Latest / CLA+ / The Lion Within Us - Leadership for Christian Men - 756. I’m Just A Guy: Without Patience

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The Lion Within Us - Leadership for Christian Men - 756. I’m Just A Guy: Without Patience · CLA+

1:05
Chris Grainger: Welcome to the Land Within Us, a podcast serving Christian men who are hungry to be the leaders God intends you to be.
1:10
Chris Grainger: I'm your host, Chris Granger.
1:12
Chris Grainger: Let's jump in.
1:13
Chris Grainger: All right, guys.
1:14
Chris Grainger: Meet episode time.
1:15
Chris Grainger: Let's get into it.
1:16
Chris Grainger: Okay.
1:17
Chris Grainger: All right.
1:17
Chris Grainger: Scripture week this week is Ecclesiastes chapter 3, verse 11.
1:20
Chris Grainger: We talked about this one in the spiritual kickoff podcast, but hey, we're going to work over this verse one more time.
1:25
Chris Grainger: It says he has made everything appropriate in its time.
1:28
Chris Grainger: He has also set eternity in their heart without the possibility that mankind will find out the work which God has done from the beginning even to the end.
1:35
Chris Grainger: And so I took some time, unpacked that verse for you in the spiritual kickoff podcast.
1:39
Chris Grainger: Hopefully, gave you some things that you'll be encouraged by along the way.
1:42
Chris Grainger: Okay.
1:43
Chris Grainger: And again, we do the spiritual kickoff Monday through Friday at the Lion Within Us.
1:47
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1:48
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1:50
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1:56
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1:57
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2:00
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2:01
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2:03
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2:04
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2:07
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2:08
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2:10
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2:15
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2:19
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2:22
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2:24
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2:25
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2:27
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2:28
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2:31
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2:33
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2:34
Chris Grainger: So the lionwithin.us, click on the daily spiritual kickoff or daily SKO and jump right in.
2:40
Chris Grainger: All right.
2:41
Chris Grainger: So look, this one, fellas, is gonna be a this is not an easy one for me to write to when I wrote it.
2:46
Chris Grainger: It's definitely not an easy one for me to record, but here we go.
2:49
Chris Grainger: We won't talk about I'm just a guy without patience.
2:52
Chris Grainger: But lots of guys are like, nope.
2:54
Chris Grainger: They clicked on to the next podcast.
2:56
Chris Grainger: I get it, bro.
2:56
Chris Grainger: I get it.
2:57
Chris Grainger: Because patience doesn't come naturally, it just doesn't, and particularly for guys, uh, we want progress, we want results, and and and oh yeah, we want it right now.
3:05
Chris Grainger: I mean now, yesterday, right?
3:08
Chris Grainger: And whether we're waiting on God or family or or or life itself, and patience, man, when it creeps in, it robs us of our peace.
3:17
Chris Grainger: And usually when I started thinking about this one, patience isn't a time issue, patience is a trust issue.
3:24
Chris Grainger: And because when we lose patience, what we're really telling God is like, look, I don't trust your timing.
3:29
Chris Grainger: But in those waiting seasons, what if they're not punishments but preparation?
3:34
Chris Grainger: Okay.
3:35
Chris Grainger: And this is for every guy out there who is completely tired of waiting and ready to grow.
3:40
Chris Grainger: So we're gonna dive into it.
3:42
Chris Grainger: We're gonna look at a couple of days of this plan I wrote for the Bible app, and hopefully you'll be encouraged by it.
3:47
Chris Grainger: And look, we'll have a little bit of fun along the way.
3:48
Chris Grainger: How about that?
3:49
Chris Grainger: Okay, so look, we're at the gate, we're gonna look at the control trap.
3:52
Chris Grainger: And in Proverbs 19, verse 21 tells us many are the plans, many are the plans of a person's heart, but it's the Lord's purpose that prevails.
4:00
Chris Grainger: Okay, and I can't help but chuckle.
4:03
Chris Grainger: Man, I swear.
4:04
Chris Grainger: When people ask to pray for patience, I just thought laughing.
4:08
Chris Grainger: Because it happens uh all the time.
4:10
Chris Grainger: In fact, it happened in my family when we did a devotion in the morning.
4:14
Chris Grainger: I laughed at it and I was like, Oh, be careful here.
4:17
Chris Grainger: And because we did a lesson, the lesson was on Cain and Abel, and the focus was on how Cain acted rashly in choosing to kill his brother, right?
4:24
Chris Grainger: And that led us down a rapid trail that ended up on my family's side, and they want to pray for patience, right?
4:30
Chris Grainger: And I couldn't help but grin.
4:32
Chris Grainger: And and this caught their attention, and they were and they wanted to know, like, all right, daddy, well, why are you smiling?
4:38
Chris Grainger: And I told them, I said, look, fell uh ladies, because it was my girls, my little boys there too.
4:43
Chris Grainger: I said, when you ask God for patience, what he's gonna give you is plenty of opportunities to practice it.
4:49
Chris Grainger: Okay, I wasn't trying to discourage their prayer, but I couldn't find an argument against their desire either.
4:56
Chris Grainger: You know, I just I get it.
4:58
Chris Grainger: And if I'm honest, patience is something that I've always felt God, when he was putting all Chris together, he just forgot to add that when he when he when he was making me up.
5:08
Chris Grainger: Yeah, I'm just kidding.
5:09
Chris Grainger: But like, hey, maybe he gave me two doses of sarcasm and a touch of stubbornness and somehow left out that elusions, uh, the elusive patience gene, right?
5:18
Chris Grainger: So maybe that's what happened.
5:19
Chris Grainger: I don't know.
5:20
Chris Grainger: That's my wife, she'll probably be like, Amen.
5:22
Chris Grainger: And I've been avoiding praying for patience for a lot of my life.
5:26
Chris Grainger: Uh, and it's not that I dislike patience itself, but uh I knew uh really that the lessons that come with it usually involve situations that are beyond my control.
5:40
Chris Grainger: And maybe as I started thinking about this, that's the heart of the problem.
5:44
Chris Grainger: It's not so much a patience problem that I feared, but ultimately the loss of control.
5:50
Chris Grainger: And and I had a crash course uh in both, you know, fearing and loss and losing control uh last year, in July of last year, matter of fact.
6:01
Chris Grainger: And what happened, I had an accident that led me to that landed me in the ER with a broken ankle and surgery and plates and screws and recoveries and staph infections and more surgeries and and more, you know, the swelling just would never go down.
6:19
Chris Grainger: It just wouldn't on this, on this, on this ankle.
6:21
Chris Grainger: And in October of that year, I found myself back in the office.
6:25
Chris Grainger: And and the her the surgeon said some words, she may or may not have dropped the F-bomb in the office, but that's just you know, that's just part of it.
6:32
Chris Grainger: She's like, look, you gotta go to the hospital right now.
6:34
Chris Grainger: We need to do surgery tonight.
6:35
Chris Grainger: I'm like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, wait a minute now.
6:37
Chris Grainger: Well, are you serious?
6:38
Chris Grainger: She's like, Yep, I'm serious.
6:39
Chris Grainger: Like, you got a staph infection.
6:40
Chris Grainger: She was right, I had an immersive staph infection, and every all the hardware had to come out.
6:45
Chris Grainger: And I took two surgeries, it took four days, and then I just had to do what?
6:49
Chris Grainger: I had to wait.
6:51
Chris Grainger: I had to wait.
6:53
Chris Grainger: I had to just wait in that quiet hospital room for chest results and treatment plans and pick lines and all that stuff.
7:01
Chris Grainger: And God was showing me something.
7:03
Chris Grainger: He was showing me that surrender and control doesn't mean giving up.
7:09
Chris Grainger: He didn't want me to give up in that hospital room.
7:11
Chris Grainger: He wanted me to trust him.
7:13
Chris Grainger: And I had to release control to others.
7:15
Chris Grainger: And man, it was hard.
7:17
Chris Grainger: This is not easy.
7:18
Chris Grainger: But it was in that surrender that I found something pretty that's really surprised me.
7:23
Chris Grainger: This peace.
7:25
Chris Grainger: This peace.
7:27
Chris Grainger: I knew the situation was serious, for sure.
7:31
Chris Grainger: But I knew God had orchestrated every detail to place me exactly where I needed to be.
7:38
Chris Grainger: And the care to people that He had prepared beforehand.
7:41
Chris Grainger: And the longer I walk with Christ, the more I see this truth.
7:45
Chris Grainger: The moments that test my patience the most are often the ones that grow my faith the deepest.
7:53
Chris Grainger: Please hear that.
7:55
Chris Grainger: So I'm not sure, you know, what my daughters will experience as they pray for patients.
8:00
Chris Grainger: I don't know.
8:01
Chris Grainger: I really hope it doesn't land them in a hospital like it did their old dad.
8:05
Chris Grainger: But I do know this whatever opportunities God gives them to grow, if they lean into them fully, into him fully as well, they're gonna come out stronger on the other side.
8:19
Chris Grainger: And that's worth getting fired up about.
8:24
Chris Grainger: You know, about many are the plans of a person's heart, but the Lord's purpose that's what's gonna prevail.
8:31
Chris Grainger: So maybe start thinking today, like, where in your life do you struggle to give up that control?
8:35
Chris Grainger: I get it, man.
8:36
Chris Grainger: It's not an easy thing to think about, but it's definitely a useful exercise.
8:41
Chris Grainger: All right, guys, we'll take our first break and we'll be right back.
8:49
Chris Grainger: If you're like me, you don't need another book just sitting around collecting dust.
8:53
Chris Grainger: What I enjoy is something to help guide me when my feet hit the ground in the mornings.
8:59
Chris Grainger: And that is why we put together Unleashing the Lion Within.
9:02
Chris Grainger: It has honest stories, scripture you can apply, and simple steps to help you lead at home, at work, and everywhere in between.
9:11
Chris Grainger: So if you've been feeling stuck or scattered lately, you may find this resource encouraging.
9:18
Chris Grainger: Read a few pages.
9:20
Chris Grainger: Take one step and watch what God does with your obedience.
9:24
Chris Grainger: Hey, and if reading's tough for you right now, no problem.
9:28
Chris Grainger: The book is also available in audible version.
9:31
Chris Grainger: So you can listen on the go.
9:32
Chris Grainger: So if this sounds interesting, check out the lionwithin.us slash book or search for unleashing the lion within directly on Amazon.
9:43
Chris Grainger: So there's no pressure here, just a resource that many guys are finding helpful.
9:48
Chris Grainger: So grab the format that fits and take your next step.
9:54
Chris Grainger: Okay, fellas, let's let's keep going.
9:57
Chris Grainger: Now, I'm just a guy without patience.
9:59
Chris Grainger: Now let's talk about the weight of the waiting, okay?
10:02
Chris Grainger: Psalm 27, verse 14 says, wait for the Lord.
10:05
Chris Grainger: Be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.
10:08
Chris Grainger: So you get that twice.
10:09
Chris Grainger: You get to hear that that command twice.
10:11
Chris Grainger: And sometimes the hardest part of patience is what?
10:15
Chris Grainger: It's just the waiting, man.
10:17
Chris Grainger: It's just waiting.
10:18
Chris Grainger: And and most of us as guys, we can probably recognize this to be true.
10:29
Chris Grainger: And one of the worst feelings in the world is watching everyone and everything around us move forward while you feel stuck.
10:37
Chris Grainger: And I get it.
10:39
Chris Grainger: And as my first marriage failed, I entered a season of life that weighed heavy on me with every passing day.
10:45
Chris Grainger: It just did.
10:46
Chris Grainger: I still have my responsibilities as a father for sure.
10:49
Chris Grainger: I had two little toddlers running around 24-7, and there was plenty of activity for sure.
10:55
Chris Grainger: But my mind would drift.
10:58
Chris Grainger: It would.
11:00
Chris Grainger: And it would drift quite often to that painful thought that, man, you're gonna be alone forever.
11:05
Chris Grainger: And I remember that season of life.
11:07
Chris Grainger: I don't like to dwell on it, but I remember it.
11:10
Chris Grainger: And how those first weekends when my daughter would visit their mother, and they would usually go like on a Friday evening to a Sunday on Sunday afternoon.
11:18
Chris Grainger: And the house would go from laughing and giggles and frozen on repeat.
11:24
Chris Grainger: Man, let it go, Elsa, let it go.
11:26
Chris Grainger: But yeah, I can't.
11:27
Chris Grainger: I'm just joking, but seriously, it went from all that to silence.
11:34
Chris Grainger: And I'd sit there in the stillness and I would count the minutes until my little girls came home so life could feel quote unquote normal again.
11:48
Chris Grainger: That was a rough season, a lot of guys.
11:50
Chris Grainger: I'm not I'm not even gonna sit here and try to pretend and the least that was very challenging.
11:56
Chris Grainger: But I will tell you this, over time, I discovered something pretty pretty powerful.
12:03
Chris Grainger: It was in the silence and in the waiting and even in the hurt, okay, that God was shaping me the most.
12:12
Chris Grainger: He was teaching me firsthand how to wait on him.
12:17
Chris Grainger: And it's how it's really wild how when life gets quiet, the enemy turns up the volume.
12:25
Chris Grainger: He just does.
12:27
Chris Grainger: His playlist is loud, fellas.
12:30
Chris Grainger: He he loves to whisper lies.
12:32
Chris Grainger: He would whisper lies to me that my girls wouldn't come back, and I was a failure as a father, and that no woman would ever love me, and all the over and over and over and over.
12:41
Chris Grainger: And I I was tempted to just to just jump ahead when I was thinking about this and and share with you how God did move and he brought my wife, Rebecca, to my life.
12:54
Chris Grainger: But instead of doing that, let's stay right here where Psalm 2714 tells us.
12:59
Chris Grainger: He says, wait for the Lord.
13:01
Chris Grainger: So when I look back on that time of life, that season of life, I can see right now how he was shaping my heart and strengthening me in unique ways in that season.
13:10
Chris Grainger: He was preparing me to receive his blessings in his time.
13:14
Chris Grainger: Because if I had tried to force, you know, or act on my own, I would have likely missed what he was planning for me altogether.
13:23
Chris Grainger: And there's no sugar coating yet.
13:25
Chris Grainger: I'm not trying to gloss this over to waiting sucked.
13:27
Chris Grainger: It feels hard.
13:29
Chris Grainger: It stretched me in uncomfortable ways.
13:32
Chris Grainger: But maybe that's what you need to hear.
13:35
Chris Grainger: I don't know.
13:36
Chris Grainger: While you're being called to wait, it feels like God is silent.
13:41
Chris Grainger: But that's usually when he's working the most, man.
13:44
Chris Grainger: He's just working it.
13:45
Chris Grainger: And what if we stop viewing that waiting as a heavy weight and started seeing it as a divine opportunity?
13:52
Chris Grainger: And that was the moment.
13:54
Chris Grainger: That's the moment where he's going to strengthen us the most.
13:57
Chris Grainger: He's going to build us courage within us to withstand the enemy's attacks.
14:01
Chris Grainger: Because we have to remember this: that patience is not passive.
14:05
Chris Grainger: It's active faith.
14:07
Chris Grainger: It's active faith.
14:09
Chris Grainger: And it's trusting that even when you can't see movement, God is still working behind the scenes, man.
14:15
Chris Grainger: So if you're in the middle of a long wait right now, take heart.
14:19
Chris Grainger: Because delay doesn't mean denial.
14:22
Chris Grainger: It doesn't.
14:23
Chris Grainger: His time is not off.
14:25
Chris Grainger: He's not ignoring you.
14:26
Chris Grainger: He's investing in you.
14:29
Chris Grainger: And our job isn't to force the door open, it's to stay faithful until that moment he tells us to move, guys.
14:38
Chris Grainger: So maybe think about this.
14:39
Chris Grainger: What season of waiting are you currently in right now?
14:43
Chris Grainger: And how has, and as you're in it, how does God shape you through seasons of stillness and waiting before?
14:52
Chris Grainger: Because usually that you know looking back is very helpful for moving forward, okay?
14:56
Chris Grainger: All right, guys.
14:57
Chris Grainger: Take our next break, we'll be right back.
15:03
Chris Grainger: If there's one habit that can change your home, it's this when a husband prays with his wife, not because it's a magic formula, but because it recenters your marriage under God's authority and care.
15:14
Chris Grainger: And let's be honest, a lot of guys want to do it, but most don't know how to start without it feeling awkward.
15:20
Chris Grainger: Maybe you tried it before and it felt forced.
15:23
Chris Grainger: Or maybe you've never tried it because you don't even know what to say.
15:26
Chris Grainger: Or maybe you're thinking, man, I'm not a pastor, I'm just a guy.
15:30
Chris Grainger: And that's why we created this guide.
15:32
Chris Grainger: It's our how to pray with your wife.
15:35
Chris Grainger: Simple guide.
15:36
Chris Grainger: It's biblical, it's practical, and it's designed to help you start praying with your wife in a way that actually feels natural.
15:44
Chris Grainger: So it's a five-section guide and it gives you a simple framework to get started.
15:49
Chris Grainger: Okay, it makes sure everything is grounded in scripture and it also has a powerful PDF that you can pull up whenever you need, especially when things get off, because they're gonna get off.
16:00
Chris Grainger: That's normal.
16:01
Chris Grainger: So this is all about reclaiming your marriage and reclaiming the spiritual leadership reigns of your home.
16:07
Chris Grainger: Because praying with your wife is one of the strongest ways to fight for unity, to build trust, and to write the ship when life starts to pull you off a course.
16:18
Chris Grainger: So if you're ready, get access today at the lionwithin.us slash guides.
16:24
Chris Grainger: That's the lionwithin.usguides.
16:28
Chris Grainger: And start unleashing the lion within at home by leading your marriage through prayer.
16:36
Chris Grainger: Well, let's keep digging into it around this idea of I'm just a guy without patience.
16:40
Chris Grainger: Now we're up to anger.
16:42
Chris Grainger: What about when anger takes over?
16:43
Chris Grainger: Now, James tells us in chapter one, verse 19 and 20, and everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to anger.
16:49
Chris Grainger: Okay, that's a that's a very good uh verse because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires, period.
16:55
Chris Grainger: And it's been my experience that impatience and anger, they're like close cousins, man.
17:01
Chris Grainger: They just are.
17:02
Chris Grainger: And which whenever one shows up first, the other one's gonna be that pretty soon after to follow.
17:08
Chris Grainger: And and I I remember you know a great example of this uh was when I saw it firsthand, my little three-year-old boy.
17:16
Chris Grainger: And he wants to help with chores on the farm, right?
17:20
Chris Grainger: And if you've ever been around toddlers, you know what I'm talking about.
17:24
Chris Grainger: You understand, you understand.
17:25
Chris Grainger: Because you understand that their help usually is not helpful, but I love them.
17:30
Chris Grainger: And take uh take muck and stalls, for instance.
17:32
Chris Grainger: So we got horses, means we have stalls, which means we have a lot of horse poop, okay?
17:36
Chris Grainger: And if we got a lot of horse poop, means you gotta get horse poop out of the stall because it's not healthy for horse for horses to stand in their poop all the time, and it's just it just brings a lot of bad stuff.
17:45
Chris Grainger: So you gotta clean the stalls every day.
17:47
Chris Grainger: So he sees me regularly with a pitchfork in my hand, and instantly he's thinking, I want to be like dad.
17:54
Chris Grainger: I want to be like I want to be just like him.
17:56
Chris Grainger: And within seconds, man, he's got his little pitchfork, and it's going, he's going to town.
18:01
Chris Grainger: And he's scooping it up.
18:02
Chris Grainger: And I'm gonna tell you right now, I I I I'm not saying this just because he's my boy, he's getting to be pretty doggone good right now.
18:10
Chris Grainger: But when he started, he wasn't.
18:12
Chris Grainger: And even usually it's even funny.
18:15
Chris Grainger: Lots of times I wear a rucksack just to wear a ruck when I'm out there working in the barn just to give extra work, just an extra workout.
18:22
Chris Grainger: You know, I'm out there feeding horses for an hour or so.
18:24
Chris Grainger: Why not get a little extra burn?
18:26
Chris Grainger: So I've noticed uh recently that what I do when I have that on, he's going, he goes and gets his little book packed, which has got a line on it because he's awesome.
18:35
Chris Grainger: And uh he'll put that on while he's muck installed.
18:37
Chris Grainger: So it's really cool how that works.
18:39
Chris Grainger: And what but when it first started, like he got the scooping part down, it was the lifting, lifting it up and getting into the wheelbarrow part that was tricky for him.
18:50
Chris Grainger: And since he was so small, he would he would try to hoist that pitchfork that was full of muck, you know, up to a height that was just more than his little arms handle.
19:00
Chris Grainger: And what happened?
19:01
Chris Grainger: Well, usually half of what he was trying to throw into the wheelbarrow dumps right back onto the floor or in the stall in the middle of the hall or whatever, wherever it was.
19:08
Chris Grainger: And what did that mean for me?
19:09
Chris Grainger: That meant double work.
19:11
Chris Grainger: Just did.
19:12
Chris Grainger: Not only did I had to clean up the stall, but now I had to clear up what he's dropped behind, right?
19:16
Chris Grainger: That just and then all the extra pine shaves and everything that inevitably he brings that he that he would do with that.
19:25
Chris Grainger: And usually, sadly, uh that was often a point when my frustration would start rising and my tone would start shifting.
19:33
Chris Grainger: And when that happens, I would see a change in him pretty quickly.
19:38
Chris Grainger: His his posture would change, his shoulders would slump, his smile would fade away, and the light in his his eyes would just disappear.
19:47
Chris Grainger: Because in that moment, my impatience with his learning was turning into anger.
19:55
Chris Grainger: And I hate it, man.
19:56
Chris Grainger: I hate even admitting it, but you guys listen to your lines, I'm just gonna be real with you.
20:00
Chris Grainger: And and I I also share it because I know I'm not the only one who's been there.
20:05
Chris Grainger: Because when I get so focused on the task at hand that anything slows me when stuff that like gets in my way, it feels like an obstacle.
20:13
Chris Grainger: And I forget what matters most.
20:15
Chris Grainger: In that moment was the heart beside me, man.
20:18
Chris Grainger: It wasn't the work in front of me, it was the heart beside me.
20:22
Chris Grainger: And the last thing I want is for my son to think his dead doesn't value his effort.
20:27
Chris Grainger: Yeah, that's exactly the experience that he was having, that he was seeing firsthand when my impatience started to take over.
20:35
Chris Grainger: You see how that works?
20:37
Chris Grainger: It's very interesting.
20:39
Chris Grainger: And it strikes me when I reflect on the words of James, uh, of how he added in that verse, slow to anger alongside quick to listen and slow to speak.
20:54
Chris Grainger: Because the first two go together, man, that's like peanut butter dilly time right there, bro.
20:57
Chris Grainger: It just does.
20:58
Chris Grainger: Quick to quick to listen, slow to speak.
21:01
Chris Grainger: So why did he add anger?
21:03
Chris Grainger: I think the Holy Spirit was crystal clear with James in that moment.
21:08
Chris Grainger: Because if he had left that part out and just told us to be quick to listen and slow to speak, we may have missed the deeper truth.
21:15
Chris Grainger: And it's I think it's this for me.
21:18
Chris Grainger: When I act out of my own anger, rather than in God's righteousness, I'm outside of his will.
21:24
Chris Grainger: That's it.
21:25
Chris Grainger: And when I let anger drive, I'm no longer reflecting the heart of Christ within me.
21:31
Chris Grainger: That it's really that simple.
21:33
Chris Grainger: And just as impatience and anger are first cousins, if we believe that, then guess what?
21:39
Chris Grainger: Love and anger are complete strangers.
21:43
Chris Grainger: One cannot exist with the other.
21:45
Chris Grainger: And every time I let anger take over, I trade the opportunity to build up to build up for the impulse to tear it down.
21:56
Chris Grainger: So if you find yourself in a situation where anger rises, look man, it's gonna happen.
22:01
Chris Grainger: It may happen today.
22:03
Chris Grainger: And particularly, you don't listen to this podcast, it probably will happen today.
22:06
Chris Grainger: Take a purposeful pause, breathe.
22:11
Chris Grainger: And remember that the your tone that comes next might be shaping someone's heart more than you words, than your words ever could.
22:19
Chris Grainger: I mean, I had to learn this from my little boy.
22:22
Chris Grainger: Because the truth is this, guys, righteousness is never born out of rage.
22:27
Chris Grainger: It's revealed through restraint.
22:29
Chris Grainger: And when we choose patience over anger, we create space for God to show up, to soften our heart, and remind everyone involved, including us, that love always wins and anger never can.
22:44
Chris Grainger: So start thinking about maybe what triggers your anger when things don't happen you know fast enough for you.
22:50
Chris Grainger: Okay.
22:50
Chris Grainger: Or how can you pause before you start reacting so you can so that you respond with patience more more naturally.
22:58
Chris Grainger: Alright guys, we're gonna take our last break, we'll be right back.
23:03
Chris Grainger: If you've ever opened the Bible and had the thought, where do I even start?
23:08
Chris Grainger: Brother, you're not alone.
23:10
Chris Grainger: I've had those moments all too often.
23:13
Chris Grainger: And I found that having a guide was helpful.
23:16
Chris Grainger: And that's why we created the I'm Just a Guide series on the Bible app.
23:21
Chris Grainger: They're short, they're honest, and they help you read scripture and walk it out.
23:27
Chris Grainger: And these plans speak to the real stuff that we're wrestling with as men, like marriage, anxiety, loneliness, shame, pornography, and so much more.
23:38
Chris Grainger: Now do this all without pretending or piling on a bunch of self-help nonsense.
23:43
Chris Grainger: And lots of guys are using them in their small groups, and they're helping to spark honest conversations and take simple next steps in their discipleship journey.
23:54
Chris Grainger: So if that sounds helpful, check them out at thelionwithin.us slash U version.
23:59
Chris Grainger: So that's Y-O-U-V-E-R-S-I-O-N.
24:04
Chris Grainger: Or just open up your Bible app and search for the Lion Within Us.
24:08
Chris Grainger: And it's my hope that these reflections will encourage you in just a few minutes and help you walk with Him all day long.
24:19
Chris Grainger: Guys, I thought we would end this podcast on the thought of the humility of patience.
24:28
Chris Grainger: And in Philippians 2, it tells us do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit.
24:34
Chris Grainger: Rather than humility, value others above yourselves.
24:37
Chris Grainger: Wonderful verse.
24:38
Chris Grainger: Love it.
24:40
Chris Grainger: And I really started thinking about that verse.
24:43
Chris Grainger: And for me, a large part of my career, I worked in sales and in business development.
24:48
Chris Grainger: It was pretty fun.
24:49
Chris Grainger: And I loved what I did.
24:50
Chris Grainger: And I found it at times frustrating when working with people who had a particular style of presentation.
24:59
Chris Grainger: And I used to call it, I don't know what you guys call it, I called it feature and benefit puking.
25:02
Chris Grainger: That's just what I called it.
25:03
Chris Grainger: It's definitely not the prettiest term.
25:05
Chris Grainger: But hang with me, hopefully you'll pick up what I'm putting down.
25:08
Chris Grainger: And then their approach was built on, you know, was built differently than mine.
25:13
Chris Grainger: Mine was built on service.
25:15
Chris Grainger: You know, I really wanted to learn everything I could about the customers' challenges, where they were.
25:19
Chris Grainger: I asked a lot of clarifying questions.
25:21
Chris Grainger: I feel I it usually with a sales call, me, felt more like a doctor's appointment than anything because I was just trying to understand and identify the solutions that will make a difference for them.
25:31
Chris Grainger: Because I wanted to get down to the root cause, not the symptoms.
25:36
Chris Grainger: They are indicators, but they're not, but I wanted to understand the root cause and really make every moment of my time with them valuable.
25:44
Chris Grainger: Okay.
25:45
Chris Grainger: And that meant quite often that I would not showcase every flashy bell and whistle of the product line or the offering that we had.
25:52
Chris Grainger: Because if it didn't add value to their situation, then guess what?
25:55
Chris Grainger: I just put it on the shelf.
25:57
Chris Grainger: I just put it on the shelf.
25:58
Chris Grainger: And I did this more than once.
26:00
Chris Grainger: And I left a meeting one time with a coworker, and they said they were like, hey, why didn't you tell them about that, man?
26:06
Chris Grainger: You missed the opportunity.
26:08
Chris Grainger: You should have showed them.
26:09
Chris Grainger: What do you, what do you, what you, Chris?
26:11
Chris Grainger: You've done this before.
26:13
Chris Grainger: And usually, nine times out of ten, the PO would come before the day was done, right?
26:20
Chris Grainger: Because I knew it was important to the customer.
26:23
Chris Grainger: But then I've also been on sales calls because I was in sales management for a long time as well.
26:28
Chris Grainger: Test your patience.
26:29
Chris Grainger: And there were people, there were salespeople who took different approaches.
26:33
Chris Grainger: So in their minds, they already had the answer to every problem the customer would ever face.
26:38
Chris Grainger: And rather than asking questions or learning about the customer's needs, they filled every meeting or reviewing every feature and every benefit and every bell and every whistle.
26:47
Chris Grainger: Really, what they're trying to do, they were trying to prove their own worth and their own greatness.
26:51
Chris Grainger: And the customers would just smile and nod, mm-hmm.
26:54
Chris Grainger: Yep, I can get it.
26:55
Chris Grainger: Yep.
26:55
Chris Grainger: But it was obvious.
26:56
Chris Grainger: They checked out, man.
26:58
Chris Grainger: I've seen I've been in meetings where the customers were checked out well before the presentation ended.
27:03
Chris Grainger: And what frustrated me the most wasn't really their approach to selling, which it was kind of frustrating.
27:08
Chris Grainger: To me, more what more importantly was their uh the selfish ambition that was driving behind it.
27:14
Chris Grainger: Because it was thought, it was pride and full on display.
27:18
Chris Grainger: And it was ugly, man.
27:19
Chris Grainger: It was ugly.
27:20
Chris Grainger: And the image stuck with me for years because it shaped with me, shaped really how I view relationships professionally and personally.
27:30
Chris Grainger: And taking the time to ask questions, to listen, and truly care about someone else's perspective is rare these days.
27:38
Chris Grainger: And when we do it, we're not we're communicating through our actions that we value them more than ourselves.
27:44
Chris Grainger: And that's a powerful expression of humility.
27:47
Chris Grainger: And people have mentioned this to me about a podcast and how how I podcast differently than other podcasters.
27:53
Chris Grainger: Many podcasters step all over their guests.
27:56
Chris Grainger: They just do.
27:57
Chris Grainger: They want to insert their point, they want to get to what they're important to them.
28:00
Chris Grainger: And while I try to navigate a conversation that's going to be useful and beneficial to you as a listener, I ultimately, with every podcast guest that I have on, no matter if it's a guest for a Wednesday episode or a member spotlight, my goal is to honor, just honor the guest, period.
28:17
Chris Grainger: And sometimes that just means the best thing Chris can do is shut up, just be still and just let these guys talk.
28:24
Chris Grainger: So I again sometimes when it comes to this idea of patience, you know, talking about from a work standpoint, it's one thing.
28:35
Chris Grainger: But for me, it's hard to do this and to live it out with the people that are closest to me.
28:41
Chris Grainger: Maybe you felt that too, you know, because think about this.
28:43
Chris Grainger: You see your family every day.
28:45
Chris Grainger: You know you see them at meals and at week on the weekends and in the hallway.
28:49
Chris Grainger: I mean, all these different areas, you see your family.
28:51
Chris Grainger: And you sometimes you may think there's nothing new that you can learn about them.
28:55
Chris Grainger: But seeing someone and valuing them above ourselves, that's two different things.
29:03
Chris Grainger: And it's very interesting how much Jesus shows us about this and how patient he was with his disciples.
29:10
Chris Grainger: I just laugh about it when I think about how patient Jesus was.
29:13
Chris Grainger: I mean, he didn't talk about someone who could have just smacked them.
29:15
Chris Grainger: He didn't.
29:17
Chris Grainger: I mean, he spent time with them every day.
29:19
Chris Grainger: These guys doubted Jesus.
29:21
Chris Grainger: They argued among themselves, and they quite often, more than once, missed the very lessons he was trying to teach them.
29:29
Chris Grainger: Yeah, what did Jesus do?
29:31
Chris Grainger: He just stayed calm.
29:32
Chris Grainger: He engaged him directly.
29:34
Chris Grainger: And he asked questions, even if you already knew the answer to.
29:40
Chris Grainger: And it makes me wonder, why did James, or not James, Jesus, why did Jesus ask questions he already knew the answers to?
29:50
Chris Grainger: Maybe it's something as simple as this.
29:54
Chris Grainger: When you see someone ask a question with genuine humility, you're you're saying I value your thoughts.
30:04
Chris Grainger: That's it.
30:05
Chris Grainger: I value your thoughts.
30:06
Chris Grainger: I see you.
30:08
Chris Grainger: I really want to care about your perspective.
30:10
Chris Grainger: And maybe for us, that's the person that's the invitation, is to let humility shape our patience, to slow down long enough to see others through the lens of service instead of the self.
30:29
Chris Grainger: The one who never demanded to be heard, but always made time to listen, to love, and to lead with grace.
30:37
Chris Grainger: And because when humility and patience, I'm sorry, but when humility meets patience, that's I'd rather say that, pride loses its footing, man.
30:48
Chris Grainger: It just does.
30:49
Chris Grainger: And Christ's character takes its place.
30:51
Chris Grainger: So maybe think about how have how often do you listen to understand instead of listening to respond?
30:58
Chris Grainger: That's a challenging one.
30:59
Chris Grainger: Straight up, it's challenging.
31:01
Chris Grainger: And if patience has been a struggle for you, I really pray and hope that this podcast, again, it's about 30 minutes long, maybe.
31:09
Chris Grainger: Hopefully, this has been an encouragement to at least know that you're not alone.
31:14
Chris Grainger: God isn't disappointed in your frustration.
31:16
Chris Grainger: Okay, He's inviting you to trust Him more deeply.
31:20
Chris Grainger: And every time you choose to wait well, you're growing stronger as a man He's designed you to be.
31:26
Chris Grainger: So that's my prayer for you.
31:27
Chris Grainger: And look, if you like this and you want to do this like this whole plan yourself with others, go to the Bible app.
31:34
Chris Grainger: Open up the Bible app, search for I'm Just a Guy Without Patience, start it.
31:38
Chris Grainger: It's a five-day plan.
31:40
Chris Grainger: If you start day one, for instance, and you go for day one, there's the little quiz.
31:45
Chris Grainger: If you do the little quiz, what are they do?
31:47
Chris Grainger: It will put you into an email and you'll get an email every day that walks with you through the five-day plan.
31:53
Chris Grainger: So, and by the way, that's the way for most of our plans.
31:56
Chris Grainger: There's a quiz on the front of our plans, and you do the quiz, like a Christian leader assessment we have, when you finish that, that enrolls you into the to the the the five-day plan to the emails that walk with you through the plan.
32:11
Chris Grainger: So hopefully you'll be encouraged by that, okay?
32:14
Chris Grainger: So, I mean, think about that, and then ultimately think about where in your life are you struggling to trust God's timing right now.
32:19
Chris Grainger: And we all have these areas in our life, like none of it, none of it's perfect, but hopefully you've learned some things through this podcast or some of the resources that have been useful and will help you in this season of life.
32:30
Chris Grainger: Other than that, guys, the linewithin.us is where you find all our resources.
32:34
Chris Grainger: We'd love for you to connect with us over there.
32:36
Chris Grainger: The Daily SK, which I've already mentioned, the Lion's Den, put in an application for the leadership mastermind.
32:41
Chris Grainger: All those are great ways to get connected with us right there at thelinewithin.us.
32:46
Chris Grainger: I mentioned a Bible app as well.
32:48
Chris Grainger: Open up the Bible app, uh, search for the Lion Within Us.
32:51
Chris Grainger: Follow the page on the Bible app as well, and you have can be connected and you'll be updated every time a plan comes out, you'll you'll get notified.
32:59
Chris Grainger: You'll be the first one to know, hey, this plan just drop for the line within us, and you may be encouraged by it.
33:04
Chris Grainger: Other than that, fellas, we could definitely use your support.
33:06
Chris Grainger: We have uh our ministry up and going, so we're looking for monthly donors and supporters of the line within us.
33:12
Chris Grainger: So if you listen to the podcast at this length and you've made it, you can you're actually hearing the words I'm saying right now, you're all in.
33:19
Chris Grainger: I mean, you're all in on the line.
33:21
Chris Grainger: Help us out.
33:22
Chris Grainger: I would simply ask, just help us out.
33:24
Chris Grainger: No matter how small or how big, it could be five bucks, ten bucks, a hundred bucks, a thousand bucks, five thousand bucks tomorrow, whatever that you can fit or you feel like the spirit is leading you to help support our ministry would be greatly appreciated because we're doing the hard work.
33:41
Chris Grainger: We picked a hard vertical.
33:43
Chris Grainger: Go chasing Christian men.
33:45
Chris Grainger: That's not easy.
33:46
Chris Grainger: And we're building a lot, we've already built a lot, and we are continuing to build a lot of resources in the future to help men in their discipleship journey.
33:55
Chris Grainger: So look, we need your help in doing it.
33:57
Chris Grainger: We're 100% volunteer right now, and that's great for a hobby.
34:02
Chris Grainger: But to really lean in to do this, we need some full-time focus and we need your help.
34:07
Chris Grainger: So, the lionwithin.us, you'll find ways to support us right there.
34:11
Chris Grainger: You can do the lionwithin.us slash pursuit if you want to look at that.
34:15
Chris Grainger: The pursuit of one more is what we call a lot of the things we're doing.
34:18
Chris Grainger: And we would love for you to come alongside and be a partner with this.
34:21
Chris Grainger: And you're like, Chris, man, there's I just can't do it right now.
34:25
Chris Grainger: Look, go to go to that page and pray for us.
34:29
Chris Grainger: So what we do, we put out a quarterly prayer request of here's where where God has moved over the last quarter.
34:36
Chris Grainger: Here's where He's we feel like He's asking us to do next.
34:39
Chris Grainger: And here are some personal items that I just would covet your prayers over.
34:43
Chris Grainger: Lots of times there are things around my wife or my children or just our farm, whatever it may be.
34:47
Chris Grainger: But I just invite you into it.
34:49
Chris Grainger: I mean, doing this work, it's not easy because spiritual warfare is real, and we need your prayers straight up.
34:54
Chris Grainger: Not even gonna try to pretend we can do this on our own.
34:56
Chris Grainger: So the lionwithin.us is where you find all that stuff at.
34:59
Chris Grainger: Okay, guys.
35:00
Chris Grainger: All right.
35:00
Chris Grainger: Well, that's it.
35:01
Chris Grainger: Get after it.
35:02
Chris Grainger: Come back next time.
35:03
Chris Grainger: Our front for our Friday episode is gonna be a little bit different this week, uh, but I think it's one that you're gonna like.
35:09
Chris Grainger: Definitely was excited to record it.
35:11
Chris Grainger: I love the guests, and I think it's gonna be an encouragement to you as do as we move forward with Alliance.
35:16
Chris Grainger: So, anyway, guys, get after it.
35:18
Chris Grainger: Have a good day.
35:19
Chris Grainger: Thanks for hanging out.
35:19
Chris Grainger: Give us a rating review, that stuff helps.
35:21
Chris Grainger: Share the episode out with other people, and other than that, just keep on leashing the Lion Within.
35:29
Chris Grainger: Let's just say it out loud.
35:30
Chris Grainger: Marriage is one of the greatest gifts that God can give a man, and one of the most consistent places where we can feel unsure of what we're doing.
35:38
Chris Grainger: Even the strongest marriages have moments where you look at your wife and you think, you know what?
35:42
Chris Grainger: I love you.
35:43
Chris Grainger: I'm so committed to you.
35:44
Chris Grainger: But right now, I have no idea what I should do next.
35:47
Chris Grainger: And that's why we launched something new inside the lion within us community.
35:51
Chris Grainger: It's our very first support group.
35:53
Chris Grainger: And it's for husbands, and we're calling it committed and occasionally confused.
35:58
Chris Grainger: This isn't just a place for men in crisis.
36:00
Chris Grainger: So if you're there, hey, you're welcome.
36:03
Chris Grainger: This is for any man who refuses to coast and wants to take his marriage from good to great.
36:09
Chris Grainger: So inside, you'll find an active chat and a feed, an honest conversation, and brotherhood that says, hey, you're not alone.
36:17
Chris Grainger: We've been there.
36:18
Chris Grainger: Unless we bring this to God and grow.
36:21
Chris Grainger: And we're also doing a monthly couples night where your wife is invited because we're not letting the world set the agenda for our homes.
36:28
Chris Grainger: Now, if you want access to this support group, it's very simple.
36:32
Chris Grainger: Go to thelionwithin.us and join the Lions Dan.
36:36
Chris Grainger: Okay, that's the LionWithin.us.
36:38
Chris Grainger: Start your 30-day free trial of the Lions Dan community, and boom, you have instant access to the committed and occasionally confused support group.
36:48
Chris Grainger: We'll see you inside the den.