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Breaking Free: PMDD, Perimenopause, and Healing Your Past · Is Your Way In Your Way?

0:25
Cassandra: Good day out there to all my listeners and I'd like to welcome you to Is your Way In your Way podcast, and I'm your host, cassandra Crawley-Mayo.
0:34
Cassandra: And for those new listeners out there, just know that's also the title of my book, is your Way In your Way, and we like to talk about topics related to what I say personal improvement, business improvement or development and at times, this will enable you to self-reflect.
0:53
Cassandra: And I also say that I'm prayerful that these podcasts at least one of these podcasts will enable you to say you know what?
1:05
Cassandra: I think this is the issue.
1:07
Cassandra: I think this is why I'm stuck.
1:08
Cassandra: I think this is why I'm stuck.
1:09
Cassandra: I think this is why I've always wanted to be an entrepreneur, but something's stopping me.
1:15
Cassandra: I know I need to get out of a toxic relationship, but I'm stuck with that.
1:18
Cassandra: I know that I need to move, I need to forgive somebody, just a gamut of things that is preventing you from living your best life on your terms, preventing you from living your best life on your terms.
1:33
Cassandra: And while we're here living, we want to make sure that we're living our ordained purpose, whatever your gift is.
1:40
Cassandra: So it's time for us to move forward and start doing the things that we know within our hearts or believe that this is something God would have us to do.
1:47
Cassandra: However, you're stuck.
1:48
Cassandra: So today we're going to talk about a topic that is unbelievable to me.
1:54
Cassandra: It's titled what you may not know about PMDD or perimenopause.
2:02
Cassandra: Now some of you say, well, what is PMDD?
2:05
Cassandra: Well, we're going to find out, and the person that's going to talk to us about that name is Chloe, and I say Jimenez, it was just Spanish, peters and Chloe, I'd like to welcome you to.
2:18
Cassandra: Is your Way In your Way?
2:20
Cassandra: Podcast.
2:21
Chloe: Thank you, Cassandra.
2:22
Chloe: It's so cool to be here with you.
2:25
Cassandra: Yeah, I'm feeling the same way.
2:26
Cassandra: I'm looking forward to diving in guys, because this is a topic that I'm saying you probably don't even know about it or even know what it stands for.
2:35
Cassandra: But before we delve into this, I want to read a little bit about Chloe so that you can get some what I would call understand her a little bit before we dive in.
2:47
Cassandra: So Chloe is a transformational hypnotherapist and trauma informed coach who helps women worldwide break free from the subconscious patterns behind PMDD premenstrual dysphoric disorder and we're going to elaborate on that perimenopause and the lingering effects of toxic relationships.
3:11
Cassandra: Combining her medical background with a profound knowledge of the subconscious, chloe specializes in rewiring the mind and nervous system to unlock true self-worth, inner peace and fulfilling relationship.
3:28
Cassandra: Intrigued by how Chloe transformed trauma into a success blueprint, this interview is going to reveal her unique approach to healing and empowerment, paving the way for a thriving, purpose-filled life.
3:43
Cassandra: Wow, this is so cool.
3:45
Cassandra: Hey, listeners, I've experienced what she's going to talk about, so I know like when I wrote my book, I said many of you will be able to see yourself in the book, but this time you're going to also see yourself in this podcast.
4:01
Cassandra: So, chloe, before we, let me ask you this what was life prior to your journey, before you went through your journey of heartbreak and healing?
4:14
Cassandra: What was going on with you prior to that that your heartbreak and healing?
4:17
Cassandra: What's what happened?
4:20
Chloe: So well.
4:20
Chloe: I struggled with mental health issues since my teens, so actually I didn't even know about PMDD back then.
4:28
Chloe: Actually I didn't even know about PMDD back then.
4:34
Chloe: I was diagnosed with um chronic fatigue at 15 years old, then clinical depression at 17 and they prescribed me antidepressants and then I went to med school and I was very much down that whole you know the serotonin model and it's, you know, imbalance and I really took all of that on and it wasn't until I was left by the.
4:54
Chloe: I call him the sperm donor of my three children because he is absent and that's what he now will remain as the sperm donor left 23 He -year-old a Swedish girl.
5:04
Chloe: He disappeared.
5:05
Chloe: I was pregnant and I was absolutely heart heartbroken and I just remember sitting on my green sofa watching my two baby boys under the age of two and just thinking, because I just couldn't sleep.
5:20
Chloe: I was a complete wreck, you know, obsessing over where he was, what they were doing, and just in denial, really, really just wanting my life back on track.
5:29
Chloe: And I was having these thoughts and I thought do you know what?
5:34
Chloe: You're doing this to yourself, because you actually have choice over what to think and you are choosing to go onto social media and look at what they're doing, and I realized that I was, I was a victim of, of my own behavior, and I had this thought that went through my mind that was who's going to want you?
5:54
Chloe: What will become of your life?
5:56
Chloe: Who's going to want you with three children?
5:58
Chloe: And right there, like, don't you dare?
6:00
Chloe: Because I realized I had choice and I could see if I continued to believe that the effect on my children would be catastrophic, that they would feel that they were a burden to my happiness.
6:12
Chloe: And so I went down a rabbit hole of learning about the subconscious mind and personal growth and deciding that I had to become the best version of me.
6:24
Chloe: I had to.
6:25
Chloe: These kids had to know that they were enough and they only had me to look at.
6:28
Chloe: And so I started to really study the subconscious mind and the laws of the universe and the rules of the mind.
6:44
Cassandra: And then I came across this training for rapid transformational therapy, which is what I do now the hypnotherapy.
6:47
Cassandra: Let me ask you, Chloe, real quick have you gone to medical school yet?
6:50
Cassandra: That's all this before, yeah.
6:52
Chloe: So I had gone to medical school and then and qualified as a dentist because I just so.
7:02
Chloe: I grew up with a dad who was, like you will be a doctor or a lawyer, and so I had my choice taken away from me and actually when I went to the subconscious root cause of the depression, from me, and actually when I went to the subconscious root cause of the depression, I realized that it was because of that story I was hearing all the time.
7:15
Chloe: The child in me, my inner childhood, concluded there's something wrong with you because he needs you to be this in order for you to be significant.
7:23
Chloe: And so I concluded that I was bad.
7:27
Chloe: There was something innately wrong with me, because I'd hear him say to my sister well, you're going to be an actress, you could be this, you can't have the choice.
7:34
Chloe: And so and this is what we do, you know, we take on 95% of our beliefs by the time we're seven years old and that is our blueprint and their misperceptions of a child.
7:45
Chloe: Right their conclusions a child cannot think that their pair, you know they don't have a logical critical factor developed by them, so they're just concluding all the time.
7:55
Chloe: So trauma is not just what was done to you.
7:58
Chloe: Trauma is what wasn't done to you.
8:00
Chloe: You weren't loved unconditionally, or you didn't feel that you were loved unconditionally.
8:05
Chloe: And as a highly sensitive person, which one in four of us is, and you see, that's, that's what is genetic, this highly sensitive person's gene, and this goes across a hundred species, even fruit flies, and in evolutionary terms there's, you know, there's pros and cons to both.
8:24
Chloe: One is not more superior than the other, but if you are a highly sensitive person, you process things deeply and you're more susceptible to these limiting beliefs, these trauma imprints.
8:37
Chloe: And actually just learning about the highly sensitive person is really validating.
8:41
Chloe: I ask my patients, my clients, to read about that, because it's very validating.
8:48
Chloe: You can understand yourself deeply.
8:52
Cassandra: So do you think you know, and I'm glad we're talking about this, because depression was always, for many years, taboo and in some instances it still is, and people do not like to talk about it or admit it.
9:06
Cassandra: So what you're saying is because you ruminated a lot on things, because of your sensitivity in regard to your relationship and then your your stinking thinking.
9:17
Cassandra: As a child, you know, for example, my dad wanted me to be a doctor, lawyer, but people told me what I was going to be.
9:46
Cassandra: Yet I never had a.
9:48
Cassandra: I never really thought.
9:51
Cassandra: I thought about what I wanted to be, but I thought I couldn't, because that's not what I was told.
9:55
Cassandra: Do you think it's it's your thinking that causes that depression if you think about it long enough, or is it something chemically in the brain?
10:06
Chloe: so I will talk about depression all day long with you, cassandra, because that's my reality, is depression, and when you've worked with hundreds and hundreds of people for the same thing, you start to see a pattern in the subconscious blueprint.
10:19
Chloe: So I can tell you the typical beliefs under depression for anger, for anxiety.
10:24
Chloe: So with depression, that serotonin model was never proven, it was just a hypothesis that was never proven.
10:32
Chloe: But of course it suits big problem to carry on promoting that.
10:36
Chloe: With depression, it's the ultimate rejection of self and it is a belief you know, like if you grew up with parents not being able to attune to you, not being it.
10:49
Chloe: So my story was my story.
10:50
Chloe: That's personal.
10:51
Chloe: But I formed the belief that I was bad, there was something innately wrong with me.
10:55
Chloe: And this is what happens these people, these children, these young children, because nobody could attune to them when they were in a moment of need, that's you know.
11:06
Chloe: Parents went.
11:07
Chloe: If you don't stop crying, I'm going to give you something to cry about inclusion of the child.
11:13
Chloe: There's something wrong with me.
11:14
Chloe: I'm bad, I'm wrong, I'm innately wrong and so this is.
11:19
Chloe: These are the subconscious beliefs beneath the depression, and depression is a freeze response.
11:26
Chloe: So when we're talking about the nervous system, we have fight or flight.
11:31
Chloe: Let's say that's the light in fight flight.
11:34
Chloe: You will find anxiety, you will find rage, anger, which is really typical in pmdd.
11:40
Chloe: And then, when you reach your threshold of fight or flight, your nervous system comes to protect you further because you can't be in that state for too long and you go into freeze response.
11:51
Chloe: Here you will find the depression, you will find dissociation and it's just your nervous system protecting you and moving you into this new state of survival.
12:04
Chloe: Um, because of your perception, your perception of danger right, and the perception comes from your subconscious blueprint I am perceiving that I may be rejected.
12:17
Chloe: As humans, we have to belong to survive.
12:19
Chloe: That's number one.
12:21
Chloe: We have to belong in order to survive.
12:24
Chloe: A human child cannot survive without the parents, without the caregivers keeping them alive.
12:32
Chloe: So it's our priority to survive.
12:33
Chloe: In order to survive, we need to belong.
12:36
Chloe: We need to be the good girl.
12:37
Chloe: We need to, because that's how we parent conditionally.
12:40
Chloe: Oh, if I'm a good girl, then I feel loved.
12:43
Chloe: If I don't do that, then I feel rejected.
12:46
Chloe: I must never do that again.
12:47
Chloe: We're being programmed all the time.
13:03
Cassandra: OK, so so trauma is just not about assault or trauma is a sounds like.
13:05
Cassandra: It's a lot of things you know when you talk about like what, like, what is your definition of trauma?
13:08
Cassandra: Trauma is something that can happen in your childhood.
13:12
Cassandra: Or explain how you define trauma, because I think people see it differently.
13:18
Cassandra: Some people do.
13:20
Chloe: Yeah, I, yeah.
13:21
Chloe: Well, because the general, the general, the general understanding is those things that we call big T trauma, things that happen to you, that shouldn't have happened to you.
13:33
Chloe: I'm not really comfortable with categorizing trauma as big T and small T.
13:39
Chloe: So trauma in Greek means wound, and the thing is we all have different sensitivities, we have a different capacity from one another to hold certain certain events.
13:55
Chloe: So the trauma is not the event.
13:57
Chloe: Actually that could be that traumatic event.
14:00
Chloe: The trauma is what occurs in the body, it's the, the, the glitch in the nervous system, the glitch in your subconscious blueprint.
14:09
Chloe: So you're being splintered from your wholeness.
14:13
Chloe: You're forming these limiting beliefs, these lies about yourself, like I don't matter, I'm not significant, I must never trust myself again, I'm not safe.
14:25
Chloe: And a child, because a child is.
14:28
Chloe: So in the present moment, they tag every belief with and it will always be this way.
14:34
Chloe: And so we go through life until we do this work and we absolutely rectify the blueprint to the truth and that's changing.
14:45
Chloe: We're actually just kind of free-falling through life, not understanding why things are not happening for us, getting in our own way, because we're functioning on software that you created in your formative years with with your child's mind, um, and you know when, I do think that it mostly comes from childhood.
15:08
Chloe: Of course we can have traumatic events in adulthood, but I think that how you react to that depends on your childhood programming.
15:17
Chloe: If you look at soldiers that come back from war, 20% of them come back with PTSD.
15:24
Chloe: Now that makes me think that those 20% perhaps had childhood trauma that exacerbated.
15:30
Chloe: The system is perceiving that.
15:34
Cassandra: Yeah, yeah, so, okay.
15:38
Cassandra: So let's talk about the perimenopause.
15:41
Cassandra: What's the difference?
15:50
Cassandra: Now, as women, many of us know about the menopause.
15:56
Cassandra: If you've not been there, you're going to go, so let's talk about what PMDD.
16:02
Cassandra: I said what it was, but what does that mean?
16:05
Cassandra: Premenstrual dysphoric disorder versus perimenopause?
16:12
Chloe: So premenstrual dysphoric disorder is like PMS on steroids, so I mean it's experienced differently by each woman, actually, and you don't have to have a diagnosis to do this work.
16:28
Chloe: You know, I didn't even know I had it and most people don't, and some.
16:32
Chloe: I realized that a lot of my clients were coming to me and saying I don't know if this is PMDD or it's the perimenopause.
16:40
Chloe: My answer to that is it just doesn't matter.
16:43
Chloe: You've got symptoms that you want to be free of.
16:46
Chloe: If you go to the subconscious root, of it and then they were saying, when they were coming out of my signature program, why don't you do a program for perimenopause?
16:55
Chloe: And I'm like, well it's, it doesn't matter, it's the same work.
17:00
Chloe: So my program wounds into wings is for depression, perimenopause and pmdd.
17:06
Chloe: So with pmdd for me, for instance, now I know what it is.
17:10
Chloe: I learned about it in my training because there was a master class on it from another graduate who had discovered that she healed herself in her training by having sessions on herself.
17:22
Chloe: And I watched this master class and I was like, oh, oh, my God, that's what I had from being 14 years old, from the onset of menstruation, I had it.
17:32
Chloe: Now it's not the same for everybody.
17:34
Chloe: Some women have it just come to them when they're, you know, after childbirth, they start experiencing it, or they experience it later in life.
17:42
Chloe: Now I just see it as a calling to expand your potential right.
17:48
Chloe: It's a calling to heal the past that is keeping you stuck.
17:53
Chloe: The PMDD is the calling you're saying I mean any of these diseases, these disorders that we can improve.
18:02
Chloe: Uh-huh, uh-huh disease, right, okay, yeah, disease in your body.
18:06
Chloe: It's like huh, you know your body is saying no, your body is trying to get your attention if it's trying to get you to look at it, and so that's how I see it.
18:17
Chloe: Now, with pmdd, it's horrendous, you know we have the symptoms are um suicide ideation, um, complete, um shutdown.
18:28
Chloe: Women can't hold down a job because of this.
18:31
Chloe: They can't keep relationships, marriages end because of it.
18:35
Chloe: Because it's like jacqueline, it's like they've been possessed, and it's horrendous because for half a month they're not them.
18:43
Chloe: And these women tend to be the most empathetic, the most creative, caring women and they're experiencing this and and it's.
18:54
Chloe: And when they do this work and they let go of those symptoms and they replace those glitches in their subconscious with the truth about them, the new, empowering opposites, the whole life starts to change you know this is what you know.
19:10
Chloe: This is why I call it wounds into wings now, because it wasn't always that, because it wasn't just feeling their wings, they were transforming their relationships, they were getting pain rises, they were creating magic with their lives, um up with with ideas.
19:26
Chloe: But you know one lady I just finished working with.
19:28
Chloe: She was working in a bar when I started working with her at the beginning of my eight-week program.
19:33
Chloe: When she came out, she already had a business idea to be, um, you know, to do landscaping and garden architecture, and it was like that's what, that's what made her, that's what lit her up.
19:45
Chloe: But she'd never given herself permission to have what she desired, because it wasn't.
19:51
Chloe: The beliefs were what I want doesn't matter, it's not important, and these are childhood beliefs that are keeping us stuck and your subconscious mind will show you whatever we go to.
20:01
Chloe: The symptom of your subconscious mind absolutely has the answer and the problem is your subconscious mind is running the show.
20:04
Chloe: It's running all the processes of your subconscious mind.
20:06
Chloe: Absolutely has the answer and the problem is your subconscious mind is running the show, it's running all the processes in your body and you're running from your subconscious mind.
20:14
Chloe: 95, it's your autopilot, so you can consciously desire something, but if your subconscious programming says something else, the mind can't hold conflicting beliefs.
20:25
Chloe: It's not going to happen.
20:33
Cassandra: So the subconscious could say I'm not good enough, right, because of what somebody said to me back in my childhood.
20:38
Cassandra: Or the subconscious mind can say you know I'll never be this, because my mom says you'll never be nothing.
20:45
Cassandra: You know, I hear I've actually heard individuals arguing with their children and say you, stupid somebody.
20:51
Cassandra: I mean just crazy stuff that they'll say and I'm not quite sure if they understand the impact that they will have as they get older.
20:59
Cassandra: And because we're just talking, I know what hormones.
21:04
Cassandra: Hormones are powerful.
21:06
Cassandra: Let's talk about hormones and we all have the men have them too, but ours, what is that?
21:15
Cassandra: The estrogen, the progesterone, the testosterone, why are they so powerful?
21:23
Chloe: Well, you know, we women are cyclical beings but we live in a man's world and we are expected to be, you know, doing, do it.
21:32
Chloe: And also when we become mothers as well, because mothering is a masculine energy Right.
21:37
Chloe: We're women and we've kind of abandoned the very fact that we have cyclical needs and through the month we need to be honoring those needs.
21:48
Chloe: They're seasons of a month and we have to really honor that and understand that when that luteal phase comes, that shift in hormones is causing us to look inward to do some inspection.
22:04
Chloe: It's like the assessment mode and when you have these glitches in your subconscious mind, you're faced to look, you're faced to feel, because your subconscious mind is the feeling mind.
22:17
Chloe: All of your emotions and your feelings come from the subconscious mind.
22:21
Chloe: Emotion overrides logic every time.
22:25
Chloe: And so when you're in your luteal phase and you're going inward because this is the time where you're supposed to reassess and grow and look where we need to make changes in our lives, but society doesn't, it's not conducive to that I think we're changing this now.
22:45
Chloe: I think we're waking up to the fact that we have to honour our cyclical ways and look after ourselves.
22:52
Chloe: But this time of introspection and this time of going inwards into assessment mode, when you're faced with it's like a truth serum this hormone shift.
23:05
Chloe: It's like lifting the veil on your past pain, on your past trauma that needs to be optimized, it needs to be transformed and it's showing you, showing you that we're like hating on our hormones because we've been programmed to hate on our hormones and programmed, you know, need to keep going, need to keep doing, um, in a very masculine way.
23:29
Chloe: So actually we are very magical beings.
23:34
Chloe: I believe we have immense power and we are we've kind of had that taken away from us um, that that little secret, that actually you know the pain that comes, the feelings that come up in those days.
23:51
Chloe: You need to look at those.
23:52
Chloe: What's that about?
23:53
Chloe: Because that you need to transform that.
23:55
Chloe: You need to look at the root of that and then turn it on its head because it's not true and you can change.
24:02
Chloe: You can absolutely swap that, reframe that limiting belief, but it's showing you.
24:09
Cassandra: Okay, okay.
24:11
Cassandra: Are there quizzes or tests to show whether you have PMDD?
24:20
Cassandra: How does the individual know they have PMDD or, like you said, perimenopause, even though you said they're kind of the same thing?
24:35
Chloe: Well, I mean, yeah, with the perimenopause, I guess you would.
24:39
Chloe: I mean it really, for me, for the work that I do, it really doesn't matter, but you can get hormone.
24:46
Chloe: You can get your hormones checked.
24:47
Chloe: I'm hearing, though, that it's really challenging to get a test for your hormones, and actually, as far as I'm concerned, it really doesn't matter.
24:55
Chloe: We just need to get to the root of this stuff that's coming up for you.
25:00
Chloe: So, with the PMDD, a bit like any other issue, there's a list of symptoms, and you would tick off yeah, I'm suffering with that.
25:08
Chloe: Yeah, I'm suffering with rain, I'm suffering.
25:11
Chloe: You know, people in in in your relationships in those days, people tend to get feel kind of confused about their feelings towards their partner.
25:22
Chloe: They don't want to be touched, they want to isolate.
25:25
Chloe: Um, they, it's like a war against yourself.
25:30
Chloe: Well, it actually is.
25:31
Chloe: You're going inwards and you're seeing all these horrible or experiencing these horrendous beliefs about yourself, that you're wrong, you're bad, that you're not safe, and the relationship issue I mean that's that goes back, goes back to you know, how you felt, how safe you felt around your caregivers, right, and when you're in your most sensitive days and all this stuff is coming to the surface.
26:00
Chloe: The safest thing for you to do, naturally, is isolate, so there's nothing wrong with you.
26:04
Chloe: It's just a healthy response to what you're experiencing.
26:08
Chloe: But it's still alive in your body and it doesn't have to be.
26:12
Chloe: We can get to the root of it, we can transform it and you set yourself free and you understand, because I don't only do the transformational hypnotherapy, we also do polyvagal work to reshape your nervous system.
26:24
Chloe: We learn cognitive psychology to get in control of your thoughts, and positive psychology.
26:32
Chloe: So we're doing the conscious work and the subconscious work.
26:36
Chloe: Really, you know, understand how your brilliant organism is working for you and to continue using these tools as a way of being in your life.
26:47
Cassandra: Yeah, and I like when you said there's nothing wrong with you, you know how, you know.
26:53
Cassandra: I remember, you know, and I, as I mentioned before we started how I went through menopause in my late thirties and I was devastated Like what in the why, why, why, why, why am I so young?
27:07
Cassandra: And because I always hear about it when people are, I don't know 40, 50, 60s and I'm like, wow, what, what is going on with that?
27:18
Cassandra: And so it's kind of like, it's like I did think something was wrong, you know, and for them to say it, I'm like, oh my gosh, what happened to me?
27:30
Cassandra: Why am I like that?
27:32
Cassandra: And then I go introspectively like, maybe because I did this, or maybe because I worried a lot and my hormones trickle, or just something it always has to be.
27:43
Cassandra: If it's not going the way we want it, or or whether we can't control it, we think something's wrong that's it.
27:50
Chloe: Yeah, right, and this is why understanding how your organism works is so important.
27:55
Chloe: The nervous system work, the polyvagal work, because what we do is because of this frontal cortex, the neocortex.
28:02
Chloe: When we experience a stress response like fight or flight, we start to judge it.
28:07
Chloe: We start to judge it, we fear it, which then it increment, it makes it worse the anxiety.
28:13
Chloe: We drive ourselves into a panic attack because we're not understanding.
28:17
Chloe: Oh, this is my nervous system perceiving there's danger.
28:21
Chloe: Now, what am I perceiving?
28:22
Chloe: Fear of judgment.
28:23
Chloe: Well, I validate me.
28:25
Chloe: I'm not a dependent child anymore, right?
28:27
Chloe: So when we can understand the subconscious programming because we've made it conscious and we could we have the tools to bring our nervous system back to homeostasis and understand.
28:38
Chloe: Actually, our nervous system is always working for us, not against us, and we have, you know, our emotions, our behaviors, what we're experiencing.
28:49
Chloe: This is changing your physiology every moment in the day.
28:55
Chloe: You know your genes are switching on and off according to what you need, every moment in the day, according.
29:01
Chloe: This is epigenetics, and so your reactions to things are going to change your hormone, your hormonal levels in your body.
29:11
Chloe: That's just how it is, because your body's incredibly intelligent.
29:15
Chloe: Ah, I need to adapt to this situation.
29:17
Chloe: I mean, that's what these trauma imprints are.
29:20
Chloe: Right, they're adaptations to the environment, just like when a plant is short of, let's say's say, copper, its leaves will go yellow in order to survive.
29:31
Chloe: It's adapting to its environment, just as we have to do, and our nervous system and our and our cells are incredibly intelligent and the subconscious mind is running the show, so it's understanding.
29:44
Chloe: Understanding is power and understanding what you can do, what tools you can pull from, and really, just looking like anytime, I have something I'm like.
29:54
Chloe: This feeling's been here for a few days now and I don't know what this is.
29:58
Chloe: I'm gonna have a session, I'm gonna get to the subconscious root of it and I'm gonna alchemize it because I know it's the next level of growth, it's my next level of expansion and this is what we're here for.
30:09
Chloe: We're here to evolve.
30:10
Chloe: Sadly, the human species is de-evolving, but we, we've got to do the work.
30:16
Chloe: We've got to do the work for us and you know, we've only got one.
30:20
Chloe: We've only got one life in this, in this body, and so we've got to make the most of it and and that was my thing in that moment on the green sofa I've got to become the best version of me.
30:33
Chloe: I've got to find my purpose.
30:34
Chloe: Um, if not, if not for me, for them, because they depend on me, right?
30:40
Cassandra: right.
30:40
Cassandra: So it sounds like you got to a point where enough is enough.
30:46
Cassandra: You know, it's like I'm sick of this and sometimes I believe that's what it takes.
30:52
Cassandra: And even when I think about what I've gone through and thinking about my book and you know my emotions and why it took me so long to write the book I'm like, okay, I'm sick and tired of feeling like I'm feeling, so it's time for me to get help.
31:09
Cassandra: And when I say help, what I did was went on a self-discovery journey.
31:13
Cassandra: Okay, because I'm not sure what it is that I need, you know.
31:19
Cassandra: But it's just like this particular podcast, my listeners there's some listeners out there struggling or either have some friends that are struggling like you know what?
31:28
Cassandra: Maybe I do have PMDD, you know.
31:31
Cassandra: Oh, yeah, I am depressed, or yeah, I'm going to go to the doctor and get some antidepressants, you know.
31:39
Cassandra: And so the work that you do does it mitigate having antidepressants or not?
31:49
Cassandra: Or you think, because I want to hear the tools you use to help people get out of their self or get out of their way, to start living their full potential.
31:59
Cassandra: So what are your tools?
32:01
Cassandra: And do you believe in antidepressants or is it both?
32:10
Chloe: well, you know I have my.
32:13
Chloe: I was put on antidepressants at 17 and you know I'm not against them in that they can be life-saving when you're really rock bottom.
32:21
Chloe: But that for me is like putting earplugs in right where it's like earplugs in and not actually extracting the wisdom from what you're being shown.
32:31
Chloe: Um, many women I work with say I, I just can't be on these antidepressants anymore.
32:37
Chloe: I, I feel numb, um, I have no sex drive.
32:41
Chloe: Um, I just I have to do something.
32:44
Chloe: I can't be on them anymore.
32:45
Chloe: And my point is, with the work that we do, this work makes them futile.
32:53
Chloe: I mean, the point is to do this work and it's rapid and it is super effective, and this is like turning your wounds into wings and so it's to make them unnecessary.
33:05
Chloe: I mean my, my mum, for instance, she was on antidepressants.
33:09
Chloe: She had an RTT session with me.
33:12
Chloe: Never again she's, she's.
33:14
Chloe: You know, and this is this is my own mom and I'm working with hundreds of women.
33:19
Chloe: My mom, bless her, she was on antidepressants for most of her life and struggling.
33:25
Chloe: So I'm not here to say to anybody right now now we've done the session, you can come off the antidepressants right, something you work with with your doctor to wean yourself off them if that's what you want to do.
33:38
Chloe: But my, my, my point is that the work that we do makes just makes them unnecessary.
33:45
Chloe: Actually, because we've gone to the subconscious route and in one session you can be free from depression.
33:51
Chloe: It's, it's, you get to go in there, in, like this hip, the hypnotic brain states that, by the way, are a completely natural brain state that you are in and out of every day.
34:02
Chloe: Because a lot of people worry about the hypnosis thing, because, well, we've grown up watching stage hypnotists making you cluck like a chicken and bark like a dog and do things that you wouldn't normally do.
34:13
Chloe: So people think I'm going to be out of control.
34:14
Chloe: It's just like a meditation.
34:17
Chloe: You're just more in control, you're more aware, you can access.
34:22
Chloe: You can access memories that maybe you couldn't access with your, with your conscious mind.
34:27
Chloe: Some people go to the womb, some people go to being born, some people access memories that they'd completely forgotten.
34:35
Chloe: And whatever your subconscious mind shows you, that's absolutely what you need to look at and we will.
34:43
Chloe: You go back.
34:43
Chloe: So the first thing we do in this two-hour session is regression.
34:47
Chloe: So you'll go back.
34:48
Chloe: Your subconscious mind will show you three or four scenes from your childhood that that they're absolutely to do with, with the root cause, and you will, and through that regression I extract the beliefs.
35:01
Chloe: What's the feeling?
35:02
Chloe: You know, I'm seven years old, I'm sitting on the porch and I'm feeling shame, I'm feeling bad, I'm believing that nobody loves me.
35:12
Chloe: That must mean that I'm unlovable, I'm unlikable.
35:16
Chloe: These beliefs, and so, and across those three, four scenes that you could, that your subconscious mind shows us, you get to see the collection, the paradigm, the, the set of beliefs that have been running the show.
35:30
Chloe: And so, for the rest of those two hours, we do all the reframing, we do the inner child work.
35:34
Chloe: And doing this work in hypnotic brain states is so powerful because it's like going into this portal of infinite resources portal of infinite resources and it's really quite spiritual as well and just reconnecting with yourself and accepting yourself as lovable, as likable, as more than enough, and realize that was always the truth.
36:02
Cassandra: So this approach to hypnotherapy is the approach that enables your patients to break free Absolutely.
36:11
Cassandra: Yeah, okay, all right, have you ever gone through?
36:15
Cassandra: And you say your sessions are about two hours?
36:17
Cassandra: Right, and and what you said about your mom or another patient?
36:24
Cassandra: Like, you can go through a session and you'll be done, right, but then some people may take longer, is that correct?
36:32
Cassandra: More than two hours, and they have to come back another day and redo this again.
36:39
Chloe: So my sessions are two hours long, but after that session you will go away with a 15 minute recording with all the new empowering beliefs pertinent to that session and you must listen to that for 21 to 30 days.
36:55
Chloe: Every day when you go to bed you'll do the self-hypnosis to rewire the subconscious mind.
37:01
Chloe: Because the mind learns in two ways in hypnotic brain states and by repetition.
37:07
Chloe: Children are in brain states until.
37:08
Chloe: By repetition, children are in hypnotic brain states until they're seven years old they are in hypnotic brain states.
37:13
Chloe: That's why they absorb things like sponges, and so that's how the mind learns.
37:18
Chloe: So I go.
37:20
Chloe: I use one session per symptom.
37:23
Chloe: So normally if somebody comes to me with depression and anxiety, I go right, we're going to go to the root cause of the depression.
37:30
Chloe: I want to get you out of freeze response first.
37:32
Chloe: So we go to the root cause of the depression and after, after that session, it's just so different for them and I would say after a day or two they already feel free.
37:46
Chloe: The depression has gone, but they're still listening to the recording and they're still listening to the recording and they're still you working through the conscious lessons that I provide them in my program.
37:54
Chloe: And then, at the end of those three or four weeks we move on to the second session.
37:59
Chloe: So they have all of those days consolidate the new learnings and consolidate and then, we have to move into whatever's left.
38:11
Chloe: So I don't often say, well, well, for the second session we'll do anxiety, because we don't know, the anxiety might also be gone with that first session.
38:20
Chloe: So we just see what's left.
38:21
Chloe: Sometimes people say, do you know what?
38:24
Chloe: I don't know what to work on.
38:25
Chloe: I mean, that's 5% of people I don't know what to work on.
38:33
Chloe: I go's five percent of people I don't know what to work on.
38:34
Chloe: Okay, well, let's work on abundance blocks, let's work on life purpose, you know.
38:36
Chloe: But normally what we do is we go to a fight or flight symptom, like rage like anxiety and then we can get you out of the fight or flight.
38:42
Chloe: And then again they get a new recording with the beliefs pertinent to that session that need to replace the old ones that we pulled out with the reframing and the inner child work.
38:51
Chloe: So then they listen to that new recording for another three to four weeks and by the end of the program they say I'm worried that this isn't going to last.
39:02
Chloe: Oh yeah, I was going to ask that they go.
39:07
Chloe: I'm worried if this feels too good to be true, I'm worried it's not going to last.
39:12
Chloe: And I say this is just the beginning of a whole new way of being, because now we're going to build and build and build.
39:19
Chloe: With the tools that you have Just keep expanding exponentially.
39:24
Chloe: I mean it's mad, being on this journey, how quickly we're growing exponentially.
39:29
Cassandra: I mean it's mad, being on this journey, how quickly we're growing.
39:32
Cassandra: Wow, this is like it's like it could be a miracle.
39:35
Cassandra: I mean, if you think about there's.
39:44
Cassandra: So what did they say?
39:45
Cassandra: Is it one in 10 individuals that are on antidepressants?
39:47
Cassandra: I mean it's huge of individuals that are on that.
39:49
Cassandra: So if they knew about Chloe and the work that you do, it's like well, why don't more people know about you?
39:56
Cassandra: Or either you're going to say, well, that's why I'm doing all these podcasts, and then I read some information.
40:02
Cassandra: You have a lot of testimonials of individuals that have worked with you that talk about how much better their life is, that they are actually reaching what they believe their full potential.
40:14
Cassandra: You've even said that they can become a magnet for happy and good relationships, and even if they're suffering from hormones.
40:25
Cassandra: So this approach you have.
40:27
Cassandra: You know how individuals will see somebody and say something about you.
40:32
Cassandra: You know it's like I don't know what it is, but I feel like I'm drawn to you.
40:38
Cassandra: I've had people say that it's just something, and then, you know, I've even heard doctors say, when your estrogen levels are up, you more.
40:47
Cassandra: You know, I've heard that before like really, you know, um, but what you say, is they become a magnet um loving relationships, harmonious loving relationships.
40:58
Cassandra: So this approach also.
41:00
Cassandra: Once they're somewhat cleared from this, they attract who they are.
41:09
Chloe: Tell us about that.
41:11
Chloe: Yes, Cassandra, I actually ended up becoming a narcissistic abuse specialist because I was seeing the pattern, these beautiful souls that were coming to me with all these horrible limiting beliefs and trauma imprints.
41:26
Chloe: They also had been attracting toxic relationships.
41:30
Chloe: And of course, why do we attract these toxic partners?
41:34
Chloe: Because of the childhood beliefs we have about ourselves.
41:38
Chloe: So it's no coincidence, it's we are.
41:42
Chloe: You know, what we believe tends to be realized, and so we do become a magnet for people that you know benefit from our limiting beliefs.
41:56
Chloe: So when you transform I mean imagine if you've got beliefs like I don't matter, what I want doesn't matter, I'm unlovable what kind of relationship are you going to tolerate?
42:12
Chloe: And so when you turn those beliefs on their head and you're showing up like my God, there's nothing I have to do to be lovable.
42:21
Chloe: Actually, I was born lovable.
42:23
Chloe: I'm enough, I'm enough.
42:26
Chloe: I'm not going to tolerate or even be interested or look at anybody who thinks less of you than you do.
42:33
Chloe: And so it's only natural that you start manifesting all of these amazing things in your life that you hadn't even dreamt were possible.
42:45
Chloe: It goes down to the blueprint, the subconscious blueprint.
42:51
Cassandra: Right, and I hear a lot about generational curses.
42:54
Cassandra: You know I've talked to people to say, well, my mom, always my mom, had had had a child when she was 17, and so did her mom and then so did her mom.
43:03
Cassandra: You know, it's like so we're just cursing, it's like like it's it's okay because that's how my family is.
43:08
Cassandra: But if it, like you're saying, if this is what you believe, I think I saw something you said if you your, your, your, what did you say?
43:15
Cassandra: Your thoughts you had a saying was reading.
43:22
Cassandra: What was that saying about how you feel?
43:24
Chloe: if you do this, say that say that your beliefs create your thoughts.
43:26
Chloe: Your thoughts create your feelings, and your feelings dictate the behavior, they dictate the action you take, and that creates your personal reality.
43:37
Chloe: You've got to go to the root.
43:38
Chloe: It's the beginning.
43:43
Cassandra: It's not the beliefs.
43:44
Cassandra: That's so good.
43:45
Cassandra: Everyone.
43:45
Cassandra: That's Max.
43:46
Cassandra: A lot of my listeners know about Max, my little puppy Max.
43:52
Cassandra: You're going to get my puppy girl.
43:53
Cassandra: Oh my gosh, he was so good and he's not even in the room.
43:58
Cassandra: He just wants you to know he's here.
44:09
Cassandra: Yeah, yeah, gosh he was so good and he's not even in the room.
44:11
Cassandra: He's just want you to know he's here, yeah, yeah, and talking about you know, like my mom, for instance, I noticed my mom, she has a belief that life is hard.
44:20
Cassandra: Right, I'm sorry?
44:21
Cassandra: Oh my gosh, okay, and that's your mom.
44:24
Chloe: And I get really frustrated with that because I'm like you know that's a belief and beliefs are yours to change.
44:30
Chloe: You can carry on believing that it has that life is hard, but I'm not taking that on, I'm letting that go.
44:36
Chloe: I'm choosing that everything is doable, that everything comes to serve me and that you know there's growth from everything.
44:42
Chloe: You know life's, the nature of life, is to challenge us.
44:46
Chloe: Our job is to grow from it.
44:49
Chloe: Yeah, life, its nature is to is to challenge.
44:53
Chloe: That's it, and our job is to just grow from it.
44:56
Chloe: So, yeah, to hold more and actually do the nervous system work, so that our nervous system is not going into a physiological state that is going to create illness wow, that's amazing stress state.
45:18
Chloe: I was like, oh my goodness, the pathways that I am activating physiologically are going to create illness like this is how illness is caused.
45:27
Chloe: I have to take control of my actions and my thoughts.
45:31
Chloe: How do I do that?
45:33
Chloe: I've got to change the belief system right, excellent, right, excellent, excellent, wow.
45:40
Cassandra: This conversation was awesome.
45:42
Cassandra: It certainly provides my listeners insights on why they are stuck.
45:49
Cassandra: I mean, it could be different things, however, but just think you know, are they?
45:54
Cassandra: Are they having these symptoms?
45:56
Cassandra: You talked about the depression.
45:58
Cassandra: I'm not good enough all this thought patterns.
46:01
Cassandra: Or are they in the menopausal stage or the pre-menopausal stage?
46:06
Cassandra: And, like we said in the beginning, what you may not have known about, pmdd or perimenopause, as you indicated, it's one and the same.
46:20
Cassandra: I mean, let's just you know, it's kind of like when they talk about dementia and what's it, and the doctor said well, to me it's the same as an umbrella, you know well, you know, trying to figure out do they have dementia?
46:34
Cassandra: And then it's called something else.
46:35
Cassandra: And then they said, well, it's all the same.
46:41
Chloe: Yeah, I mean, I don mean the labels are useful, they can feel validating, but I for me, with the work that I do, doesn't matter.
46:46
Chloe: We're working for the root cause of the symptom and you know, perimenopause is showing you you're, you're being shown, you know those, those months or years running up to the menopause, you're being shown what you need to alchemize, what you need to look at in order to expand and and really you know be who you're meant to be.
47:08
Chloe: It's screaming out.
47:10
Chloe: So pmdd is pms on steroids.
47:13
Chloe: You can have it from your period, perimenopause symptoms that obviously show up in the months running up to the menopause, in the years.
47:21
Chloe: So it really doesn't matter.
47:23
Chloe: You know we, we go to the root cause of I mean, I worked with breast cancer we go to the emotional root cause of whatever you are struggling with and we just transform the subconscious blueprint.
47:37
Chloe: So, yeah, you don't need a, you don't.
47:41
Chloe: You don't need um the label, because your feelings are the most real thing you have.
47:47
Chloe: You're a human, your feelings are real.
47:49
Chloe: You don't need a doctor to say, oh well, you've got this, how's that useful so that they can give you a pill.
47:55
Chloe: But that's benefiting who?
47:58
Cassandra: yes, yeah, right yeah, so we have to be careful what we're thinking right with our past and um our blinders that we have on the things that people told us, those limiting beliefs and all of that.
48:13
Chloe: Wow and we're not even conscious of them.
48:16
Chloe: Actually, that's the thing.
48:17
Chloe: And you actually spoke about rumination.
48:20
Chloe: So, yeah, the rumination tends to take us deeper into the depression, ruminating over things we do that don't we cause shame.
48:29
Chloe: Oh, I shouldn't have said that.
48:30
Chloe: Oh, I shouldn't have done that.
48:32
Chloe: The rumination, and then the anxiety, typically is worrying about what could happen, about the future, but those thoughts come from a subconscious blueprint about your safety in this world.
48:49
Cassandra: That's wonderful, Wonderful Boy.
48:52
Cassandra: How can my listeners get in touch with you?
48:56
Chloe: Well, instagram.
48:58
Chloe: I am on Instagram and if you would like to come and have a chat with me, I offer 15 minute free discovery calls where we can start to map out your healing journey.
49:15
Chloe: So you can book that call via my website into wingscom Um, and you can DM me on Instagram If you're feeling ready to to start this amazing transformational work and become the best you rapidly getting to the root.
49:37
Chloe: Cause me on Instagram and book a call with me.
49:41
Chloe: I'd be delighted.
49:43
Cassandra: Wow, you were great.
49:45
Cassandra: I definitely know what PMDD means and the perimenopause and I'm getting a better understanding in regards to our nervous system and our thinking, and I think many of us already know that our thoughts have so much to do with what's going on in our lives.
50:08
Cassandra: It's just that many of us don't want to do the work, and you didn't get like this yesterday, so don't think you're going to get out of it tomorrow.
50:20
Cassandra: You know, because we're a quick, like a microwave society, we want it right now, but yet one of these things these podcasts have been doing is providing resources and giving individuals insight and another way of thinking about things.
50:34
Cassandra: You know, it opens them up to what's really out here in the world, and it's their decision.
50:39
Cassandra: I think having your choice is a gift to me.
50:41
Cassandra: So it's their decision to whether this is the route they want to go in, because I definitely believe that we're all here for a reason, and it's tough to figure out what the reason is when you're stuck, you know, like I just can't get out of this cycle that I'm in.
50:59
Cassandra: I can't even think straight, I can't even focus and, based on the work that you do, you are definitely a resource.
51:07
Cassandra: I see you as a blessing for those who are open and want to get better.
51:12
Cassandra: I would say so.
51:16
Cassandra: I'd like to thank you, my listeners, I know you've enjoyed this and I ask that if you have friends, family, acquaintances that you know, this would resonate with them and it could be a blessing to them.
51:29
Cassandra: Please share it, please share this podcast with them.
51:33
Cassandra: It's also going to be on every podcast platform and I just want to thank Chloe for being on my podcast.
51:42
Cassandra: It's just great.
51:43
Cassandra: And for my listeners, I always say bye for now.
51:47
Cassandra: God bless you, and also listen to this podcast more than once.
51:53
Cassandra: It's okay to get it in your psyche and hear it over and over, again, again, because I'm certain it'll be a blessing.
51:59
Cassandra: And, chloe, I have to say bye for now.
52:03
Cassandra: And again, thank you so much for being a guest on my podcast.
52:08
Cassandra: Is your way, in your way.
52:10
Cassandra: Thank you, chloe.
52:12
Chloe: Thank you, Cassandra Bye.