layton vander esh is broken that he got while muff
55:45
hunting in Siberia. Like Mike McCarthy eating his post game dairy queen. With
55:52
the Cowboy dan Do, you too can taste defeat, so don't eat blue
55:55
waffles when you can suck on the Blue Star. With the Cowboys Dando,
56:01
you'll experience a whole year of action in one toy, with not one,
56:06
not two, but three special settings preseason hype, regular season teasing, and
56:14
postseason devastation. But wait, there's more. If you order now, we'll
56:21
add the law breaking off season mode for free while handcuffs last. The Cowboys
56:28
Dando from pld ink is full of proprietary technology, not our proprietary technology.
56:34
We stole it from the Titan submersible, so just like the Cowboys in the
56:37
playoffs, it can implode at any time, sucking you into an oblivion worse
56:43
than Caddyshack too. We just don't heave your pushwit material At PLD Inc.
56:47
We're going all in with the Cowboys Dando. We know what you're thinking,
56:53
How many years and how much money can this meltdown of a device cost?
56:57
Me price of a franchise quarterback who can't do any better than Tony Romo,
57:07
and just so we can make one more Cowboys in the playoffs. Joke that
57:10
Cowboys Dando won't last long, so call now the Cowboys Dando is in no
57:16
way, no, how, not ab all affiliated with the Dallas Cowboys.
57:19
It's trademarks. No, it's actual official sponsors or broadcast partners. It would
57:22
be more scene than the Cowboy Dando I think otherwise, please check with the
57:23
official dllas Cowboys team talking before spraining any sexual regiment in all the objects real
57:27
or imagine the Cowboys Dando. Unlike the Cowboys, this is a piece of
57:30
chrome plated hardware you can actually hoist at the end of the night. Another
57:34
fine product from p L d Inc. It's the best. That's the best.
57:47
That's what's fun. What am miss seeing your guys faces live? Actually
57:57
no, I'm not gonna see it again on Wednesday and we're gonna do some
58:00
stuff. Then we're gonna oh raj Are on Friday's episode of the Treehouse.
58:07
Brad Williams right, that's right, that is right, that is correct.
58:12
He's gonna be performing at the Majestic on Saturday. I was supposed to be
58:15
with him, but I will unfortunately not I'll be in San Antonio. But
58:20
the reason I was supposed to be on the show with him at the Majestic,
58:22
but I we're going to plan shoulder surgery from the car accident, but
58:27
they postponed it. But I already canceled. But he's more than happy when
58:30
I when I messaged him, he said absolutely would love to do the show.
58:34
And so he's ready on that is that is awesome. I'm looking for
58:37
what he's doing for Valentine's Day. And then I did speak to I know
58:42
we were supposed to have tone on last week, and I did speak to
58:45
him. Oh you did, I did, and I asked him more speaking
58:49
of you did mention earlier that he's good at skating. Turns out he's really
58:52
good at skating. Me. Well, he had a very very good reason,
58:57
and I was like, oh, completely understand. Uh yeah, his
59:00
neighbor got him drunk. Yeah, he had three bottles of wine, so
59:06
uh yeah, so I guess. I guess he and his neighbor Jerry did
59:09
their Valentine's celebration early old guys smart a couple of bottles of wine. At
59:22
home. Next thing, you know, tones rolling around in the living room
59:27
wearing skates. He got his own personal halftime show. Well, thank you
59:38
for hanging out inside the Treehouse with us today for our very first Treehouse Live
59:44
episode. Uh the episode in its normal form. Well uh still as long
59:52
as everything goes according to plan. Released later on today, just in time
59:55
for your drive home. Of course, if you're listening on your drive home
59:59
you already know, but gither away. Thanks for tuning in. As always,
1:00:01
we'll see you next time right here inside the Treehouse, and Happy Valentine's Day.