Latest / Networking Unleashed: Building Profitable Connections / Networking Unleashed: An Interview with Lee Baucom and Michael A Forman, Professional Speaker

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Networking Unleashed: An Interview with Lee Baucom and Michael A Forman, Professional Speaker · Networking Unleashed: Building Profitable Connections

0:16
Welcome to Networking Unleashed, Building Profitable
0:20
Connections, the show where clarity creates opportunity
0:23
and focus fuels growth. I'm your host, Michael
0:28
Forman, and today's episode is a must -listen
0:31
for authors, entrepreneurs, and anyone who thinks
0:35
a book alone will build their business. Publishing
0:38
a book doesn't finish the race. It fires the
0:42
starting gun. Yet so many people misuse their
0:45
book, confuse their message, and spread themselves
0:49
thin trying to do everything at once. My guest
0:53
today has seen it from the inside. He knows why
0:56
a book should open doors, not create noise, and
0:59
why focus is the difference between being busy
1:02
and being profitable. We're breaking down how
1:06
a book should work in your networking, how it
1:09
should guide conversations, and why doing less
1:12
on purpose often creates more opportunity. If
1:16
you want your book to connect, you came to the
1:19
right people in the right place. You want your
1:22
business to grow with intention, again, you're
1:25
in the right place. Let's get into it. I'd like
1:27
to welcome to the podcast, Lee. I am so looking
1:30
forward to your podcast because... As you can
1:35
see, I've written two books and I'm sure I'm
1:38
not using them correctly. So I'm very interested
1:41
in what you have to say. So Lee, welcome to the
1:44
podcast and give us a little background of what
1:47
you've done. First, Michael, thank you for having
1:50
me. I'm excited to be here. You know, networking
1:52
is part of what a book does for you. So let me
1:55
set the scene a little bit for how I got to this
1:57
point. And some of this is accidental and I don't
2:01
want others to make that same mistake. Let's
2:03
zoom back to start. I was trained as a therapist
2:06
and I specialized in marriage and family therapy.
2:10
And what I realized is marriage and family therapy
2:12
is not particularly effective. So I moved from
2:16
there to coaching. We can talk about that, but
2:18
it's not a big piece of the business thing. It's
2:20
just an interesting fact that dissuaded me from
2:23
staying in that field. Now, I continue to see
2:26
people, but I was working with them as a coach.
2:29
And my whole endeavor at that point was to figure
2:31
out what helps people actually have a good marriage.
2:35
And I started writing that. My intention was
2:38
to write a book basically because I wanted to
2:42
frame what I did and understand it further and
2:44
use that as a resource document. And also because
2:47
I figured it would be helpful for being in practice.
2:51
And so I put it out. Back to 1998, I was writing
2:57
and talking with this person who had done some
3:00
writing. And he said, so what are you going to
3:01
do with your book? I said, well, I'm going to
3:03
get it published, get it to a publisher. And
3:05
he said, well, between now and then, what are
3:07
you going to do? And I said, wait. And his answer
3:11
was, why don't you put it on the Internet? 1998
3:14
-99 was early in the days of doing much worthwhile
3:18
on the Internet. My website that I created looked
3:21
horrible. And I didn't actually believe it would
3:24
work. So it was December of 1999, and I punched
3:30
for the website to go live. And we packed everything
3:35
up. This was back in the days, they call it a
3:37
laptop, but it was a brick that sat on your lap.
3:39
I mean, it was heavy. And so it mostly just was
3:44
a portable computer for me. And so I took my
3:46
portable computer and we marched from where we
3:49
were in Kentucky to my in -laws in North Carolina.
3:53
Got there late, but I was just like really curious.
3:57
So unplugged their phone cord, stretched another
4:00
cord all the way around, got the dial -up tone,
4:04
and watched as I got notifications that my book
4:08
was selling. And so to my surprise, I had started
4:12
this process. So fast forward, and that book,
4:16
that was an e -book. Because that's what we called
4:19
it then. And Amazon didn't have e -books back
4:23
then. So it was an e -book. And then Amazon suddenly
4:26
had e -books. And I went, oh, no, no, it's not
4:28
an e -book because those are now 99 cent on Amazon.
4:31
It's changed now. But back then it was how they
4:35
kind of broke the ground. And so I developed
4:38
that further, almost by necessity to get away
4:40
from the e -book title and created a much more
4:43
robust system for people to use. And what I accidentally
4:47
did is I launched a business. I started finding
4:50
people coming to me, and I started listening.
4:54
So now that e -book not counted, there's seven
4:56
other books and a couple of journals I've created,
4:59
plus other programs online, basically as build
5:03
-outs from that. And so what I realized along
5:07
the way, and that's how we get to here, is that
5:09
books can launch a business, but most people
5:13
don't know. how to do that. In fact, most people
5:16
think they wrote the book, they're done. You're
5:19
proof that that's not what you're doing because
5:21
you're taking that and furthering that in the
5:23
podcast in other ways. But a lot of people, you
5:26
know, I've talked to people and they're like,
5:27
well, I'm 95 % of the way done. I'm almost finished
5:29
the book. I'm like, you're 5 % done. You're just
5:32
starting. And when you think the book is just
5:36
going to do it for you. So there are two frames
5:38
that I see. One is people go, it's just a book.
5:41
I'll go and meet with authors at different events.
5:44
And I'm like, what's your plan after the book?
5:47
And they're like, what do you mean? The book
5:48
is going to do it. We can talk about the reality
5:51
of book sales a little bit further on, but that's.
5:55
Not where it's going to happen for people first.
5:58
And so then the other mistake they make is they
6:03
just think it's going to unfold naturally. People
6:06
are going to start calling and they're going
6:08
to have these natural opportunities instead of
6:10
being intentional about how they set it up. That's
6:14
the kind of a pivot. I still do the relationship
6:16
work, but I realized I kept helping authors out
6:19
and they kept coming to me one by one. And I
6:21
went, let's do this in a formal way that more
6:24
authors can take advantage. And so that's part
6:27
of the book to business blueprint that I've been
6:30
talking about lately. So anyway, that's more
6:33
than a little nutshell, but that'll get you up
6:36
to where we are. Absolutely. I use my books more
6:41
as a calling card when I'm speaking in workshops
6:45
and keynote speeches or just anything. If I walk
6:49
into a business and I'm teaching them how to
6:52
network, I always include the book as part of
6:57
my price. So if I have 50 people, then I'm ordering
7:00
50 books for them. And so they have it on their
7:03
desk while I'm teaching them. So they have a
7:06
resource. So that's that's one way. And that's
7:09
the way that I've been using it, you know, ever
7:11
since. So before you go on, before you go on
7:14
there, just to clarify for some people who aren't
7:16
aren't aware of this, when you do that. So you
7:20
I'm assuming you make some. some amount of money
7:23
per book. What a lot of people don't realize
7:25
is when they're doing that speaking, that comes
7:28
from a different fund than the speaker often.
7:31
And so a company will have this resource fund,
7:34
the speaker's fund and the resource fund, and
7:36
they can actually draw from two funds to pay
7:39
you and sometimes make a better deal for you.
7:43
And sometimes even find a way of matching what
7:46
you want to charge for the speaking, but they
7:48
aren't able to do by doing the resources. Exactly.
7:53
And I could have said it better myself, because
7:55
there are times when they want to pay me a certain
7:58
amount, but a portion of it will come out of
8:02
a different fund, which you just said, and I'll
8:05
include the book. So it all works together. It's
8:08
very interesting, by the way. Okay, so let me
8:11
start out by saying, by asking, you say a book
8:16
is the start of a business, not the finish line.
8:19
How should professionals think differently about
8:22
networking once they become authors? One of the
8:28
things that I point out, and it's probably the
8:30
most obvious thing I point out that a lot of
8:32
people go, I haven't noticed that, is the first
8:34
part of the word authority, which is what you
8:36
need when you're networking, trying to get attention,
8:38
is author. So when you are author, you have authority
8:43
based on the fact that you were able to create
8:46
the book. Now, it used to be that we had these
8:49
kind of, you had to break through, you had to
8:51
get to a publisher and they would kind of give
8:53
you their blessing that whatever you'd written
8:56
was. enough. That's no longer the case. I mean,
8:59
if you want to write a book and get it published
9:01
these days, there are multiple ways to do that.
9:04
So you're automatically able to build the authority
9:07
if you're willing to put in the time to create
9:10
the book. And so now you have authority in that
9:15
position. That's the beginning point. To be able
9:19
to say, I wrote a book because I'm an expert
9:21
in this area, you don't even have to say. You
9:24
just have a book. Hey, I'm the author of this
9:26
book. That goes a long way. I mean, if somebody
9:29
hands you a book these days, it still carries
9:32
weight. that meant something that they have a
9:35
book. So in terms of networking, it used to be
9:39
pull out a business card. And do you remember
9:41
the, all the fancy business card stuff they would
9:43
do and they start putting codes on it and it
9:46
would, you know, have RFD stuff on all that stuff.
9:50
Okay, so a book is a business card. As long as
9:54
you have made sure that you've got your contact
9:57
information in it, it is a business card. And
9:59
it's way more powerful than the fanciest card
10:02
you could do because now they have a way of thinking
10:05
about it. I've been to conferences and collected
10:08
the business cards. In fact, I just moved them.
10:11
They're over there in a big pile. And then I've
10:14
got some books that people have handed me. And
10:17
guess which one got attention? It wasn't the
10:19
business cards. I read their books or at least
10:22
skimmed their books. That's a bigger impact than
10:25
here's my card. Absolutely. And the book to me
10:30
is the next level. So when people are first going
10:35
to networking events, you know, it used to be
10:38
pre -pandemic. It used to be transactional. business
10:43
cards or I have three widgets, they have $5,
10:46
we'll switch it and you're a customer. We've
10:49
gone more customer and transactional to relational
10:54
after the pandemic because I have to get to know
10:57
you. Know you like you trust you, they'll do
11:00
business with you. And so now when I go to a
11:03
networking event, I collect maybe 15 cards because
11:07
I know I had a relationship with that person.
11:11
And I did this whole thing with follow up and
11:13
everything else, which is just as important.
11:15
But nothing says you're an expert more than saying
11:20
I wrote this book. So I agree with you 100 percent
11:25
on all the lines. Let me I'll give you an example
11:28
of that. I had a person who I had worked with
11:31
and he's trying to figure out how to use the
11:33
book and how to position it. And, you know, my
11:36
thing was, let's do it quietly. So this guy was
11:38
a consultant. And he was in the office of a president
11:42
of a company who was trying his best to get the
11:45
cheapest option available. And so he was doing
11:47
this competitive thing. You know, I've got these
11:49
two people. Why should I choose you? And he wanted
11:52
price point. And my guy, the author, as he's
11:57
talking, he said, so why should I choose you?
11:58
And he was just waiting for the low offer. My
12:02
guy pulls out the book and said, because I wrote
12:04
a book on this. And he dropped it on his desk
12:06
and said, if you're interested in me helping
12:08
you. Let me know my information's in there. And
12:11
he left. There was no, I'll give you the lowest
12:14
price. He came in as I'm the expert in this so
12:17
much so that I wrote the book on this and that
12:20
sealed the deal. The other person might have
12:22
been brilliant, but he didn't have a book. And
12:27
the book is what turned the deal. Absolutely.
12:30
Absolutely. And very close to that scenario.
12:35
It's helped me countless times. It really does.
12:39
So I agree 100%. I never talk dollars. When I'm
12:45
consulting or I'm educating or I'm putting a
12:48
class together, I never talk dollars. I always
12:51
talk experience and being an author. Where do
12:57
you see authors misusing their book in networking
13:00
conversation and unintentionally limiting their
13:04
opportunities? So there are different levels
13:08
to that. But let me just pick one. I see a lot
13:10
of people that if they were in a normal situation
13:13
would have a conversation about a topic. And
13:18
instead they'll say, well, that's in my book.
13:20
And they'll just leave it at that and expect
13:22
the person is going to go do it. Here is the
13:24
reality for a book. Not many people are A, going
13:30
to buy it. and be going to read it. I mean, that's
13:33
the news of this. That doesn't mean it's not
13:36
valuable. It still has power in just being able
13:38
to say, I wrote this book. And when somebody
13:42
has a book, they feel like they've done something.
13:45
But if you want them to know something, you can't
13:49
count on them going to the book. So a mistake
13:52
is relying too much on the book instead of the
13:55
conversation and relationship. I think another
13:58
mistake is assuming that this is going to be
14:02
the easy answer for people. People come for different
14:06
reasons. Some people aren't at the point of needing,
14:09
for instance, what I do but they might down the
14:13
road. And the book is still back there. Business
14:16
card, who knows? But the book is often still
14:18
back there. So forgetting that this is a long
14:21
-term venture is another mistake people make.
14:25
One of the big ones I see, though, is when people
14:28
assume that they know what the book is going
14:32
to create in the business. So I said I was an
14:34
accidental entrepreneur. We have multiple pieces
14:38
of the business that I never imagined. from the
14:43
book just itself, I could see the straight shot.
14:47
What I didn't see are the several things along
14:50
the way that came out of that. And so a mistake
14:54
that a lot of authors make is not listening for
14:58
what's possible, listening to the people around
15:01
them, the readers often, mining that for what
15:05
are the opportunities and just making an assumption
15:08
about what rolls out from it. That's that's absolutely
15:12
true. You know, you can't be closed minded about
15:16
your book. You know, you you're not the end all.
15:19
You don't know everything. There's always something
15:22
else that you say, oh, I should have added that
15:25
to the book or I could add that to volume two
15:28
or something else. But you have to keep your
15:30
eyes and ears open because there's like 15 things
15:34
going on around you. You have your conversation,
15:37
but you can be picking up. Something else is
15:41
going on. And then afterwards, when you go speak
15:44
to, I'll say the person and they expand on that
15:47
thought, like, I never thought about that. I
15:50
never thought about, because that will go nicely
15:53
with what I wrote, what I wrote, what I wrote
15:55
down. Yeah. So there's, there's the backside
15:58
of that too. I've often seen authors when they
16:02
are in that mindset of listening, that everything
16:04
is like the next thing. And not everything is
16:08
the next thing. There are some things that you
16:10
have to be able to say, interesting, and I hear
16:14
that, but that's not what I want to do. So part
16:18
of what is nice about an author building a business
16:21
from their book is they get to decide what that
16:23
business looks like. For you speaking, you like
16:27
that. There are plenty of people who absolutely
16:29
do not want to do that. And so they start hearing
16:33
from people, oh, we want you to come speak. That's
16:35
tempting. But if that's not really what speaks
16:39
to you, that's not going to work. And the same
16:42
for consulting. Maybe you don't want to do consulting.
16:44
Maybe you want to do something else. And so there
16:47
are all these different opportunities that start
16:49
coming out of it. And you've got to be able to
16:51
separate the signal from the noise. And that's
16:54
a learned skill. I'll watch a lot of people chase
16:56
what they thought was like the silver object.
17:00
It comes along and they're like, oh, let's go
17:01
after that. And then they start down and go,
17:04
wait, I don't. I don't want to do that or that
17:07
takes me in a whole different direction. And
17:09
so to be aware of that is so critical. Years
17:13
ago, I was working at a counseling center and
17:15
I was watching them deal with their fundraising.
17:19
And the board was going, oh, we could. And I
17:21
was in this board meeting watching it just from
17:23
the side. We could do this. And they kept going
17:25
on with these ideas that they would get all pumped
17:28
about. And finally, this one person said, why
17:32
don't we just sell drugs? And it stopped the
17:37
whole crowd. And they were like, what? He said,
17:38
just stand on the corner and sell drugs. And
17:40
they were like, why would we do that? And he
17:42
said, well, that's what I'm wondering about all
17:43
the other answers I'm getting here. All of them
17:46
are taking us away from what is our core. We
17:50
need to talk about what our core is. And so that
17:53
is true for the authorpreneur, too, the person
17:57
who wants to build their business from the book.
18:00
They need to be able to go, oh, that's a signal
18:03
of where I could go with this, as opposed to
18:05
that's noise that takes me away from my core.
18:09
So mistakes on each side of not listening for
18:11
the signal and listening too much to the noise.
18:16
You said it, and you said for the same thing
18:18
on both sides. You're listening, but you have
18:21
to listen to yourself, and you have to focus
18:25
on what you want to do and what the task is at
18:28
hand. You can always go off into eight different
18:31
directions, but you have to have the mindset
18:34
to keep yourself focused, and that takes a lot
18:38
of practice. Yeah. How does a book change the
18:44
quality of the rooms you're invited into and
18:48
the conversations that you're able to have? Yeah,
18:52
it's that authority again. You're building that
18:55
authority based on the fact. And I don't think
18:58
it's an overestimation for our culture to think
19:01
that someone wrote a book on it. They have something.
19:03
I think we recognize that if you wrote a book,
19:07
you spent some time. There are some interesting
19:10
statistics on how many people say they want to
19:12
write a book. It is the vast majority of people
19:14
say they want to write a book. The number of
19:17
people who write a book, very small. And the
19:20
number of people who write a book that can create
19:24
their whole business is even smaller, but not
19:28
because it wasn't there. It's just because they
19:30
didn't see it. And then there are some books
19:33
that are just written like a memoir. Probably
19:35
not going to be the start of a business. Could
19:37
be, but it might not be. Fiction, probably not.
19:40
I had this question the other day from someone
19:41
who said, well, I don't know. I mean, I wrote
19:43
fiction. How would that apply to me? And my response
19:45
was, have you thought about teaching people how
19:49
you did that? I mean, that's a possibility because
19:52
I watch your creative process and it's pretty
19:54
amazing. And I had another that came to me and
19:56
said, you know, I am really good at telling somebody
19:59
if a plot line is good enough for a book or not.
20:01
I'm like, okay, you're a fiction writer, but
20:02
you have a skill, right? So even with fiction,
20:05
it's possible. But we're going with, for general
20:09
purposes, nonfiction books and some expertise.
20:14
And we just named the piece that stands out.
20:16
You have to have some expertise to actually write
20:19
a book. I don't know how many people have. heard
20:22
from that they started to write a book and they
20:24
got 12 pages in and they ran out of content that's
20:28
they thought they had it and people who write
20:31
the book first of all it changes how they think
20:34
about What they're talking about. I mean, it
20:36
forms you in ways I created frameworks as I'm
20:40
going. How can I explain this? You create a framework
20:43
to explain it. How can people go through this?
20:45
You create a framework so they can go through
20:47
it. I'm sure that's true in your books, that
20:49
there is a framework that people follow in how
20:52
to network and how to move from the airwaves
20:54
to income. Those are ways you framework it. Right.
20:58
And so that's. That requires some thought. When
21:01
you have that level of thought, you're having
21:03
different conversations than if you just happen
21:06
to be skilled in some area. You're having a different
21:10
conversation on the front side. So when people
21:12
are interested in you and have a short conversation
21:14
with you, they go, okay, there's content here.
21:17
There's something there. We want frameworks.
21:21
And so that changes the conversations going into
21:25
the room. But the fact that you spent the time
21:28
to write the book changes the opportunities for
21:31
the book. I mean, on podcasts, when I can say
21:35
I've written seven books, people go, oh, maybe
21:38
I'd like to talk with you as opposed to I've
21:41
never written a book, but I would like to talk
21:42
to authors. That's a whole different frame. So
21:45
the authority still is there and how it shapes
21:49
your frameworking is there. And it gives you
21:52
more credibility. When you're speaking with somebody,
21:56
somebody who hasn't written a book or somebody
21:59
who's written seven, you know, I'm a novice.
22:02
I wrote two books and I thought that's great
22:05
until I spoke to you who wrote seven. I spoke
22:09
with John Maxwell, who wrote a hundred. Bob Berg
22:12
wrote, I think, 12 or 15 books. And it's like,
22:16
OK, I'm obviously just a beginner. And but. to
22:20
somebody who hasn't written anything, they look
22:23
at me like, oh, he wrote two books. And for me,
22:27
I look at you guys and I go, I didn't do anything.
22:32
So that's all right. Okay. And yet there are
22:36
people who have built completely full businesses
22:40
with one book. And people who have no business,
22:44
who have written multiple books, especially in
22:47
this age of how many books people can turn out
22:49
using AI and other ways. Just because they're
22:53
turning it out doesn't mean that those have authority.
22:56
So we're really talking about people who have
22:58
expertise that they are putting into the book.
23:00
They're creating the book in some way. And just
23:03
to say there are plenty of people who don't sit
23:06
down and write every word in their book. They
23:09
have a ghostwriter or they have an assistant
23:11
or there are lots of ways it can happen. Transcriptions.
23:14
So just to open that up, that there are plenty
23:17
of ways to create a book. It's still been created
23:20
because there's content to be put in there. Absolutely.
23:25
Okay. Many people try to do everything after
23:28
publishing, speaking, coaching, courses, consulting.
23:33
What does that approach usually, why does that
23:37
approach usually stall momentum instead of creating
23:41
it? That's overwhelming. I mean, first of all,
23:44
you can't stay focused on one thing. And so when
23:48
I have worked with authors, my thing is let's
23:50
start with one thing. Let's build one thing.
23:53
That was what happened to me. It was just an
23:56
accident. So the sales of the book is kind of
24:00
what I was metricing in the beginning. And then
24:02
people were like, you know, I need some coaching.
24:05
I'm like, okay, well, we'll add that in. Not
24:08
everybody could afford the coaching. OK, well,
24:10
let's find a different way of providing the help,
24:13
the feedback that they need. Not all the time
24:15
could I be the coach. OK, well, that would add
24:18
that add in. But each step was built as it went,
24:22
not everything all at once. I don't do I used
24:26
to do some speaking and some consulting. I don't
24:28
do that now, partly because it spread me too
24:30
thin. There's only so much a person can do. And
24:33
all of those require a different process to get
24:37
there. So I suggest that people pick a few, but
24:41
focus on the one at a time until they have that
24:45
down. Otherwise, it's overwhelmed. Nothing gets
24:48
done in any one area enough to get you there.
24:51
And then once you've got that down, it's easy
24:54
to add on. But sometimes you go, I don't want
24:58
to add on. I don't need to add on. I need to
25:00
continue this. You don't know how deep something
25:03
can go until you have stayed with it long enough
25:05
to find that out. Very good. Yep. From a networking
25:11
standpoint, how does focus make it easier for
25:15
others to refer, recommend, and remember you?
25:20
So I think one of the things that's very useful
25:22
is having the hooks in there. That's where authoring
25:28
a book is often powerful. I don't know how it
25:32
felt for you, but I would be sitting there writing
25:35
something going, oh. I haven't thought about
25:38
this frame, but let me put that in. And you go,
25:41
that's a hook that I can talk about. So when
25:44
you have that hook, it's easy to transfer information.
25:47
And so when you're in conversations, when you're
25:49
in networking, you can talk about, for instance,
25:51
I have a 3C process that people can use to save
25:55
their marriage. 3C process. They go, oh, what
25:57
is that? I can talk about that. I talk a good
26:00
bit in my trainings about the dangers of the
26:03
pause button marriage. People are curious about
26:07
what I mean by a pause button marriage. So I
26:10
can drop a hook in and let the people get curious
26:14
about it. And that is engaging for them to go,
26:17
oh, there's something else there. And first of
26:19
all, you're saying I have a framework that's
26:23
useful and I've tested it and I've done it enough
26:25
that I can name it. And that's important because
26:28
everybody uses a framework in their life. I mean,
26:31
we have systems. We just haven't named them and
26:33
clarified them. So you have that. You create
26:36
curiosity by naming that. And then you follow
26:40
up by saying how that can be transformational
26:42
for where the people are. Outstanding. Yep, absolutely.
26:48
I had about three questions, but I was listening
26:50
so intently to you that I forgot what the questions
26:55
were. But I'll move on to the next one. Hopefully
26:57
I'm going to remember them. What should an author...
27:01
stop saying at networking events if they book
27:04
if if they're booked to open doors instead of
27:08
creating confusion yeah one of the things i see
27:13
people do is they circle it's like they wrote
27:16
the book and then they drop back to their heels
27:18
and they they suddenly start downplaying what
27:22
they've done and so they go from a position of
27:25
i have this authority to Well, maybe I don't.
27:28
And start hedging on that. So I think that is
27:31
always dangerous just in life to be able to knock
27:35
yourself onto your heels, that you want to be
27:37
on your toes. If somebody else pushes back, then
27:39
of course you're going to have to speak into
27:42
that. But to start with that, so they'll hold
27:44
up their book that they wrote and then they start
27:46
going, well, it's not really a big deal. And
27:48
it hasn't really sold much. And suddenly you're
27:52
taking away your own authority. The power that
27:54
people get from writing a book is they wrote
27:59
the book. It doesn't matter how many books are
28:02
sold. Average number of books sold, about 200
28:05
copies. And I think that's even in flux now because
28:08
of all the mess that's coming out. But a few
28:12
years ago, the average was 200 copies. People
28:14
who could get above 200 copies were well exceeding
28:18
the average. Now let's just extrapolate a little
28:21
bit. a million copies, some book sells a million
28:25
copies, how many have to sell 5, 10, 15, 20 to
28:30
balance that out to 200, right? So just looking
28:33
at that, the chances of having a bestseller,
28:37
a true bestseller, not you got it pumped up on
28:41
Amazon in a subcategory for 30 minutes, but a
28:44
true bestseller. is not extreme, but that doesn't
28:48
matter. It's not the number of copies. It's the
28:51
process to get there. You did the process to
28:54
get there. You took the time to write the book.
28:56
You took the time to get it printed or published
28:59
or however you did that and multiple ways of
29:01
doing that. That's what you stand on. I wrote
29:05
the book on this. This is my knowledge. And to
29:09
stay with the knowledge point is where you survive.
29:13
That's where you get into the networking and
29:16
you wrote the book. It's only sold 20 copies.
29:19
I've seen this multiple times when people are
29:21
like, I wrote the book. I wish it would sell.
29:23
You wrote a book. You wrote a book. That's it.
29:26
I go to a Chamber of Commerce meeting every week.
29:31
And there's 40 or 50 businesses. And I always,
29:35
at the end of the meeting, put my book up there
29:39
as a giveaway. Because I've, I've gotten the
29:43
attention of everybody in there. And I'm always
29:47
the expert in the networking field. So it's like,
29:51
here I am the expert in the field, I wrote a
29:55
book, and here it is. And everybody buys for
29:59
the book. So at the end of each meeting, I do
30:03
that and they're almost waiting for it for me
30:06
to Say I'm going to give the book away. So now
30:09
I have I have two books. I have a podcasting
30:12
book and some people are more interested in one
30:15
than the other. But it doesn't really matter
30:17
because I'm the expert in both of them and I'm
30:20
giving that away. And I created that feeling,
30:23
that sensation that they got to have it. I need
30:27
that. Right. I need that. Yeah. How can a book
30:31
act as a filter attracting the right connections
30:35
while. Quietly repelling the wrong ones. So you
30:40
can see this on different levels. One is the
30:43
title itself. There are a number of titles out
30:46
that are far more provocative than I would be
30:48
in the way I speak. And those books are intended
30:52
to filter out people who are offended by that
30:55
and don't want to be a part of that community.
30:57
So that's a filter out. Filter in is the one
31:01
that goes, that speaks to me. One of my books
31:04
that I wrote early on was How to Save Your Marriage
31:06
in Three Simple Steps. There is not a lot left
31:09
to the imagination of what that is about. You're
31:11
not going to read that if you're not married
31:13
or if your marriage is great. You're going to
31:16
read it because you need to know how to save
31:19
a marriage and you need a direct approach. So
31:22
when we create a book, the title and the content
31:26
both serve as filters in and out. People will,
31:29
well, let me say, Before I say that, though,
31:32
there are plenty of people who think because
31:34
I've been in these author groups and they'll
31:36
say, who is this for? And they'll say, this book
31:39
is for everyone. If it's for everyone, it's for
31:42
no one. So it has to be targeted to who is your
31:47
ideal person? Who do you want to most listen
31:51
to this? And that automatically filters. The
31:53
design helps with that. The title helps with
31:56
that. The content helps with that. The first
31:58
thing people hear is. title of the book. That's
32:02
got to create some level of filter of them going,
32:05
I'm at least curious enough to go further, or
32:08
that's me, or I'm not interested in that at all.
32:12
And you've created the filter system right off
32:15
the bat. Yeah, absolutely. You have to pick a
32:18
lane, right? When I first got into speaking,
32:21
who can be better by what I have to say? I say,
32:28
everybody, everybody needs what I have. No, no,
32:31
no, no. Pick a lane. When I went through the
32:34
training to be a speaker, I learned the business
32:39
side. I'm a graduate of the speaker lab, and
32:42
they taught me the business side as well as speaking.
32:45
But he said no. pick a lane, you know, just pick
32:50
up, you know, two or three industries that really
32:53
need your business, your networking skills, and
32:56
go from there. And if you want to expand, go
32:58
on. But you have to pick a lane. And being an
33:01
author is the same thing. Yeah, we live in a
33:04
world where vanilla information is everywhere.
33:07
And we're overwhelmed with it. This was less
33:10
true. I remember when I first was into this kind
33:14
of this world, you could write a book on how
33:17
to have less stress and it would be popular.
33:20
Not anymore. There's plenty of stuff on the internet
33:23
and for free for stress, but how not to give
33:26
a, I'm not going to even fill it in. That's a
33:29
different level of how I'm going to deal with
33:31
my stress or, you know, how to deal with a narcissist.
33:35
Well, that is much more clear. If you don't have
33:36
a narcissist in your life, you're not going to
33:38
need that information, right? Those are very
33:40
defining books. It's not vanilla. They, you have
33:45
to have some flavor to it that they go, I want
33:48
that flavor. I'm not interested in the general
33:51
information that I can get from a general search,
33:54
especially in the day of AI. There, there's plenty
33:57
of vanilla. It just doesn't move the needle for
34:00
anyone. And that's, that's the mistake is people
34:02
believe in that information is all they have
34:04
to do. I, you know, I grew up with the knowledge
34:07
is power saying it is not. Knowledge is information.
34:11
First, applied knowledge is power. And second,
34:15
specific applied knowledge is the most powerful.
34:17
So how can we help people apply specific knowledge
34:21
in the area where you have the expertise? You
34:25
wrote the book on it. Yeah, you know, you have
34:28
to really wade through all of the information
34:31
that's available. You know, people go to chat
34:34
GPT for a lot of answers, but. Chat GPT gets
34:39
all the information off the internet and brings
34:42
it to you. Now, you know and I know that all
34:45
the information is incorrect. But it's not filtering
34:51
that out. So you have to filter out that information.
34:55
So you still have to put the work in, but the
34:58
information, a person can be on information overload.
35:02
And you just have to deal with that. You have
35:05
to be more specific. with what you're asking
35:08
and what you're getting and everything like that.
35:11
Okay. What relationships matter most after a
35:15
book is published and how should authors intentionally
35:18
build those circles? Yeah. So that kind of depends
35:25
on what you're doing with that, because that's
35:28
going to be your leverage point. If you're a
35:30
speaker to be able to say to a speaker bureau,
35:33
for instance, Hey, I've got a book on this and
35:34
here's what I like to cover. That's much more
35:36
powerful than, Oh, I just want to do speaking.
35:38
So you're, you're fostering that relationship
35:41
for me, who's dealing with not. I almost said
35:45
general public, but it's not the general public.
35:47
The public who's having a marriage crisis, when
35:49
I'm dealing with those people, they need some
35:52
clarity on how to move forward. So I'm building
35:55
a relationship with someone who's going, hmm,
35:57
I'm in trouble here. I'm not even dealing with
36:00
the people who are like, I just want to have
36:02
a happier marriage. I have some resources for
36:04
that, but most people find me because their marriage
36:07
is truly in trouble. So I speak to them, and
36:11
I'm building a relationship with them, understanding
36:13
where they're at. And so the more I can solidify
36:16
me as the answer, the more likely they are to
36:20
stay in my network, to stay in, to use the business
36:25
term, my funnel. and move through that as they
36:28
needed. So who are you close to? That depends
36:30
on what you're doing with your business. The
36:32
piece that I think is important is knowing what
36:36
your business is. And that's the process of building
36:38
it out that I think most people get lost in.
36:41
Yeah, that's fair. Can you share an example of
36:45
when narrowing the message around a book led
36:49
to better connections and a stronger revenue?
36:53
Yeah, so let me tell my story. When I was writing
36:56
the book, I was writing a general book on how
36:59
to have a better marriage. And so I'll tell you
37:02
about Bob. Bob called me late one night, and
37:06
it had been a long day, but this was back when
37:08
you didn't know to filter the phone so much,
37:11
1999. It was in 2000 because it had been out
37:14
a few months. So I answered the phone. And this
37:18
guy starts talking to me and I'm like, man, is
37:20
he going to tell me that I screwed up his relationship?
37:23
Or is he going to tell me that, you know, he
37:26
wants free coaching here at whatever it was,
37:29
nine o 'clock at night. My wife is kind of staring
37:30
at me. Well, Bob was telling me the story where
37:34
my book that was written for both people to work
37:37
on, he knew their marriage was in trouble. And
37:39
so he had gotten my material and he was planning
37:42
on presenting it to his wife that weekend. And
37:45
the day he bought it. At the end of the day,
37:47
he went home and she said, I'm done. This is
37:50
over. I am absolutely done. And so he said, I
37:54
was like, I'm going to get a refund from this
37:55
guy. And it was over the weekend. He's like,
37:58
I'm not going to do it right now. So I think
38:00
maybe I'll just look at it. So he started reading
38:01
it. And so the material that I had created to
38:05
help people have a happy marriage gave him what
38:09
he needed to restart a broken marriage. And the
38:14
more I started listening to Bob, the more I realized
38:18
that there was a world there that I needed to
38:21
focus on. Because there's a lot of information
38:23
from people that is about how to just have a
38:26
better marriage. And it mostly is not read because
38:29
people don't focus on that until they're in trouble.
38:32
And so it defined who I wanted to focus in on
38:35
more. I wanted to focus on Bob's. And so we redesigned
38:39
some things, added some extra pieces in, took
38:42
some pieces out that didn't matter for that setting.
38:45
And that's what led to Save the Marriage. He
38:47
gave me the kind of the vision of what that could
38:51
be about because I watched for what was different.
38:55
He was telling me a story that wasn't about how
38:58
it improved his marriage. He was telling me a
39:00
story about how it saved his marriage and that
39:02
difference. created a whole new thruway for what
39:06
my business became. Wow, that's great. That's
39:10
a great story. Okay, so let's bring this podcast
39:13
full circle. If an author listened today, wants
39:18
their book to create real business opportunities
39:20
in the next 90 days, what's one networking move
39:26
they should make immediately? Yeah. So now we're
39:31
at the, what is your business going to be? Right.
39:33
And so part of the one piece is going, where
39:37
do I want to start this process? What are the
39:39
one things? And this is where I feel like authors
39:42
get derailed. They're so back to the information.
39:45
There's so much coming at us and people telling
39:47
you how to be a six and seven figure author,
39:50
coach, all of these things. And it's like, open
39:54
up the fire hydrant and going, I think I'll get
39:55
a sip. It just, you can't, you know, so you're
39:58
overwhelmed with that. And when you're overwhelmed,
40:00
you tend to do nothing. And so we have these
40:04
two groups on either side where they don't know
40:06
what to do. They do nothing. They have too much
40:10
coming at them. They do nothing. And so part
40:12
of what I try to do is move into the process
40:14
of going, okay, let's start talking about that
40:17
something. What do you need to do? And the first
40:19
piece is actually thinking about what piece is
40:23
important to me. What is the starting point for
40:26
this? My process is actually looking at what
40:29
can you do one thing each week to build it, not
40:32
100 things a week, not 1 ,000 things a week that
40:35
you get from some programs, but what one thing
40:37
can you do to further that? It may be a networking
40:41
piece of figuring out who to talk to. It may
40:43
be stepping back and going, what is the framework
40:46
that I need to clarify? It may be, who do I need
40:49
to listen to? But that one piece builds up over
40:53
time. You've done the heavy lifting of the thinking.
40:57
Now we're doing the heavy lifting of the creating.
40:59
How do we build that out? That was great. I can
41:05
probably fill another two hours worth of questions
41:08
that I would have for you, but we don't have
41:10
that kind of time. If somebody would want to
41:14
get hold of you, whether it's to... for you to
41:17
help them author their next book, to begin a
41:20
book, to get coaching or anything from you, what's
41:24
the best way for them to contact you? Yeah, so
41:26
this is, it kind of made sense. And you're like,
41:28
oh gosh, I have the book. I want to build it
41:30
out. I've got this business or I am planning
41:32
my book, which is even a better time to be thinking
41:35
about that. Booktobusinessblueprint .com. So
41:38
booktobusinessblueprint, that's T -O. to go towards.
41:44
So it's a book to business blueprint .com is
41:47
the place to find me and resources. I've got
41:50
a podcast there, some articles, but the big thing
41:52
I have is a process to lead them through that
41:55
one step at a time that they can find there.
41:59
Okay. Well, okay. So let me just, this conversation
42:03
is your reminder that success doesn't come from
42:07
doing everything. It comes from doing the right
42:10
things consistently. A book is powerful when
42:15
it sharpens your message, attracts the right
42:17
relationships, and gives people a clear reason
42:20
to remember and refer you. When focus is missing,
42:25
even the best books get lost in the noise. If
42:29
today's episode changed how you're using your
42:31
book or how you're networking around it, Take
42:34
action this week. Refine your message. Tighten
42:38
your conversations. Let your book lead, not distract.
42:42
Share this episode with an author or entrepreneur
42:45
who needs clarity right now. Make sure you subscribe
42:48
to Networking Unleashed, building profitable
42:51
connections so you never miss conversations that
42:54
help you connect smarter and grow stronger. And
42:57
if you're ready to turn your message into...
42:59
a meaningful opportunity, visit foreman .com
43:03
to learn how I work with professionals, teams,
43:06
and organizations. So until next time, simplify
43:09
your message, focus your connections, and build
43:12
relationships that actually move the needle.
43:15
Lee, I want to thank you again for coming on
43:17
my podcast. You were wonderful. Michael, thanks
43:20
for having me. Well, hold on, folks. Don't go
43:27
anywhere. Let's hear from our sponsors. David
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44:19
A huge thank you to our guests for sharing such...
44:22
insights today. And of course, a big shout out
44:26
to you, our amazing listeners, for tuning in
44:29
and spending your time with us. If you're interested
44:32
in my digital courses, being coached or having
44:35
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44:38
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44:42
networking isn't about being perfect. It's about
44:45
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44:48
get out there and make some meaningful connections.
44:52
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44:55
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44:58
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45:00
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45:03
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45:08
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