Latest / Hurdle with Emily Abbate / 306. Defining Success: Olympian Rachel Smith On Using Running To Cope & A Comeback Years In the Making

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306. Defining Success: Olympian Rachel Smith On Using Running To Cope & A Comeback Years In the Making · Hurdle with Emily Abbate

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: At the end of the day when I'm like, all right,
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: if I really stay true to my definition of success,
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: it's so separate from some outcome or some destination, and
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: that makes me feel, I don't know, way more excited
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: to just like do what I can and let go
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: of the rest.
• 0:31
  Speaker 2: Hey hurdlers, Emily Abadi Here you are listening to episode
• 0:35
  Speaker 2: three hundred and six of Hurdle, a wellness focused podcast
• 0:39
  Speaker 2: where I talk to inspirational people about everything from their
• 0:42
  Speaker 2: highest ties and toughest moments to essential tips on how
• 0:45
  Speaker 2: to live a healthier, happier, more motivated life. We all
• 0:50
  Speaker 2: go through our fair share of hurdles. My goal through
• 0:53
  Speaker 2: these discussions is to empower you to better navigate yours
• 0:56
  Speaker 2: and move with intention so that you can stride towards
• 0:59
  Speaker 2: your own big potential and of course have some fun
• 1:03
  Speaker 2: along the way. For today's episode, I am chatting with
• 1:08
  Speaker 2: Rachel Smith, and Olympian and HOKA sponsored professional runner who
• 1:12
  Speaker 2: will be if you're listening to this in real time
• 1:15
  Speaker 2: towing the starting line tonight at the US Olympic Track
• 1:18
  Speaker 2: and Field Trials in the five.
• 1:20
  Speaker 3: K for the woman's final.
• 1:22
  Speaker 2: So all the good vibes out there Rachel, we are
• 1:25
  Speaker 2: rooting for you. In today's episode, we talk about so
• 1:28
  Speaker 2: much more than her evolution with running in sport. The
• 1:31
  Speaker 2: mom of one year old Nova opens up about pregnancy
• 1:34
  Speaker 2: after loss and how she used running to grieve after miscarriage.
• 1:39
  Speaker 2: We also talk about what it's been like for her
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: to make a comeback in sport, recently winning the USATF
• 1:45
  Speaker 2: fifteen k Championship and placing second in the USATF ten
• 1:50
  Speaker 2: mile Championship. I love her sentiments on a non linear career,
• 1:55
  Speaker 2: coming back to sport after having her baby, and how
• 1:59
  Speaker 2: she truly to find success regardless of whether or not
• 2:02
  Speaker 2: she walks away from a race in a top spot.
• 2:05
  Speaker 2: I'm rooting for Rachel. I'm so stoked for her. What
• 2:09
  Speaker 2: a true inspiring journey that she's on and regardless of
• 2:14
  Speaker 2: what happens at this final tonight, this woman is such.
• 2:18
  Speaker 3: A rock star.
• 2:19
  Speaker 2: Make sure you're following along with Hurdle over on social
• 2:22
  Speaker 2: It's at Hurdle Podcast. I am over at Emily a Body,
• 2:26
  Speaker 2: And if you're not yet subscribed to the weekly newsletter,
• 2:29
  Speaker 2: I would love it for you to do so.
• 2:31
  Speaker 3: The link to do that is in the show notes.
• 2:33
  Speaker 2: In there, you'll get so much of the same stuff
• 2:35
  Speaker 2: you love about the show directly in your inbox, inspiration, motivation,
• 2:40
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• 2:44
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• 2:48
  Speaker 2: The link to subscribe is in the show notes. With that,
• 2:52
  Speaker 2: let's get to it. Let's get to hurdling.
• 3:00
  Speaker 3: Today.
• 3:00
  Speaker 2: I am sitting down with Rachel Smith. She's a professional
• 3:04
  Speaker 2: runner for HOKA. How are we doing today?
• 3:06
  Speaker 3: You being really well?
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: Thanks? Thanks for having me on.
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: Oh my god, so happy to have you on. I
• 3:11
  Speaker 2: need to give context about what's going on here. Rachel
• 3:13
  Speaker 2: is in her closet.
• 3:18
  Speaker 3: People need to know.
• 3:19
  Speaker 2: Rachel is in her closet. It is the best place
• 3:21
  Speaker 2: for recording in her home. And all I will say
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: is that I appreciate the commitment to podcasting.
• 3:29
  Speaker 3: You know.
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: I was just all about the best sound quality we
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: could get. My babies napping upstairs and the dogs are
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: running throughout the house, so it's like, where is the
• 3:37
  Speaker 1: most secluded quiet spot, And I ended up in the closet.
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: I'm so grateful. This is Jess Audio.
• 3:47
  Speaker 2: We love that well, Rachel, I'm so happy to find
• 3:49
  Speaker 2: the time to sit down with you because you have
• 3:52
  Speaker 2: absolutely nothing going on right now gearing up at the
• 3:55
  Speaker 2: time of this recording for the US Olympic Trials.
• 3:59
  Speaker 3: Give me a gut check. How are you feeling in
• 4:01
  Speaker 3: this moment.
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: That's a complicated question. I am feeling so many different
• 4:06
  Speaker 1: things heading into the Olympic Trials next week. It was
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: actually I was just reflecting on this because things have
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: been pretty hard these last two months. I got this
• 4:17
  Speaker 1: right right when I was like really starting to feel
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: peak fitness again and feeling like I was an Olympic
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: standard shape and had all these big races in the
• 4:26
  Speaker 1: month of May on the schedule. I tweaked my hamstring
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: and it took a little bit longer to fully figure
• 4:34
  Speaker 1: out how to make that go away. So I had
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: to take off my entire May from racing, which which
• 4:42
  Speaker 1: is a really big deal for me because I don't
• 4:44
  Speaker 1: have the Olympic standards now going into the trials, which
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: is a huge bummer and kind of makes my path
• 4:50
  Speaker 1: to Paris way more challenging because it leaves it all
• 4:54
  Speaker 1: down to the trials. So I've just been reflecting on
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: kind of my mindset around that. Then these last two months,
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: along with the hamstring strain included some other like life
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: challenges such as leaning my one year old, which was
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: pretty like hormonal emotional process for me. And she also
• 5:14
  Speaker 1: started teething and that was a lot of like disrupted sleep.
• 5:17
  Speaker 1: And then my husband is an NCAA track coach and
• 5:21
  Speaker 1: he has to travel a lot these last two months
• 5:23
  Speaker 1: for third championship season, so just a lot of solo parenting.
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: And yeah, it's been it's been a like very kind
• 5:31
  Speaker 1: of tumultuous last two months leading into the trials. But
• 5:34
  Speaker 1: at the same time, I'm I'm fit and I'm healthy.
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: And one year ago, I you know, I wasn't even
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: running postpartum yet I had a one month old, and
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: I would be so so excited to know that I'd
• 5:48
  Speaker 1: be heading to the Olympic Trials feeling fit and my
• 5:51
  Speaker 1: whole family's coming, and you know, there is there's a
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: shot at Paris, which ultimately is just it's an amazing
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: place to be. So also feeling a lot of gratituy
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: and so many things in my life feel so so
• 6:03
  Speaker 1: rich in the right way. So a lot of feelings,
• 6:07
  Speaker 1: a lot of feelings.
• 6:08
  Speaker 2: Talk about the power of perspective, what a beautiful way
• 6:11
  Speaker 2: to look at where you are right now to say that, yes,
• 6:14
  Speaker 2: there have been a lot of challenges and there are
• 6:16
  Speaker 2: a lot of things that I wasn't able to prepare
• 6:18
  Speaker 2: for or didn't plan for. And how amazing is it
• 6:22
  Speaker 2: that I am in this place as I am, even
• 6:26
  Speaker 2: if it doesn't go farther from here. So really beautiful
• 6:30
  Speaker 2: reflection for those that might not be in the loop.
• 6:34
  Speaker 2: A few things I want to double click on. The
• 6:35
  Speaker 2: first thing is for the Olympic standard. So right now
• 6:38
  Speaker 2: you have the Olympic Trial standard, which means that you're
• 6:41
  Speaker 2: able to run at the Olympic Trials, and then what
• 6:45
  Speaker 2: happens then if you come in top three but don't
• 6:49
  Speaker 2: have the Olympic standard.
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: That is a great question and a bit confusing for
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: fans and for participants of the sport, because to make
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: it to Paris you need two things. You either need
• 7:01
  Speaker 1: to have hit the Olympic standard, which is very challenging time,
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: or to be in the world ranking quota and to
• 7:11
  Speaker 1: be in the world the top world drinking you need
• 7:13
  Speaker 1: to have run multiple races in the last year year
• 7:15
  Speaker 1: and a half. I was unable to race last year
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: with just having given birth, so I don't have the
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: World drinking points. So I need to have the time
• 7:25
  Speaker 1: standard and be top three at the trials, and you
• 7:29
  Speaker 1: can run that standard at the trials, it's just a
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: little bit more difficult to do so there.
• 7:35
  Speaker 3: So yeah, yeah, the you're like, so here we are.
• 7:41
  Speaker 2: So let it be known, however, that you came in
• 7:45
  Speaker 2: third in the five k at the last Olympic Trials
• 7:48
  Speaker 2: and you went to Tokyo, and that is why you
• 7:52
  Speaker 2: are an Olympian.
• 7:53
  Speaker 3: With that said, you know a thing or two about pressure.
• 7:57
  Speaker 2: So clearly this situation is one of high stakes and
• 8:01
  Speaker 2: a lot of pressure. How have you learned to best
• 8:05
  Speaker 2: navigate pressure for yourself?
• 8:07
  Speaker 1: Thank you for asking that, because it really has been
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: a learning process and I really messed up at the
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: Olympic Trials in twenty sixteen. Twenty fifteen, at the US Championships,
• 8:20
  Speaker 1: I had this amazing race. I missed making the World
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: Championship team by point zero one second. So going into
• 8:27
  Speaker 1: twenty sixteen, I was like, I'm going to make this
• 8:29
  Speaker 1: Olympic team, and I was so focused on the outcome.
• 8:33
  Speaker 3: Like I was.
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: I went into the twenty sixteen Olympic Trials and just
• 8:37
  Speaker 1: put so much pressure on myself and had a terrible
• 8:42
  Speaker 1: showing at the trials. I didn't even make the final
• 8:44
  Speaker 1: in the fifteen hundred and just left feeling really disappointed
• 8:49
  Speaker 1: in myself and the way that I handled my mindset
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: around that trials. And it wasn't the type of athlete
• 8:57
  Speaker 1: or the person I wanted to be. Like, I hear
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: so much about the process and like the reasons, like
• 9:04
  Speaker 1: the why behind I'm doing what I'm doing, and it
• 9:07
  Speaker 1: really has never been about some outcome. So I messed
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: that up in twenty sixteen. I allowed all this pressure
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: that I put on myself to really undermine what I
• 9:17
  Speaker 1: was capable of doing in twenty sixteen. So heading into
• 9:20
  Speaker 1: twenty twenty one, luckily I had learned from twenty sixteen
• 9:24
  Speaker 1: and I really really focused on just the process and
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: focusing on the things I could do within my control.
• 9:32
  Speaker 1: And my coach, who's also my husband, and I just
• 9:35
  Speaker 1: talked a lot about like, Okay, how would we define
• 9:38
  Speaker 1: success at the twenty twenty one Olympic Trials, And you know,
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: while so many people are so fixated on being top three,
• 9:46
  Speaker 1: I was like, you know, I want to be really
• 9:48
  Speaker 1: proud of getting fourth place if I like gave it
• 9:51
  Speaker 1: my all and I got fourth place, I want to
• 9:53
  Speaker 1: walk away feeling proud. So that was it. Like in
• 9:56
  Speaker 1: twenty twenty one, I just I really kind of let
• 9:59
  Speaker 1: go of the outcome and focus on doing the things
• 10:02
  Speaker 1: in my control, competing to the best of my abilities,
• 10:06
  Speaker 1: just focusing on the joy and the gratitude of getting
• 10:09
  Speaker 1: to be out there. And fortunately that landed me in
• 10:12
  Speaker 1: third place, and it was such an honor to represent
• 10:15
  Speaker 1: the US at the Tokyo Olympics.
• 10:17
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 10:17
  Speaker 2: You know, it's so interesting because at first you phrase
• 10:21
  Speaker 2: what happened in twenty sixteen as such a mistake, but
• 10:25
  Speaker 2: what happened in twenty sixteen then enabled you just show
• 10:28
  Speaker 2: up the next time around and learn from that hardship.
• 10:32
  Speaker 2: And that is such a big building block when we
• 10:35
  Speaker 2: talk about navigating life's challenges and hurdles in that these
• 10:40
  Speaker 2: difficult moments. It's hard to see it in the instance
• 10:45
  Speaker 2: in when it's happening, but that difficult moment teaches you
• 10:48
  Speaker 2: something that you then get to choose to do something
• 10:52
  Speaker 2: with as you move forward. And that's exactly again what
• 10:55
  Speaker 2: you did in twenty twenty.
• 10:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly. And when I look back on that kind
• 11:00
  Speaker 1: of grateful for what happened, in twenty sixteen, like I
• 11:02
  Speaker 1: no longer see it as like a failure, Like it
• 11:05
  Speaker 1: was very pivotal in my career in how I frame things,
• 11:09
  Speaker 1: And I think the only failure would have been if
• 11:11
  Speaker 1: I hadn't learned from what happened in twenty sixteen and
• 11:14
  Speaker 1: didn't use it to be better at the next time.
• 11:17
  Speaker 3: One hundred percent.
• 11:18
  Speaker 2: And this also, as you said, a lot's going on
• 11:22
  Speaker 2: in your life right now, and as it has been
• 11:24
  Speaker 2: in seasons past, many difficult things you have overcome there
• 11:28
  Speaker 2: as well. Do you believe that what happened to you
• 11:31
  Speaker 2: in twenty sixteen and navigating that loss, albeit very different,
• 11:36
  Speaker 2: helped you navigate some of the difficult moments that you
• 11:40
  Speaker 2: had in your personal life sharing publicly now you have
• 11:43
  Speaker 2: a beautiful baby girl, but before that, dealing with miscarriage.
• 11:46
  Speaker 2: Do you believe that the other hurdles that you faced
• 11:49
  Speaker 2: in your athletic career have helped you learn how to
• 11:52
  Speaker 2: deal both on and off the track.
• 11:54
  Speaker 3: Absolutely.
• 11:55
  Speaker 1: I think not just running, but sport as a whole
• 11:58
  Speaker 1: is such a platform for life lessons and the way
• 12:02
  Speaker 1: that we conduct ourselves on and off the field or
• 12:04
  Speaker 1: the track. I've kind of always felt that way like
• 12:07
  Speaker 1: you can really learn and grow so much from sport
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: and then use it in really applicable ways in your life.
• 12:15
  Speaker 1: And I have so much, yeah, so much gratitude for
• 12:19
  Speaker 1: the way that running has taught me really important things
• 12:23
  Speaker 1: about myself and ways to navigate hardship and loss and disappointment,
• 12:29
  Speaker 1: and just really needing to be able to grieve those
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: losses and then to like move forward and hopefully to
• 12:37
  Speaker 1: really yeah, blossom in whatever comes next.
• 12:41
  Speaker 2: But yeah, for sure, you said that word grief, and
• 12:46
  Speaker 2: I think that that is obviously such a through line
• 12:49
  Speaker 2: in so many of our lives, although one that we
• 12:52
  Speaker 2: don't really want to focus on or process or deal with.
• 12:56
  Speaker 2: For you, in the instances of grief that you have navigated,
• 13:01
  Speaker 2: how do you find yourself successfully eventually moving through them?
• 13:06
  Speaker 3: How have you learned to process your grief?
• 13:10
  Speaker 1: I think it's so important to allow yourself to feel it.
• 13:13
  Speaker 1: And whether that's grieving something in sport or grieving something
• 13:17
  Speaker 1: in life, I think it's such a connector to humanity.
• 13:21
  Speaker 1: In again, whether it's sport or life, every single person
• 13:24
  Speaker 1: deals with adversity, Everyone deals with loss, everyone deals with setbacks,
• 13:29
  Speaker 1: and the way that you deal with it can be
• 13:33
  Speaker 1: so healthy or unhealthy, and to me, I've really I
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: definitely don't want to be a preacher here because I
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: feel like sometimes I've gotten some things right and looking
• 13:44
  Speaker 1: back and like, oh, I really wish I conducted myself
• 13:46
  Speaker 1: differently in during that timeframe. But for me, both with
• 13:51
  Speaker 1: running and with personal things, I think it is it
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: has been so important in such a teacher to really
• 13:58
  Speaker 1: be present with what you're feeling and to like allow
• 14:01
  Speaker 1: yourself to be still and to like sit in that,
• 14:04
  Speaker 1: and to like lean on people when you need to
• 14:06
  Speaker 1: lean on people, and then to like find ways forward,
• 14:10
  Speaker 1: but also know that it may not be like a
• 14:12
  Speaker 1: linear process. Like at least for me with grieving, I
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: found it was never like okay, like I'm done grieving
• 14:18
  Speaker 1: and now like I've moved forward, Like it was very
• 14:21
  Speaker 1: it would circle back on itself and it would become
• 14:24
  Speaker 1: like a part of me at certain certain stages. And
• 14:26
  Speaker 1: I think it's an opportunity to really allow yourself to
• 14:32
  Speaker 1: listen to your inner voice and to really like be
• 14:35
  Speaker 1: present and to make sure that you're not just trying
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: to like skip over the stepbacks and skip over the
• 14:43
  Speaker 1: hard things, but really to like be in those moments
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: and to allow yourself to feel them before moving completely forward,
• 14:50
  Speaker 1: and hopefully when you do move forward, you're a stronger
• 14:52
  Speaker 1: or just you've grown from it.
• 14:55
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that growth is so important.
• 14:57
  Speaker 2: I love what you said about a allowing.
• 15:00
  Speaker 3: Yourself to lean on other people.
• 15:01
  Speaker 2: For so many myself included, I have this desire to
• 15:07
  Speaker 2: want to do it myself, and I also think that
• 15:12
  Speaker 2: part of that comes from being an entrepreneur, being someone
• 15:17
  Speaker 2: I'm single in my mid thirties, I'm like, I don't
• 15:20
  Speaker 2: need anyone, Like I can do this myself, and it's like, no,
• 15:22
  Speaker 2: it's okay, Like it's okay to ask for help, it's okay.
• 15:26
  Speaker 3: To lean on other people.
• 15:27
  Speaker 2: And if the people that care about you knew that
• 15:30
  Speaker 2: you were really making an effort not to ask them
• 15:34
  Speaker 2: to help you, they would probably look at you and
• 15:36
  Speaker 2: be like, what are you doing?
• 15:38
  Speaker 1: Sometimes I'm not good at like making myself uncomfortable, and
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: I agree, like sometimes I'm just like I can handle
• 15:44
  Speaker 1: this on my own, and like I'll just like hold
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: this in and I'm like okay. Like running is such
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: a practice of being being comfortable with the uncomfortable, and
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: sometimes like leaning on people feels really uncomfortable. But then
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: it's like, Oh, my gosh, Like the strength they just
• 16:01
  Speaker 1: gave me by allowing me to like cry with them
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: or to like allow them to just sit with me
• 16:06
  Speaker 1: in my grief is so powerful and then ultimately makes
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: me want to like be able to pay that forward
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: and to do that for other people. So I think
• 16:17
  Speaker 1: running is again a great analogy of like, it's good
• 16:20
  Speaker 1: to be uncomfortable. It's good to make ourselves uncomfortable and
• 16:22
  Speaker 1: do things that maybe don't come naturally but can really
• 16:25
  Speaker 1: help us.
• 16:27
  Speaker 2: Interesting that concept of don't come naturally. When you think
• 16:30
  Speaker 2: about things that haven't come naturally for you, what comes
• 16:33
  Speaker 2: to mind.
• 16:35
  Speaker 3: Oh, wow, that's a I have to think about that.
• 16:40
  Speaker 2: I will aside from I mean, obviously, in this instance
• 16:43
  Speaker 2: you're talking about the fact that it doesn't come naturally
• 16:45
  Speaker 2: always to lean on other people. But that is something
• 16:47
  Speaker 2: that you've had to learn, a skill that you've had
• 16:50
  Speaker 2: to lean into despite it being uncomfortable. But I am
• 16:53
  Speaker 2: sure that over the last few years, especially when it
• 16:56
  Speaker 2: comes to your journey to motherhood, there were other things
• 16:58
  Speaker 2: that didn't come naturally that you had to both learn
• 17:01
  Speaker 2: to accept and then also embrace.
• 17:04
  Speaker 1: Yes, that's so true. I thinking about it, I'd say
• 17:08
  Speaker 1: one of the things that maybe doesn't come super naturally
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: to me is just being still. I've read Ryan Holliday's
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: book Still Miss is the Key a couple of years ago,
• 17:17
  Speaker 1: and there's so much wisdom in that book about how we,
• 17:21
  Speaker 1: like as a society, have gotten so caught up in
• 17:24
  Speaker 1: just being so NonStop and fast paced and busy is better.
• 17:28
  Speaker 1: And I totally am a like type a want to
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: be very productive all the time person, and it's been
• 17:37
  Speaker 1: so I for like a year and a half, I
• 17:39
  Speaker 1: had a daily meditation practice, and that did not come
• 17:42
  Speaker 1: naturally to me to just like sit in total silence
• 17:46
  Speaker 1: and just focus on my breathing and like quieting the mind.
• 17:49
  Speaker 1: But it was such a powerful practice and eventually became
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: more and more natural to like implement. But it was
• 17:58
  Speaker 1: a very like uncomfortable, unnatural practice at first. And I
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: think there's so much value coming from just sitting in
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: stillness or like being still and like quieting the mind
• 18:12
  Speaker 1: and the body for periods of time.
• 18:15
  Speaker 2: Everyone listening to this wants to know the why and
• 18:18
  Speaker 2: the how why did you side for a year and
• 18:20
  Speaker 2: a half and how did you implement it regularly to.
• 18:23
  Speaker 3: Make it work for you.
• 18:25
  Speaker 1: I downloaded this app called Headspace, which was a really
• 18:28
  Speaker 1: good like accountability app and just super basic but would
• 18:32
  Speaker 1: take me through like a guided I typically did it
• 18:34
  Speaker 1: for ten minutes a day, like nothing super long or yeah,
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: hard to do, but it kept track of like a
• 18:42
  Speaker 1: daily streak and like it was like, okay, that holds
• 18:44
  Speaker 1: me accountable. And I was really flexible with it, like
• 18:48
  Speaker 1: I didn't I wasn't like rigid on the time of
• 18:51
  Speaker 1: day that I had to meditate or place. I just
• 18:54
  Speaker 1: was like ten minutes a day, I will like sit
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: and like close my eyes and just focus on my breathing.
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: And I actually really liked doing it in different places
• 19:03
  Speaker 1: because you know, distractions would come up, like the dogs
• 19:06
  Speaker 1: would like come in and lick my face, and it
• 19:08
  Speaker 1: was like such a good like practice of being like
• 19:10
  Speaker 1: all right, when a distraction comes up, meet it and
• 19:13
  Speaker 1: then like let it go and like come back to
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: the breath. So yeah, that's how I did it. I
• 19:18
  Speaker 1: you know, I've so far from being a meditation expert,
• 19:22
  Speaker 1: so I don't.
• 19:23
  Speaker 2: Know it's fine, but I think that that's super relatable,
• 19:25
  Speaker 2: right because so many people hear someone say and then
• 19:28
  Speaker 2: I did meditation for ten minutes day for a year
• 19:30
  Speaker 2: and a half, and you're like, but how how did
• 19:32
  Speaker 2: it happen?
• 19:33
  Speaker 3: Now you say for a year and a half. So
• 19:35
  Speaker 3: did it end? It? Did it did? Which is such
• 19:37
  Speaker 3: a one did end? Why did it end? Tell us?
• 19:40
  Speaker 3: I did it?
• 19:41
  Speaker 1: And I feel like it might have ended in for
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: twenty twenty two and I don't even know why.
• 19:48
  Speaker 3: There's no reason.
• 19:51
  Speaker 1: What I think ultimately happened was I transitioned from using
• 19:55
  Speaker 1: the app to just like trying to find moments of
• 19:57
  Speaker 1: stillness throughout the day without me it to be tracked
• 20:01
  Speaker 1: or needing to like I think honestly, I probably was
• 20:03
  Speaker 1: starting to get a little dopamine hit every time I
• 20:05
  Speaker 1: saw the number go up, and I'm like, Okay, this
• 20:08
  Speaker 1: is like totally against the point of my meditation practice,
• 20:11
  Speaker 1: Like I'm not trying to do this for like a
• 20:14
  Speaker 1: like a streak number, Like I'm trying to do this
• 20:17
  Speaker 1: to like, you know, mentally like grow here. Yeah, so
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: I lost the practice with headspace, but I even like
• 20:24
  Speaker 1: to this day, will sometimes try to just be like
• 20:27
  Speaker 1: very very like intentionally mindfully present and sometimes just like
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: sit with like no technology and just be with myself.
• 20:35
  Speaker 1: And yeah, so I like to think I still practice
• 20:39
  Speaker 1: even if it's not quite as a like routine or regia.
• 20:44
  Speaker 3: Yeah, not as gamified. That's funny, you know.
• 20:47
  Speaker 2: And I also think that for myself, the gamification of
• 20:51
  Speaker 2: meditation was something that empowered me to stick with it
• 20:56
  Speaker 2: as well. Although, at least at this point, having had multiple,
• 21:00
  Speaker 2: as they like to call them in these apps streaks,
• 21:03
  Speaker 2: I do feel more capable of doing what you're saying
• 21:08
  Speaker 2: works for you at different points, which is the stop
• 21:12
  Speaker 2: breathe for two minutes, even if it's something like a
• 21:14
  Speaker 2: simple box breath. At least I know that I have
• 21:17
  Speaker 2: these tools in my personal toolbox that I have the
• 21:21
  Speaker 2: opportunity to use, breakout, execute at any time.
• 21:26
  Speaker 1: Absolutely, And I hope Headspace or whatever meditation app would
• 21:29
  Speaker 1: be so excited to hear people say that and be
• 21:32
  Speaker 1: like all right, like mission accomplished.
• 21:33
  Speaker 3: We gave people these tools to you.
• 21:35
  Speaker 1: Be more mindful throughout the day and to be able
• 21:38
  Speaker 1: to create some stillness in their lives. So thank you, Headspace.
• 21:42
  Speaker 1: I just really do you think I got some valuable
• 21:45
  Speaker 1: lifelong tools from that year and a half using that app.
• 21:52
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• 23:24
  Speaker 2: You did mention earlier that you had to take some
• 23:28
  Speaker 2: time off because of.
• 23:29
  Speaker 3: A hamstring injury.
• 23:30
  Speaker 2: Talk to me a little bit about how you navigated
• 23:35
  Speaker 2: that time period not being able to move as you'd hoped,
• 23:38
  Speaker 2: because I know that that's not the first time again
• 23:42
  Speaker 2: in the last handful of years, that you've had to
• 23:44
  Speaker 2: execute in that way.
• 23:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah, geez. I mean, every single athlete I think has
• 23:50
  Speaker 1: experience with injuries and setbacks, and especially at unideal times,
• 23:55
  Speaker 1: Like I have a handful of peers who had really
• 24:00
  Speaker 1: really awesome shots at making this pairs team and they're
• 24:02
  Speaker 1: not even going to be able to line up at
• 24:04
  Speaker 1: the Olympic Trials, and my heart has just been aching
• 24:07
  Speaker 1: for them because you know how hard your competitors are
• 24:10
  Speaker 1: working and how much this sport just like means to us.
• 24:14
  Speaker 1: So with my hamstring thing, I was fairly confident it
• 24:17
  Speaker 1: wouldn't take me out for the season, Like I knew
• 24:20
  Speaker 1: I would be able to hopefully line up at the
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: trials and come back from it pretty quick, and even
• 24:26
  Speaker 1: even throughout the month that it took me to like
• 24:28
  Speaker 1: fully get rid of it. I was still able to
• 24:29
  Speaker 1: train quite a bit, but I just couldn't sprint on it.
• 24:33
  Speaker 1: So I had to unfortunately miss a lot of my
• 24:35
  Speaker 1: key racing for the season, which were all my opportunities
• 24:39
  Speaker 1: to kind of go after that the Olympic standards. But yeah, mentally,
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: I tried to stay really dialed in and like believe that, like, Okay,
• 24:47
  Speaker 1: next week, you know you'll be able to like sprint
• 24:49
  Speaker 1: on it again. And it's frustrating though. It's really frustrating
• 24:52
  Speaker 1: when you're on such a time sensitive schedule and like
• 24:57
  Speaker 1: need need things to be firing at a at a
• 24:59
  Speaker 1: certain time for that Olympic dream to stay alive. But
• 25:03
  Speaker 1: I have a great team of physios in this area
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: and they were so in it with me, and I
• 25:10
  Speaker 1: have a lot of gratitude for the ways that they
• 25:12
  Speaker 1: helped me get back fully. So I will be lining
• 25:15
  Speaker 1: up at the trials, which I'm so excited about. Just
• 25:18
  Speaker 1: a little bumm not to not to have more racing
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: under the belt and not to have had those opportunities
• 25:24
  Speaker 1: to really chase that standard.
• 25:26
  Speaker 3: How do you accept the things that you cannot change?
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: Oh, not as well as I would like sometimes or
• 25:32
  Speaker 1: not as quick as I would like.
• 25:34
  Speaker 2: I love that your first response is actually like talking
• 25:37
  Speaker 2: to me about how it works for you, not like
• 25:39
  Speaker 2: practice putting into practice what the logistics are.
• 25:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean I wish, I wish I was someone
• 25:47
  Speaker 1: who just had immediate acceptance. Like for me, it's usually
• 25:50
  Speaker 1: a little bit of an emotional process, like I get
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: like so sad, and then I'm like, okay, like have
• 26:00
  Speaker 1: got to like bring myself back to my center. Remember
• 26:04
  Speaker 1: why I'm doing this, Remember my values, Remember like to
• 26:07
  Speaker 1: keep gratitude at the center. And I love Buddhist philosophy
• 26:12
  Speaker 1: and so much of what resonates with me from Buddhism
• 26:15
  Speaker 1: is the art of letting things go and like non attachment.
• 26:19
  Speaker 1: So ultimately, after you know this process of trying to
• 26:23
  Speaker 1: process things, I can land on letting go of the
• 26:28
  Speaker 1: things outside of my control and trying to feel unattached
• 26:31
  Speaker 1: from outcomes and goals that are Yeah, like making the
• 26:37
  Speaker 1: Olympic team is a very outcome goal. Like I try
• 26:40
  Speaker 1: to let like be unattached to making the team and
• 26:42
  Speaker 1: be way more attached to you know, I'm going to
• 26:46
  Speaker 1: show up at the trials and how do I give
• 26:47
  Speaker 1: it my absolute best on that day and be really
• 26:49
  Speaker 1: proud of that because that's all I can do. So
• 26:52
  Speaker 1: it's it's a practice, and it's very unperfect.
• 26:55
  Speaker 3: You know what it makes me think of?
• 26:57
  Speaker 2: It makes me think of like goals and systems, right,
• 27:00
  Speaker 2: like goals typically, and I think it's James Clear that
• 27:03
  Speaker 2: said this, like goals are for people who care.
• 27:05
  Speaker 3: About winning only once.
• 27:07
  Speaker 2: But when you have a system, it's for someone who
• 27:10
  Speaker 2: either cares about winning repeatedly or has such a strong
• 27:14
  Speaker 2: sense of tie to their values that they can then
• 27:17
  Speaker 2: understand that the system is the point right. And so
• 27:21
  Speaker 2: for you, it's like you have these systems in place
• 27:24
  Speaker 2: that regardless of what happens with your goals, you can
• 27:27
  Speaker 2: come back.
• 27:28
  Speaker 3: To the system knowing that you're giving it your all.
• 27:31
  Speaker 1: Yes, that's yeah, that's exactly how I want to be.
• 27:35
  Speaker 1: Like I a couple of times a year, especially as
• 27:37
  Speaker 1: championship season comes around, I really try to touch base
• 27:41
  Speaker 1: with the way that I personally define success, because so
• 27:45
  Speaker 1: many people will try to define success for you, and
• 27:49
  Speaker 1: especially in an Olympic year, success is making the Olympic team,
• 27:52
  Speaker 1: or getting an Olympic medal, or some very like objectively
• 27:57
  Speaker 1: measured thing by society, and I really don't define personal
• 28:02
  Speaker 1: success by that. To me, success is all about process
• 28:06
  Speaker 1: and ownership and the way I conduct myself on a
• 28:09
  Speaker 1: daily basis and the way I show up at these
• 28:11
  Speaker 1: competitions and the way like I evaluate, like did I
• 28:15
  Speaker 1: give it my best? And you know, am I in
• 28:18
  Speaker 1: touch with my values? And am I living that way?
• 28:20
  Speaker 1: So at the end of the day, when I'm like,
• 28:22
  Speaker 1: all right, if I really stay true to my definition
• 28:25
  Speaker 1: of success, it's so separate from some outcome or some
• 28:30
  Speaker 1: destination and that makes me feel I don't know, way
• 28:34
  Speaker 1: more excited to just like do what I can and
• 28:37
  Speaker 1: let go of the rest.
• 28:39
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and still easier said than done, right, Like, yes, yes,
• 28:45
  Speaker 2: you can feel and be successful if you perform at
• 28:49
  Speaker 2: your best at the Olympic trials, But that doesn't mean
• 28:53
  Speaker 2: if you don't make the Olympic team that you'll be
• 28:57
  Speaker 2: one hundred percent jumping for joytal.
• 29:00
  Speaker 1: And that's that's I was talking about that with a
• 29:02
  Speaker 1: friend of you can feel like both things at once, right,
• 29:07
  Speaker 1: like really proud. Like so back in twenty twenty one,
• 29:10
  Speaker 1: when I was really doing some evaluation on how certain
• 29:15
  Speaker 1: outcomes might feel and how I like could stay true
• 29:17
  Speaker 1: to my definition of success. Like I was like, okay
• 29:20
  Speaker 1: if I got fourth place, but I know that was
• 29:22
  Speaker 1: everything I could do, Like I hope I would feel
• 29:26
  Speaker 1: super proud and would define that as success, but I
• 29:29
  Speaker 1: also know there would be some sadness that I like
• 29:32
  Speaker 1: miss making the Olympic team by one place, and and
• 29:36
  Speaker 1: I think that's totally there's space for that, right, Like
• 29:38
  Speaker 1: you can feel everything all at once, but ultimately, like
• 29:42
  Speaker 1: I do think that the way I want to always
• 29:47
  Speaker 1: like define my personal success is based on like my
• 29:53
  Speaker 1: values and the way that I see the way that
• 29:55
  Speaker 1: I performed and conducted myself. But don't get me wrong,
• 29:59
  Speaker 1: like the joy and the excitement and the honor that
• 30:03
  Speaker 1: comes from making the Olympic team, and just that like experiences,
• 30:07
  Speaker 1: it's okay to feel sad if you just miss it.
• 30:10
  Speaker 3: That word both, right.
• 30:12
  Speaker 2: There have been so many instances for me personally lately
• 30:17
  Speaker 2: where I am living in duality.
• 30:20
  Speaker 3: I just had a birthday.
• 30:21
  Speaker 2: I was so happy and grateful to celebrate it with friends,
• 30:25
  Speaker 2: many of which traveled very far to come, which was
• 30:28
  Speaker 2: completely unexpected and unnecessary because it wasn't like a big, round,
• 30:32
  Speaker 2: shiny number. But with that said, so blessed to have
• 30:35
  Speaker 2: their support and love. And also I got home at
• 30:39
  Speaker 2: the end of the weekend and walked in alone by
• 30:42
  Speaker 2: myself and felt like this deep sadness. I was like,
• 30:46
  Speaker 2: I'm here, I'm alone, all my people are gone, and
• 30:50
  Speaker 2: it was like I was both so grateful for my
• 30:52
  Speaker 2: experiences and also like profoundly sad about being home alone.
• 30:58
  Speaker 3: At the end of the day.
• 30:59
  Speaker 2: It's like, I can recognize that I have so much
• 31:02
  Speaker 2: excitement and joy and beauty and wonderful things happening for
• 31:05
  Speaker 2: me right now, and I can also experience completely normal
• 31:09
  Speaker 2: human emotions of feeling lonely and wondering what else is
• 31:12
  Speaker 2: going to happen in my life.
• 31:14
  Speaker 3: And so it's that word of both.
• 31:16
  Speaker 2: It's the sentiment of knowing that both is okay and
• 31:20
  Speaker 2: both is entirely normal to experience. You just have to
• 31:23
  Speaker 2: have compassion for yourself knowing that it's okay, it's okay
• 31:27
  Speaker 2: to experience both, and no one gets to articulate or
• 31:30
  Speaker 2: tell you like what emotion or path is right, that's
• 31:33
  Speaker 2: completely up to you.
• 31:34
  Speaker 1: One hundred percent, one hundred percent. I love I love
• 31:37
  Speaker 1: that story you just shared, because that really is like
• 31:40
  Speaker 1: the human experience and capacity and It's the beauty of
• 31:43
  Speaker 1: being human that we can experience so many emotions all
• 31:47
  Speaker 1: at once, and they can be really contrasting emotions. One
• 31:50
  Speaker 1: of my favorite books is written by an author named
• 31:54
  Speaker 1: Steph Katchidall, and her book's called Everything All at Once,
• 31:57
  Speaker 1: And it's like her journey of navigating grief and tragedy
• 32:02
  Speaker 1: but also joy and becoming and you can feel all
• 32:06
  Speaker 1: those things all at once, Like you can feel like
• 32:09
  Speaker 1: your life is so rich with friendship, and you can
• 32:11
  Speaker 1: also feel lonely, and you can experience that right at
• 32:15
  Speaker 1: the same time.
• 32:16
  Speaker 3: Right at the same time, right at the same time.
• 32:18
  Speaker 2: I would love, if it's okay with you to go
• 32:21
  Speaker 2: back and double click a little bit on your journey
• 32:24
  Speaker 2: to having your daughter. I know that it was complicated
• 32:27
  Speaker 2: and certainly had many hurdles. Now you're so happy to
• 32:30
  Speaker 2: be in this role, in this stage of your life.
• 32:33
  Speaker 3: We were chatting about themes of grief before.
• 32:36
  Speaker 2: Talk to me a little bit about how it felt
• 32:38
  Speaker 2: for you after you did miscarry the first time, knowing
• 32:42
  Speaker 2: that you did really want this so badly for your family.
• 32:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that was, honestly, that was the hardest and darkest
• 32:52
  Speaker 1: period of my life, because, yeah, I just I wanted
• 32:57
  Speaker 1: and wanted to meet that baby so badly, and I
• 32:59
  Speaker 1: wanted to be come a mom and I couldn't wait
• 33:02
  Speaker 1: to see my partner become a dad. And to experience
• 33:06
  Speaker 1: that loss was just, oh it was. It was traumatic,
• 33:11
  Speaker 1: Like it was a very physically and emotionally traumatic experience.
• 33:15
  Speaker 1: And yeah, I'll never really forget how tough and just
• 33:23
  Speaker 1: just challenging that was. And it paired with me as
• 33:26
  Speaker 1: a professional runner. It really highlighted that, you know, the
• 33:32
  Speaker 1: loss of this baby coincided with the loss of my
• 33:35
  Speaker 1: ability to pursue my passion because I couldn't I couldn't
• 33:38
  Speaker 1: race that season. I had just come off a year
• 33:42
  Speaker 1: where I made the Olympic team and I was at
• 33:44
  Speaker 1: the peak of my career and felt like I was
• 33:47
  Speaker 1: ready to run faster than I ever had, and we
• 33:51
  Speaker 1: got the pregnancy. Was a surprise, but it was the
• 33:54
  Speaker 1: happiest surprise, and I was like, all right, like, you know,
• 33:57
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna have to sit out this next season, and
• 34:01
  Speaker 1: which was already like sad in a way because I
• 34:03
  Speaker 1: was like so like love love love competing, So I
• 34:07
  Speaker 1: was like sad to miss to miss the racing season,
• 34:09
  Speaker 1: but it was for the best reason, you know, we
• 34:11
  Speaker 1: were growing a family. But when we lost that baby
• 34:16
  Speaker 1: or lost that pregnancy, it just also made me grieve
• 34:20
  Speaker 1: not being able to like do my job and to
• 34:23
  Speaker 1: do what I love even more So I really struggled
• 34:26
  Speaker 1: during that time. And I did some things well, and
• 34:33
  Speaker 1: I didn't do some things well, Like we talked earlier
• 34:35
  Speaker 1: about like really leaning on your people, and and I
• 34:38
  Speaker 1: did that, but I also think I needed to like
• 34:42
  Speaker 1: probably stick with myself and my feelings more like I
• 34:44
  Speaker 1: tried to just pour myself into other people and wasn't
• 34:49
  Speaker 1: probably like allowing myself to feel my pain in the
• 34:53
  Speaker 1: healthiest way, and it would come out in ways that
• 34:56
  Speaker 1: probably wasn't as healthy. And yeah, grief is Grief is
• 35:00
  Speaker 1: a really tricky thing because it can come up in
• 35:04
  Speaker 1: ways that we don't even understand and can affect relationships
• 35:08
  Speaker 1: in ways that we don't mean it too. So I uh, yeah,
• 35:13
  Speaker 1: I look back on that time and just acknowledge that
• 35:18
  Speaker 1: it was a super painful time in my life and
• 35:21
  Speaker 1: for my partner as well obviously, But it really made
• 35:25
  Speaker 1: me also see how much I wanted to pursue starting
• 35:29
  Speaker 1: our family and yeah, my husband and I, where is
• 35:33
  Speaker 1: that first pregnancy was a surprise. We were like, you know,
• 35:35
  Speaker 1: let's be all in on starting our family, and fortunately
• 35:39
  Speaker 1: we were able to get pregnant pretty quickly. And fast
• 35:42
  Speaker 1: forward to another year later. We welcomed Nova Nova to
• 35:46
  Speaker 1: Nova to the world in April of last year. You know,
• 35:49
  Speaker 1: so last year I also missed the track season, but
• 35:51
  Speaker 1: this time is for the best reason, and it has
• 35:54
  Speaker 1: been just the biggest gift and the biggest joy to
• 35:58
  Speaker 1: have her with us.
• 36:00
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 36:01
  Speaker 2: Wow, what a what a beautiful you know, commemoration of
• 36:05
  Speaker 2: what you've been through, and thank you for sharing that.
• 36:07
  Speaker 2: I think that it's so not only relatable to hear
• 36:13
  Speaker 2: about the struggles that you experienced, but also that really
• 36:19
  Speaker 2: intimate reflection that you have knowing that, hey, I handled
• 36:25
  Speaker 2: some things at times during this really difficult time for
• 36:30
  Speaker 2: me in a way that maybe looking back, I'm not
• 36:33
  Speaker 2: actually that proud of. But knowing that, recognizing that, and
• 36:37
  Speaker 2: then again learning from that, and I think that that
• 36:41
  Speaker 2: is what the important lesson is always from our most
• 36:45
  Speaker 2: difficult moments. It's like, if you have the opportunity to
• 36:49
  Speaker 2: at least learn from something, then it is up to
• 36:53
  Speaker 2: you to grab hold of that. It is entirely understandable
• 36:57
  Speaker 2: that when you're going through something that's extremely traumatic and
• 36:59
  Speaker 2: you're dealing with grief, that you might not act in
• 37:01
  Speaker 2: a way that always makes you proud. That happens, that's
• 37:05
  Speaker 2: being women. But what happens when you do have the
• 37:08
  Speaker 2: time to come back into yourself, do you have the
• 37:11
  Speaker 2: know how to look back and at least reflect on that?
• 37:14
  Speaker 2: I think that is really where the beauty is in
• 37:17
  Speaker 2: the most difficult things that we go through.
• 37:19
  Speaker 1: I agree, Yeah, thanks, thanks for saying all that, because
• 37:22
  Speaker 1: it's so true. I really I think I'm not a
• 37:26
  Speaker 1: fan of the phrase like everything happens for a reason,
• 37:29
  Speaker 1: but you can give meaning to the experiences that happen
• 37:34
  Speaker 1: or to the tragedies that occur, And that's like, that's
• 37:39
  Speaker 1: kind of the way I always want to navigate through things,
• 37:42
  Speaker 1: is not so much like looking for the reason behind,
• 37:45
  Speaker 1: Like you know, I really struggle with the idea that
• 37:47
  Speaker 1: children get cancer for a reason, or I mean, there's
• 37:50
  Speaker 1: so much, so much tragedy on this planet every day,
• 37:53
  Speaker 1: and I'm like, man, that is I don't think there
• 37:57
  Speaker 1: is necessarily a reason behind all of it. But how
• 38:00
  Speaker 1: can we make meaning from these really hard, traumatic things?
• 38:05
  Speaker 1: And hopefully we can you know, move forward in a
• 38:08
  Speaker 1: way that gives meaning to whatever tragedy happens.
• 38:12
  Speaker 2: So yeah, thanks, yeah, of course, and also like reflective
• 38:17
  Speaker 2: in the way that you move forward of the person
• 38:19
  Speaker 2: that you are and your values. We're going back to
• 38:22
  Speaker 2: the way that we determine success, like success after grief,
• 38:25
  Speaker 2: success after trauma is then you understanding how do I
• 38:29
  Speaker 2: move forward in a way that serves me and the
• 38:31
  Speaker 2: people that I care about. For you, now, a year
• 38:35
  Speaker 2: plus into motherhood, give me the peach and give me
• 38:39
  Speaker 2: the pit.
• 38:41
  Speaker 1: Oh gosh, it is better than I ever imagined. She is, like, yeah,
• 38:48
  Speaker 1: I can't I can't even put it in words, like
• 38:50
  Speaker 1: the feelings of Like I've heard people say like you
• 38:55
  Speaker 1: can't understand love like that until you experience it, and
• 38:58
  Speaker 1: I always thought that was like very cliche, But I'm like,
• 39:00
  Speaker 1: oh my gosh, I didn't know my heart could expand
• 39:04
  Speaker 1: and like feel the depth that it does just just
• 39:08
  Speaker 1: watching her and you know, she's almost fourteen months now,
• 39:12
  Speaker 1: and she just has such personality and is like so
• 39:17
  Speaker 1: playful and so goofy, and I could just like the
• 39:22
  Speaker 1: joy I get from watching her explore the world and
• 39:25
  Speaker 1: learn how to walk and interact with animals and it's yeah,
• 39:30
  Speaker 1: like she is the like if I'm ever feeling sad,
• 39:33
  Speaker 1: I like spend a couple of minutes with her and
• 39:35
  Speaker 1: snuggle her, and I'm like, oh man, my life is
• 39:37
  Speaker 1: it's this is the best, Like I yeah, like being
• 39:40
  Speaker 1: a mom will always be like the most important thing
• 39:45
  Speaker 1: I'll ever be And yeah, that's.
• 39:48
  Speaker 3: That's the peach.
• 39:49
  Speaker 1: The pit is. Uh, it's challenging, like especially as a
• 39:53
  Speaker 1: professional athlete, Like you know, I used to like really
• 39:57
  Speaker 1: protect my sleep and be like all right, like I am.
• 40:00
  Speaker 1: Sleep is such a performance enhancer, and this past year
• 40:04
  Speaker 1: my sleep has been so compromised and so all over
• 40:07
  Speaker 1: the place. And that is challenging when it comes to
• 40:12
  Speaker 1: trying to train and and perform at an Olympic caliber
• 40:16
  Speaker 1: level level. And then yeah, there's just other like minor
• 40:20
  Speaker 1: challenges that that don't feel I don't know, they're not
• 40:24
  Speaker 1: that big of a deal, but you know, like traveling
• 40:25
  Speaker 1: with a baby is definitely a very like different thing
• 40:29
  Speaker 1: than when you're just traveling on your own. And and
• 40:32
  Speaker 1: like you know, she's going through developmental stages that can
• 40:35
  Speaker 1: be like hard and confusing for her, like when she
• 40:38
  Speaker 1: gets teething pains or when she gets a cold, like
• 40:41
  Speaker 1: it's just you can like see she's uncomfortable and like
• 40:44
  Speaker 1: can't explain it. So yeah, anyways, I could like ramble
• 40:47
  Speaker 1: on and on and on about this past year and
• 40:51
  Speaker 1: the joys, the highs and and the hardships, but it
• 40:54
  Speaker 1: is it is, oh man, I can't imagine life without her.
• 40:58
  Speaker 3: It's it's the best. It's the best, you know.
• 41:01
  Speaker 2: It's so interesting also hearing about all of the different
• 41:04
  Speaker 2: things that you need to take into account or now
• 41:06
  Speaker 2: that you experienced because you've chosen to expand your family
• 41:09
  Speaker 2: and also continue to.
• 41:11
  Speaker 3: Compete at this level.
• 41:14
  Speaker 2: Not all that long ago, I was at Campstrava and
• 41:17
  Speaker 2: Gabby Thomas gave the keynote, and she's talking about how
• 41:21
  Speaker 2: it is without negotiation that every night she does get
• 41:24
  Speaker 2: between eight and nine hours of sleep. And this is
• 41:27
  Speaker 2: someone who has had her own fair set of challenges,
• 41:30
  Speaker 2: but very different than yours. And so it's interesting to
• 41:33
  Speaker 2: think about the choices that many women make, especially within
• 41:37
  Speaker 2: running as they get older, and the fact that these
• 41:41
  Speaker 2: days it is not all that common to see many
• 41:44
  Speaker 2: mothers showing up towing the line to compete in their
• 41:49
  Speaker 2: chosen event. Whether we're talking about someone like Alison Felix
• 41:53
  Speaker 2: who did it in the shorter distances, or you know,
• 41:56
  Speaker 2: all the way up to the marathon and beyond with
• 41:58
  Speaker 2: Kira Demato. For you being in such good company, now,
• 42:02
  Speaker 2: how does it feel for you to see other mothers
• 42:05
  Speaker 2: out there going after it alongside you.
• 42:08
  Speaker 1: I'm so happy you asked that it is. It's then
• 42:12
  Speaker 1: so beautiful to do this alongside so many other phenomenal
• 42:18
  Speaker 1: professional runners. Like it really does feel like there's kind
• 42:21
  Speaker 1: of been this like shift in the way that we
• 42:25
  Speaker 1: are supporting mothers and female athletes, and it's not the
• 42:29
  Speaker 1: end of our careers, Like it's actually just it's a
• 42:33
  Speaker 1: it's a chapter and we can come back stronger and
• 42:37
  Speaker 1: we can we can pursue both, and we can pursue
• 42:40
  Speaker 1: both at a really high level. I really look up
• 42:43
  Speaker 1: to like Ellie Saint Pierre and Abby dou Gastino and
• 42:46
  Speaker 1: people that came before us to like Steph Bruce and
• 42:49
  Speaker 1: Sarah Hall and so many, so many women faith Kippie Hagen.
• 42:53
  Speaker 1: I mean, there are countless female mother athletes who have
• 42:58
  Speaker 1: paved the way and who are choosing to like put
• 43:02
  Speaker 1: their running career on hold very temporarily and then continue
• 43:06
  Speaker 1: to like pursue it at the highest of levels, and
• 43:09
  Speaker 1: I love that I am not unique in this like
• 43:13
  Speaker 1: it is. It is like you're saying, like, there's a
• 43:15
  Speaker 1: lot of other women who are doing this, and it's
• 43:17
  Speaker 1: been really fun to share share our journeys together. Just
• 43:20
  Speaker 1: the other week, Abby Augustino and Ellie Saint Pierre and
• 43:23
  Speaker 1: I all got our babies together because they were in
• 43:25
  Speaker 1: flag staff training and we just had so much fun
• 43:28
  Speaker 1: seeing our kids like in the park and talking about
• 43:31
  Speaker 1: motherhood and a little bit about running. But it's a
• 43:34
  Speaker 1: gift to share it and to be influenced by them.
• 43:37
  Speaker 1: And I've also just want to give a huge shout
• 43:40
  Speaker 1: out to the other like amazing, amazing moms in my
• 43:44
  Speaker 1: inner circle who have been the biggest source of inspiration,
• 43:48
  Speaker 1: like my own mom, my mother in law, my sister,
• 43:51
  Speaker 1: and my sister in laws are like the strongest, most
• 43:56
  Speaker 1: incredible women who have also pursued careers throughout their motherhood
• 44:00
  Speaker 1: journey and like shown me that you can you can
• 44:03
  Speaker 1: do both, and you can do both really really well.
• 44:06
  Speaker 1: And I just have so much appreciation for having such
• 44:10
  Speaker 1: amazing role models in my life.
• 44:12
  Speaker 2: So many amazing women to look up to and to
• 44:15
  Speaker 2: lean on as well.
• 44:16
  Speaker 3: You mentioned the word chapter.
• 44:18
  Speaker 2: Have you had to give this chapter of your life
• 44:21
  Speaker 2: right now a title?
• 44:23
  Speaker 3: Rachel, what would you give it?
• 44:26
  Speaker 1: Love that question?
• 44:29
  Speaker 3: Man? I would?
• 44:29
  Speaker 1: I want to spend some time on that.
• 44:31
  Speaker 2: But man, looking from the outside, looking in, like I
• 44:37
  Speaker 2: just feel as though there's so much tenacity, and you
• 44:45
  Speaker 2: have such a tenacious nature about you. I hear about
• 44:49
  Speaker 2: your passion and your drive, and it's like as many
• 44:52
  Speaker 2: hurdles that have been thrown your way since the last
• 44:55
  Speaker 2: Olympic cycle, you've shown up time and time again with
• 45:00
  Speaker 2: such a persistent and optimistic lens when it didn't always
• 45:06
  Speaker 2: feel that way for you. And so I guess that's why,
• 45:09
  Speaker 2: at least from my pov, I look at this chapter
• 45:13
  Speaker 2: as tenacity.
• 45:16
  Speaker 3: I like it. We'll go with that here. I am.
• 45:20
  Speaker 2: I love it tenacity.
• 45:24
  Speaker 1: I'm not planning on writing a book, but if I ever.
• 45:26
  Speaker 2: Was, I'm here to help. I'm here to help first
• 45:30
  Speaker 2: writing at a call, all right, the Tenacity chapter. The
• 45:34
  Speaker 2: question then comes whether or not you make this Olympic team,
• 45:38
  Speaker 2: and obviously we're rooting for you to do. So what
• 45:40
  Speaker 2: do you foresee the plan to be after this summer?
• 45:45
  Speaker 1: You know, I probably almost live in the present to
• 45:48
  Speaker 1: a like fault. My husband and I are not the
• 45:51
  Speaker 1: best at like planning too far ahead. But I missed
• 45:56
  Speaker 1: racing so so much while I was Yeah, from the
• 46:00
  Speaker 1: Glass Olympics to hear, I really missed it. So I
• 46:04
  Speaker 1: am looking forward to some really good racing throughout the
• 46:08
  Speaker 1: summer in the fall. Whether that's on the track or
• 46:11
  Speaker 1: the road's probably a combination of both, but looking forward
• 46:15
  Speaker 1: to that, looking forward to a lot of quality time
• 46:17
  Speaker 1: with family and friends. I definitely am, yeah, craving that
• 46:22
  Speaker 1: this summer. And Mike already has an athlete and he's
• 46:26
  Speaker 1: a dear teammate of mine. Luis Garhalva has already made
• 46:30
  Speaker 1: the Olympic team, and they're a handful of others that
• 46:33
  Speaker 1: we work with who have really awesome shots at making
• 46:36
  Speaker 1: it to Paris. So whether I'm on the team or not,
• 46:38
  Speaker 1: I really hope to be in Paris, supporting, supporting friends,
• 46:42
  Speaker 1: and supporting my partner. He is like the most amazing,
• 46:47
  Speaker 1: selfless coach and father and partner of Yeah, it's a
• 46:52
  Speaker 1: huge gift to witness his work and I would love
• 46:55
  Speaker 1: to be there, like on the sidelines, if not on
• 46:58
  Speaker 1: the track. So yeah, looking forward to Paris looking forward
• 47:01
  Speaker 1: to personal racing, and yeah, you.
• 47:04
  Speaker 2: Know that's a really interesting attitude because yes, I would
• 47:08
  Speaker 2: also want to go to Paris support my partner. Totally understandable,
• 47:13
  Speaker 2: But depending on what happens, could that be a difficult
• 47:17
  Speaker 2: thing for you?
• 47:18
  Speaker 3: Absolutely?
• 47:19
  Speaker 1: The last two years have had actually quite a bit
• 47:21
  Speaker 1: of practice in that, in like really being able to
• 47:25
  Speaker 1: feel these two things at once, like genuine joy and
• 47:28
  Speaker 1: excitement and just like pride for what my partner and
• 47:33
  Speaker 1: my friends are doing, and like I feel like their
• 47:36
  Speaker 1: successes are in some ways like my successes, like I
• 47:39
  Speaker 1: can feel them so deeply as even though they're not mine.
• 47:44
  Speaker 1: But then there's also sometimes the sadness of oh I
• 47:46
  Speaker 1: so want to be out there and this heartbreak of
• 47:50
  Speaker 1: not getting to do what you want to do. So
• 47:53
  Speaker 1: it can be both at once, but I'm sure it
• 47:55
  Speaker 1: would have its hard moments of like, you know, I
• 47:58
  Speaker 1: got so close to being back on the Olympic stage,
• 48:01
  Speaker 1: and if I'm not there, There'll probably be some sadness,
• 48:04
  Speaker 1: but then also some really really genuine deep joy for
• 48:08
  Speaker 1: my friends and for my partner.
• 48:10
  Speaker 3: Genuine deep joy.
• 48:12
  Speaker 2: You know, you have been so eloquent in talking about
• 48:15
  Speaker 2: the highs and the lows from the last year. When
• 48:18
  Speaker 2: you think about these friends that have helped carry you
• 48:22
  Speaker 2: through this journey, what would you say some of the
• 48:25
  Speaker 2: best advice has been that you've been offered as you
• 48:28
  Speaker 2: got back into the swing of things.
• 48:30
  Speaker 1: Honestly, the best advice sometimes comes from people not in
• 48:34
  Speaker 1: the sport and not in the circle, and they're like
• 48:37
  Speaker 1: the ones that can like really almost have like this
• 48:41
  Speaker 1: refreshing perspective and help you step outside of it and
• 48:44
  Speaker 1: really just offer wisdom that I so need to hear,
• 48:47
  Speaker 1: because when you're in it, it's hard to see that. Like,
• 48:50
  Speaker 1: sometimes it really is so smart to just like remind
• 48:53
  Speaker 1: yourself that, like you're on your own journey or not
• 48:55
  Speaker 1: on anybody else's, and all you can do is, like, folks,
• 48:58
  Speaker 1: on the things in your control. And that's honestly, some
• 49:02
  Speaker 1: of the best advice is to just like not compare
• 49:05
  Speaker 1: yourself to previous versions of yourself and not compare yourself
• 49:08
  Speaker 1: to anyone else, and to just focus on what you
• 49:10
  Speaker 1: can do each day, and then ultimately to just really
• 49:14
  Speaker 1: like have deep appreciation for it and remember that it's
• 49:18
  Speaker 1: a it's a gift to be able to do this,
• 49:19
  Speaker 1: and especially to be able to do this with my
• 49:22
  Speaker 1: husband and my daughter and my extended family and friends
• 49:25
  Speaker 1: all in it with me.
• 49:27
  Speaker 3: Definitely.
• 49:28
  Speaker 2: Now someone comes to your Instagram page, they see a
• 49:31
  Speaker 2: professional runner and a mom and someone who has big
• 49:35
  Speaker 2: Olympic dreams. When you look in the mirror, Rachel, what
• 49:38
  Speaker 2: is it that you see looking back at you.
• 49:41
  Speaker 1: I see someone who's trying, like I I think when
• 49:45
  Speaker 1: I see myself, I say, it's it's far far from perfection.
• 49:50
  Speaker 1: Sometimes I'm like, oh, man, like you could be doing
• 49:53
  Speaker 1: this and this and this better or but you know,
• 49:55
  Speaker 1: I know I'm trying, and I'm trying hard, and I'm
• 49:59
  Speaker 1: trying in a way that I I feel really proud of.
• 50:01
  Speaker 1: Like I really feel like this past year, I've put
• 50:04
  Speaker 1: my daughter and my family as my number one priority
• 50:08
  Speaker 1: and I'm really proud of that. And then I have
• 50:11
  Speaker 1: tried really really hard to get back to my passion
• 50:14
  Speaker 1: and to do it at a high level. And I
• 50:17
  Speaker 1: feel really proud of the way that, Yeah, I've poured
• 50:21
  Speaker 1: my heart into things I value.
• 50:23
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that's so special to hear.
• 50:25
  Speaker 2: And also, like I hear in the way that you speak,
• 50:28
  Speaker 2: like the amount of effort that has gone into that try, right,
• 50:32
  Speaker 2: Like it hasn't been easy, but you didn't sign up
• 50:35
  Speaker 2: for easy.
• 50:36
  Speaker 3: For so many.
• 50:37
  Speaker 2: People who can sympathize with that, I'm really trying here
• 50:41
  Speaker 2: and sometimes feel like they get knocked down by how
• 50:43
  Speaker 2: difficult it is. How do you keep trying? Where do
• 50:48
  Speaker 2: you feel like that resilience comes from?
• 50:51
  Speaker 1: Ah, that's an awesome question. I really feel like I've
• 50:54
  Speaker 1: learned that and seen it modeled in my family ever
• 50:57
  Speaker 1: since I was young, and I I really think there's
• 51:02
  Speaker 1: so many examples of resiliency in my siblings, in my parents,
• 51:06
  Speaker 1: in my partner, in my friends who I almost don't
• 51:10
  Speaker 1: know any other way but to try and to pour
• 51:14
  Speaker 1: my heart and my effort into the people and the
• 51:18
  Speaker 1: passions that I'm pursuing.
• 51:20
  Speaker 2: Yeah, comes from family. I absolutely love to hear that well.
• 51:24
  Speaker 2: As you know, we are excited to cheer you on
• 51:27
  Speaker 2: this episode is coming out on the day of the
• 51:29
  Speaker 2: final I am going to be in Eugene and I'll
• 51:33
  Speaker 2: be cheering for you. So I'm so excited to not
• 51:36
  Speaker 2: only follow you along in this chapter of your journey,
• 51:38
  Speaker 2: but continue to follow along as we progress, not only
• 51:42
  Speaker 2: in this summer but beyond. For those that don't follow
• 51:46
  Speaker 2: along with you, just yet Rachel give us the info,
• 51:49
  Speaker 2: how do they keep up with you?
• 51:50
  Speaker 3: Tell us everything?
• 51:52
  Speaker 1: Well, thank you for all the support and the cheers.
• 51:54
  Speaker 1: I'll take all the good vibes I can get heading
• 51:56
  Speaker 1: into the trials and hopefully fingers cross in that final.
• 52:00
  Speaker 1: I'm on Instagram at rach Schneid eighteen and outside of that,
• 52:04
  Speaker 1: I'm really not on any other platforms.
• 52:08
  Speaker 3: I'd feel like Instagram is my go to right now.
• 52:11
  Speaker 2: If you had to offer yourself a piece of advice
• 52:14
  Speaker 2: looking back on the toughest moments within the last few years,
• 52:19
  Speaker 2: knowing what you know now, what would you say to yourself.
• 52:23
  Speaker 1: I would really want myself to be super present at
• 52:27
  Speaker 1: the trials and to soak it all in because I
• 52:31
  Speaker 1: wasn't able to race at the last two outdoor ussays
• 52:34
  Speaker 1: and I so badly missed it and I wanted to
• 52:36
  Speaker 1: be out there. So even though I know I will
• 52:39
  Speaker 1: be feeling all the nerves on that start line and
• 52:42
  Speaker 1: in the lead up to it, I keep reminding myself,
• 52:45
  Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, make sure that you like just take
• 52:47
  Speaker 1: moments to soak it in and appreciate it and to
• 52:51
  Speaker 1: just like actually feel the joy and the yeah, all
• 52:55
  Speaker 1: the good stuff that comes from getting to be out
• 52:57
  Speaker 1: there and not get consumed by the nerves or the
• 53:00
  Speaker 1: anxiety or any of the tough stuff.
• 53:03
  Speaker 3: Like all the good stuff, all the good stuff ahead
• 53:06
  Speaker 3: for you.
• 53:06
  Speaker 2: I'm over at Hurdle Podcast and at Emily Abodi another
• 53:10
  Speaker 2: hurdle conquered.
• 53:11
  Speaker 3: Catch you guys next time.