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Graceful Detachment with Barb Schmidt · Deeply Well with Devi Brown

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Speaker 1: M from grandmothers who whispered in their baby girl in
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Speaker 1: two fathers on dimly lit street corners, instructing young soldiers
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Speaker 1: to always keep their eyes open. You be queen, you
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Speaker 1: were fired. You will pass through centuries on the hands
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Speaker 1: of your daughters. They called you wisdom. Proverbs on the
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Speaker 1: backs of diamond eyed school children who growing into hymnals
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Speaker 1: recited by amethyst holding urban philosophers who recited neighborhood commandments
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Speaker 1: out of the windows of restored Alchemedo chariots. To keep
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Speaker 1: the warmth of their blood. Be wise, be smart, being black,
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Speaker 1: Opal Brown courts, bloodstone and prayer. Be every form of
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Speaker 1: jim s King told, scribe, scribe, told son, son, told wife,
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Speaker 1: wife told her daughter, and daughter told the ant. This is.
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Speaker 1: And the ancestors told me that you would come to
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Speaker 1: give wisdom. Thousands. They said you would come Dropping Dropping Jim.
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Speaker 1: Welcome to Dropping Jim's. I'm Debbie Brown. This is my podcast.
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Speaker 1: Here's a place that is a soft place to land
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Speaker 1: as we explore higher consciousness and make it tangible and
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Speaker 1: applicable to our every day life using all the tools
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Speaker 1: that we get in real time. That is my goal,
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Speaker 1: that is my mission. Healing with joy, grace, and ease
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Speaker 1: today's show. I am really excited and grateful as always
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Speaker 1: to have such beautiful souls join us in this space
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Speaker 1: and share their wisdom. And today's show is going to
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Speaker 1: be so juicy. Uh. I'm so excited to have Barbe
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Speaker 1: Schmidt on the show today. Barbed Schmidt is a meditation
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Speaker 1: teacher and author, a mindfulness activist, and the co found
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Speaker 1: under of Peaceful Mind Peaceful Life. A practitioner of mindfulness
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Speaker 1: and meditation for over thirty five years, Barb is the
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Speaker 1: author of the internationally best selling book The Practice Simple
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Speaker 1: Tools for Managing Stress, Finding Inner Peace, and Uncovering Happiness.
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Speaker 1: In two thousand eleven, she founded the nonprofit Peaceful Mind,
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Speaker 1: Peaceful Life, with a mission to further inner peace and
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Speaker 1: bring mindfulness teachings to the global community across all social
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Speaker 1: media platforms. Peaceful Mind, Peaceful Life has over eight million followers,
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Speaker 1: inspiring people to love who they are and have the
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Speaker 1: courage to live the life of their dreams. Currently, Barbed
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Speaker 1: teaches regular mindfulness and meditations workshops at Boca Raton Regional
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Speaker 1: Hospital as part of the Peaceful Mind, Peaceful Life Wellness
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Speaker 1: series for nurses staff and the whole community. Barb co
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Speaker 1: founded the Health First Initiative at the Florida Atlantic University
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Speaker 1: Medical School, which provides medical students with tools for taking
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Speaker 1: care of their own mental and physical health. And Barbara's
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Speaker 1: passionate about mentoring the next generation of leaders. The Barbed
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Speaker 1: Schmidt Fellowship for Cultivating Community Involvement, Activism and Social Change
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Speaker 1: at Florida Atlantic University aims to provide high school student
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Speaker 1: leaders with a platform to develop the skills and knowledge
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Speaker 1: needed to initiate, execute, and sustain a social movement. She's
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Speaker 1: presented workshops for over a decade at Florida Atlantic University
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Speaker 1: as part of the Peace, Justice and Human Rights Initiative,
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Speaker 1: and Barbara has created and led programs teaching mindfulness at
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Speaker 1: Nova Southeastern University and a local childhood development centers, high schools, universities,
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Speaker 1: college athletic programs, and transitional programs for young adults with autism.
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Speaker 1: Barbe's deepest desire is that people love, accept and trust
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Speaker 1: themselves completely, knowing that this inter confidence and strength will
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Speaker 1: lead to a world of peace and love. So grateful
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Speaker 1: to have you here. Welcome to the show, Barb, Thank
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Speaker 1: you Brown So I'm so honored so honored to be
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Speaker 1: here with you. I can't even express it enough. There
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Speaker 1: are there are no words. I just adore you and
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Speaker 1: I love You're dropping gems all over social media, all
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Speaker 1: over the country, all over the world. Um, the things
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Speaker 1: that you're doing are not only inspirational for me, but
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Speaker 1: I love what you're doing and helping people around the globe.
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Speaker 1: So I'm really honored. That means so much. Bar that
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Speaker 1: means so much. I you are everything I like. Every
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Speaker 1: time I see you on my Instagram or we like exchange,
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Speaker 1: I cannot stop myself from being filled with a smile.
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Speaker 1: You just have one of the most breathtaking spirits I've
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Speaker 1: ever encountered. You know, It's just like it feels so
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Speaker 1: rare to meet angels, but to be in your presence
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Speaker 1: even virtually, like it fills the room with such an
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Speaker 1: angelic love and depth. And the way that you share
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Speaker 1: your work in the world, it's just so gorgeous and
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Speaker 1: it's so gentle and it's so full, like there's so
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Speaker 1: much depth of spiritual teaching while also making it feel
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Speaker 1: gentle some of the more scary things. And so I
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Speaker 1: just admire you so much, and I'm so grateful to
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Speaker 1: have you here when you get started. You guys look good.
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Speaker 1: They're going to be listening to this right for a
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Speaker 1: pick tree. Just to be just to be in your
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Speaker 1: presence and interviewed by you is such a gift and
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Speaker 1: a blessing to me today. I couldn't wait all day
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Speaker 1: for this. I did nothing else today but get ready
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Speaker 1: for you and just be so you know all the things,
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Speaker 1: and you know I love our story. Barbed like so
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Speaker 1: Barbe and I everyone we met. Actually this is now
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Speaker 1: probably a year and a half ago, maybe a little more.
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Speaker 1: At the top of the pandemic, there was this really
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Speaker 1: incredible um movement put together by Lovey and by Glennon Doyle,
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Speaker 1: and it was called Share the Mic Now, and it
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Speaker 1: was really in response to the social injustice that globally
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Speaker 1: was being seen that many of us knew existed and experience,
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Speaker 1: but was having this really larger reach. And we got
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Speaker 1: paired and it was really like women of color got
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Speaker 1: paired with this sounds bizartist that may be fun. Women
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Speaker 1: of color got paired with white women and we got
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Speaker 1: on this giant, enormous zoom call that it was a
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Speaker 1: hundred of us in the inaugural class, and I got
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Speaker 1: paired with you, and it was really incredible. I got
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Speaker 1: paired with you, with your daughter Michelle, with Peaceful Mind,
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Speaker 1: Peaceful Life, which is your foundation, and also your wildly
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Speaker 1: popular Instagram page, and you and I I'll never forget
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Speaker 1: you know, we all got on this huge call. It
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Speaker 1: was well over a hundred people. We were sharing for
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Speaker 1: a long time, and really the whole point of this
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Speaker 1: at this time was about getting some of the deeper
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Speaker 1: understanding of what was happening in the world out into
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Speaker 1: larger channels people that had like yourself, that have well
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Speaker 1: over a million followers, and connecting other perspectives and other
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Speaker 1: ways of looking at scenarios or looking at industries, and
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Speaker 1: so it was really so powerfully felt for so many
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Speaker 1: of us. So the two of us were put together
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Speaker 1: and we ended up immediately getting on our own call
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Speaker 1: on the side, and we fell in love. That's our
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Speaker 1: love story, um, and we ended up just having I'll
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Speaker 1: never forget. I remember getting on that call with you
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Speaker 1: and it was a zoom. It was me, it was you,
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Speaker 1: and it was Michelle, and we just it just instantly
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Speaker 1: felt like we knew each other for eternities, just so
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Speaker 1: long and when I had a chance to to really
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Speaker 1: speak to you and really get to know your content
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Speaker 1: and your teaching on your platform. I was just blown away.
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Speaker 1: Just spoke to my soul in such a deep way.
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Speaker 1: And I love the way that you share, especially some
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Speaker 1: of the some of the more shadowy aspects of the work.
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Speaker 1: I've never seen someone rap shadow in such light before,
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Speaker 1: and I think that's the thing that I love most
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Speaker 1: about connecting to the work that you do in the world.
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Speaker 1: You know, you get into some of the trickier things
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Speaker 1: to talk about, you know, and I see even on
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Speaker 1: your page like some and we'll get into this later
8:29
Speaker 1: because I have a lot of questions, but you know,
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Speaker 1: one of the things that that you and Michelle speak
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Speaker 1: about even in the videos that you guys do together,
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Speaker 1: are you know, things like some personality disorders, the real
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Speaker 1: real trauma associated with being in narcissistic partnerships or relationships, um,
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Speaker 1: some different personality disorders and and ways of survival, you know,
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Speaker 1: And I think that that doesn't always get spoken to
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Speaker 1: enough in this space. So so I'm happy to be
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Speaker 1: here with you. And you know, you you're an o G.
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Speaker 1: You're in this space. You have been a meditation and
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Speaker 1: a spiritual teacher for over thirty five years and somewhere.
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Speaker 1: I'd love to start with you because I'm always so
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Speaker 1: so an on admiration of those that found this work.
9:20
Speaker 1: When no one was talking about this work on a
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Speaker 1: mainstream level. Now we're having these conversations and it's like, yes,
9:27
Speaker 1: mental health, mindfulness, meditation, and it's just like oh yeah, girls,
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Speaker 1: self care, you know, like we're saying it like it's
9:32
Speaker 1: so easy. But you know, there there are times in
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Speaker 1: history where if you said you meditated, you might be
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Speaker 1: an outcast in your town or in your area, in
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Speaker 1: your friend group, you know. And so I just i'd
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Speaker 1: love to start with thirty five plus years ago, how
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Speaker 1: did you find the courage to find this work and
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Speaker 1: share it? You know, I think it's it's so interesting
9:55
Speaker 1: to hear you say that, because it I think that's
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Speaker 1: what gave me the goose bons, because it's so true.
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Speaker 1: I was an outcast. I I um, I had a
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Speaker 1: very difficult life growing up to alcoholic parents and trauma
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Speaker 1: and abuse and all of the all the things. So
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Speaker 1: I really need to go deep into that, but just
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Speaker 1: know that it was a really really really hard childhood.
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Speaker 1: No money, none of that. But I always knew inside
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Speaker 1: of me, I had a deep spiritual connection to God.
10:19
Speaker 1: I was raised Catholic, and so I would teach at
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Speaker 1: the Sunday school and stuff. So I always had always
10:24
Speaker 1: pray and say, this can't be my life. It's got
10:26
Speaker 1: to be better than this. Um And so what I
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Speaker 1: learned at an early age, at thirteen, I started working
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Speaker 1: at McDonald's you could do that back then in the seventies,
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Speaker 1: and I thrived that loved me. I had so much attention,
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Speaker 1: and I just really what I learned from that was
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Speaker 1: the more I thrived on the outside world, the better
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Speaker 1: people like me. So I really had a shift. And
10:48
Speaker 1: even before that a little bit, I think, but before
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Speaker 1: but at thirteen, Wow, it matters what I'm doing on
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Speaker 1: the outside world. It matters how I look. All that matters.
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Speaker 1: And what happened over the years was that the came
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Speaker 1: my life, and so I didn't care what was inside
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Speaker 1: of me. I didn't care how I felt. I didn't
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Speaker 1: care who I you know, it didn't matter how I
11:07
Speaker 1: how I felt, or even you know, what what I
11:11
Speaker 1: needed to do on the inside. So God kind of
11:14
Speaker 1: went away, and he kind of went away a little
11:16
Speaker 1: bit as well, or she kind of went away when
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Speaker 1: when I had suffered as sexual abuse with with a
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Speaker 1: family member, so it kind of felt like, oh, he
11:24
Speaker 1: doesn't like me anyway, so let me just do what
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Speaker 1: I know that I can do. And so, you know,
11:30
Speaker 1: fast forward to age twenty three, I owned my own
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Speaker 1: McDonald's restaurants, you know, many, my god, so I was
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Speaker 1: one of the first women. But along the way in
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Speaker 1: that journey, I developed an eating disorder of limia. You know,
11:43
Speaker 1: when you are denying that inside little girl or or
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Speaker 1: big girl or whoever that girl is, that all of
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Speaker 1: her feelings and you're constantly stuffing on. It was food
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Speaker 1: that that helped me do that. And it also was
11:55
Speaker 1: a supervisor that came in one day and he said,
11:58
Speaker 1: brought me in a big award and check and all
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Speaker 1: the things, because I was really successful. You said, you
12:03
Speaker 1: know what, you were doing, such a fabulous job. And
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Speaker 1: since I've met you, which was probably maybe a year
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Speaker 1: before you put on a lot of weights, you must
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Speaker 1: like this job too. And I'm like, I mean even
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Speaker 1: saying that today to you, and I remember, all I
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Speaker 1: heard was you are fat, you are that. Okay, this
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Speaker 1: is not okay. Because everything was externally driven so it
12:27
Speaker 1: propelled me into this. Oh well, this is why you're
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Speaker 1: not happy, Barbara, this is why you don't have this
12:32
Speaker 1: or that or whatever. Um, so you're right. The great
12:37
Speaker 1: fortune that I had in Nive was I couldn't go
12:40
Speaker 1: to work one day and opened the newspaper here in
12:43
Speaker 1: Port Lauderdale, and and there was an advertisement for eating
12:48
Speaker 1: disorder treatment center. They had alcoholism and drug addiction as well,
12:51
Speaker 1: but the first of its kind um in South Florida.
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Speaker 1: And it was the one year anniversary of Karen Carpenter's death,
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Speaker 1: who was one of my favorites as a child, I
12:59
Speaker 1: mean loved her, and she died of bollini and antirexy.
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Speaker 1: But no one had heard of it. I didn't connect
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Speaker 1: the dots. What is that? So I was really lucky
13:08
Speaker 1: in this treatment center. I just I thank God every
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Speaker 1: day in my meditation, in my prayers that I was
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Speaker 1: led to this center. They taught mindfulness, they taught meditation,
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Speaker 1: they taught yoga, I mean everything else. They taught us food,
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Speaker 1: and they went through lots of therapy and group therapy.
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Speaker 1: But but it was woven all that therapy and all
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Speaker 1: the things they probably do today had mindfulness and walking
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Speaker 1: and exercising and yoga and meditation and sitting with silent
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Speaker 1: eating and mindful eating, mindful eating. I even have tapes
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Speaker 1: from back then because that tastes you know. So I'm
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Speaker 1: very grateful and very lucky. But it was hard six
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Speaker 1: weeks in treatment, and when I came out, I was
13:54
Speaker 1: really blessed because I knew that if I didn't do something,
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Speaker 1: but if I didn't find a practice sir, if I
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Speaker 1: didn't find a teacher, if I didn't keep this meditation
14:03
Speaker 1: and mindfulness, this whole tool kit of things that I
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Speaker 1: learned in treatment, I had this. I knew that I
14:08
Speaker 1: would die because I met so many people in treatment
14:11
Speaker 1: that we're in. There's my age today. I'm sixty four
14:14
Speaker 1: years old. Today. I met so many people in there
14:16
Speaker 1: suffer from bolima for twenty thirty forty years, all the
14:20
Speaker 1: illnesses and things, and I wow, I'm twenty eight. This
14:25
Speaker 1: is amazing. Now, I need to be serious. And it's
14:29
Speaker 1: been thirty seven years. Incredible of instant studying and teaching
14:35
Speaker 1: and all the things I think a lot of people
14:37
Speaker 1: maybe do today, And it was just not mainstream back then.
14:40
Speaker 1: It was not easy finding the difference. So I would
14:43
Speaker 1: read a book, and that would lead me to the
14:46
Speaker 1: next book or the next teacher, or it was just
14:48
Speaker 1: constantly absorbing, and I was so thirsty and hungry for
14:51
Speaker 1: it that I never stopped exploring. Without internet, without all
14:55
Speaker 1: the things that we have today, I was always doing
14:57
Speaker 1: it on my own. And people thought it was crazy.
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Speaker 1: And I'll tell you, and this is what makes me
15:02
Speaker 1: sad today. No, I hope it's not true. I do
15:05
Speaker 1: talk to a lot of kids. When I told I
15:08
Speaker 1: got our treatment, excited like I was on top of
15:10
Speaker 1: the world. I told everyone I knew, Yeah, I was
15:14
Speaker 1: in treatment for boliemia and this and that and all
15:17
Speaker 1: the stuff, and I was so excited all I learned.
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Speaker 1: All they heard was, oh my gosh, beliemia. So does
15:23
Speaker 1: that mean we shouldn't eat with you because it's not
15:26
Speaker 1: going to be okay. And then they thought it was weird,
15:30
Speaker 1: you know, meditation and all of that. So you're right.
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Speaker 1: I did lose quite a few relationships and friendships and
15:37
Speaker 1: just even acquaintances of people that I thought it was
15:41
Speaker 1: a little bit weird because I was a little more
15:42
Speaker 1: mindful as a little slowed down. I owned McDonald's restaurant.
15:45
Speaker 1: But now I'm trying to slow my mind down so
15:47
Speaker 1: I'm not a crazy person. It was a challenge. Wow,
15:51
Speaker 1: when I think of that moment when we complete something
15:54
Speaker 1: or when we get this new understanding, and it's almost
15:57
Speaker 1: like this these part you know, and I Sometimes when
16:00
Speaker 1: we're trying to hold onto what was, that's when it
16:04
Speaker 1: feels so challenging and difficult. But if we're just present
16:07
Speaker 1: and we're in allowance, that's like, yeah, a lot of
16:10
Speaker 1: people may have left my life. We're not on bad terms,
16:14
Speaker 1: you know. But I needed to make room. I evolved
16:18
Speaker 1: into something else entirely. That's the way that I've experienced it,
16:21
Speaker 1: where it's like you have to allow yourself the full evolution.
16:27
Speaker 1: I evolved into something else entirely, and I needed to
16:30
Speaker 1: make space for the relationships, the acquaintance ships, the people
16:35
Speaker 1: and experiences that now feed into what that new life is.
16:40
Speaker 1: And so I love that you mentioned that because I
16:42
Speaker 1: think that is the piece that feels scariest for people.
16:45
Speaker 1: Sometimes it's not even like doing the work on yourself.
16:48
Speaker 1: It's this idea of the perceived losses that will come
16:51
Speaker 1: up when we decide to take action in our lives,
16:54
Speaker 1: or we decide to grow and change. We're so attached
16:59
Speaker 1: to familiar arity. And me too, you know, I've been
17:02
Speaker 1: going through some things in the past couple of years,
17:04
Speaker 1: and big time things in the past six months. And
17:07
Speaker 1: what I've realized, that's what meditation, mindfulness is why it's
17:10
Speaker 1: so precious. I realized because I'm so aware. I realized,
17:14
Speaker 1: you're just you're attached to the familiar, the familiarity of
17:18
Speaker 1: all of the people are the things are the you know,
17:20
Speaker 1: those those are um things that you can't hold on to,
17:25
Speaker 1: especially when the time is right to let them go
17:27
Speaker 1: or when the person is right to let it go.
17:29
Speaker 1: I had a dear, dear friend and she used to
17:31
Speaker 1: say to me, and no, burn, you know, not everyone's
17:33
Speaker 1: gonna be here to the long end. Because I'm always thinking,
17:35
Speaker 1: you know, I got a good friend, they got to
17:37
Speaker 1: be here forever. I want to be there forever for
17:38
Speaker 1: them or whatever the story is that we write. And
17:41
Speaker 1: she would always say, you know, most of these people
17:43
Speaker 1: are going to come and go in your life. That's
17:44
Speaker 1: the way it is. And so we hope. I I
17:47
Speaker 1: know that I hold on to the things that are
17:49
Speaker 1: familiar and the things that were and I think just
17:52
Speaker 1: being aware of that for me has opened so many
17:55
Speaker 1: doors to the possibilities of how do I move forward?
17:58
Speaker 1: How do you make that word? And I think that's
18:01
Speaker 1: key and acknowledging how you feel it's okay to say
18:04
Speaker 1: this is hard, I'm scared. Um, these people are familiar
18:08
Speaker 1: to me, or this one particular person I've shared you know,
18:11
Speaker 1: thirty some years with and but it's okay. But it's
18:15
Speaker 1: okay to be sad, like you can have the two.
18:17
Speaker 1: We live in that dual society, so it's it's sad
18:20
Speaker 1: but happy at the same time. And I think if
18:21
Speaker 1: we can allow ourselves to be in that place thinking,
18:24
Speaker 1: knowing that it's okay and feeling all the feelings of
18:27
Speaker 1: excitement but also you know, fear or sadness or uncomfortable,
18:34
Speaker 1: I think that we're better off just being exactly who
18:36
Speaker 1: we are in the moment and acknowledge what's happening for
18:39
Speaker 1: us in the moment and allowing it to pass. Yeah,
18:43
Speaker 1: that's so powerful. And you know what I think of
18:47
Speaker 1: that as it applies to my own life, It's like
18:51
Speaker 1: I have been loving, especially in the last couple of years,
18:55
Speaker 1: the real deep connection to being able to be in
18:58
Speaker 1: the present moment and not think in terms of forevers,
19:03
Speaker 1: because I absolutely with somebody that was like, well, if
19:06
Speaker 1: we became friends, then it has to be forever. If
19:10
Speaker 1: we're together, then has to be forever. If I have
19:12
Speaker 1: this or that happening, it has to be forever. And
19:15
Speaker 1: then you know, obviously you'll drive yourself crazy because it's
19:18
Speaker 1: this false idea that we control anything and we don't,
19:23
Speaker 1: you know, and we can't even fathom what forever is
19:25
Speaker 1: or means. And you know, for anyone listening that also
19:29
Speaker 1: maybe doing some work around that. The thing that helped
19:32
Speaker 1: me was just always reframing it as saying, that is
19:36
Speaker 1: what society says, that is not actually how it's meant
19:39
Speaker 1: to be felt or experienced as human beings. But since
19:42
Speaker 1: we were children, happily ever after and happily you know,
19:46
Speaker 1: all in forever and everything was put into that context,
19:50
Speaker 1: and so you think that a moment has to stretch
19:52
Speaker 1: out instead of letting things pass in and out as
19:55
Speaker 1: they're meant to, as they're supposed to. So that has
19:58
Speaker 1: been something I've really been joining in my work, is
20:01
Speaker 1: getting to that place of detachment and just saying I'm
20:05
Speaker 1: I'm on, I'm onna ride, I'm on a divine journey
20:08
Speaker 1: that I'm helping to design and things will come and
20:11
Speaker 1: things will go, but it will always be right on
20:14
Speaker 1: time for me. Yeah, And you know it's so beautiful, daddy.
20:18
Speaker 1: And one of those things that Rochelle, my daughter Michelle,
20:20
Speaker 1: she talks about this a lot and her blogs and
20:22
Speaker 1: in her teachings, and it really struck me, I don't know,
20:26
Speaker 1: five six, seven years ago, because I learned this in treatment,
20:29
Speaker 1: that I can do anything for today that I couldn't
20:33
Speaker 1: necessarily fathom doing for a lifetime. I use that as
20:37
Speaker 1: one of my mottos forever. But then she always looks
20:41
Speaker 1: at this idea of how do we how can we
20:43
Speaker 1: start to reframe or redirect the thoughts or redirect that
20:46
Speaker 1: what society is teaching us. And so when I think
20:50
Speaker 1: about friendship especially, or when you think about relationships especially,
20:54
Speaker 1: it's like, I can I'm in this relationship for today,
20:58
Speaker 1: and whatever happens for today is enough. I don't have
21:02
Speaker 1: to think about, oh my gosh, this will be a
21:04
Speaker 1: lifetime and let my mind take me down that path
21:07
Speaker 1: of you know, happily ever after, I can be really
21:09
Speaker 1: happy in this moment with the person today and reframe
21:12
Speaker 1: those thoughts that there's something wrong with me if the
21:15
Speaker 1: relationship doesn't last, or I can't set a boundary because
21:18
Speaker 1: I don't want them to leave me, or you know
21:20
Speaker 1: I'm not good enough because you know, because they're not
21:23
Speaker 1: calling me anymore, or whatever it is. If you're being
21:26
Speaker 1: left or you're being dumped, or if you're the one
21:29
Speaker 1: that's decided to move on, if you can try to
21:31
Speaker 1: reframe it as there's not necessarily anything wrong with you.
21:35
Speaker 1: It's maybe just the time. It's like this is the
21:38
Speaker 1: place for you to start growing more, or because we can't.
21:41
Speaker 1: I remember Oprah Winfrey when I went on one of
21:43
Speaker 1: her I think it was right before the pandemic, when
21:45
Speaker 1: I went on I think the Love your Life to
21:48
Speaker 1: her when she got up on stage and she said,
21:50
Speaker 1: you can have everything in your life that you desire
21:53
Speaker 1: and want, you just can't have it all. At the
21:55
Speaker 1: same time, I remember I lave, I were laughed at
21:59
Speaker 1: the guy love, I can't have it all the same time,
22:04
Speaker 1: of course we and then it makes so much sense,
22:06
Speaker 1: and I think I've laughed at days since and I
22:09
Speaker 1: need to just be gentle with yourselves and like it
22:11
Speaker 1: doesn't it's so hard. I also when when Glenn and
22:15
Speaker 1: Doyle's been one of my great friends and teachers as well,
22:18
Speaker 1: and she says we can do hard things. That is
22:21
Speaker 1: so genius. But I just want to say, we can
22:23
Speaker 1: do hard things, like I've said up been going through
22:25
Speaker 1: this now for a couple of years for yours. We
22:27
Speaker 1: can do hard things, but it might take a few years.
22:30
Speaker 1: It doesn't mean I can do hard Okay, I'm done.
22:34
Speaker 1: I did it. Oh my gosh, Oh there's something wrong
22:36
Speaker 1: with me, because here I am three years later, so
22:39
Speaker 1: having some of those same thoughts. Yeah, you know, it doesn't.
22:44
Speaker 1: This living the life that we're teaching and the way
22:48
Speaker 1: we want to live our lives. What we've chosen. It's
22:50
Speaker 1: not an overnight success. It is really a work on progress,
22:54
Speaker 1: and it's for the rest of your life. And I
22:56
Speaker 1: think you said beautifully and enjoying the journey along the way.
23:00
Speaker 1: What are the little joys and the things that we
23:02
Speaker 1: can see and don't we can do hard things. Means
23:05
Speaker 1: that's your model. And it takes the rest of my
23:07
Speaker 1: life to do maybe one hard thing that I'm having
23:09
Speaker 1: difficulty with. If I can do it after forty years
23:13
Speaker 1: or whatever it is, that's that's phenomenal. That's a success.
23:26
Speaker 1: I'm tell me, how did you guys end up launching
23:29
Speaker 1: Peaceful Mind, Peaceful Life. So I've been teaching this, as
23:34
Speaker 1: you said, for decades, and especially at the local university here,
23:38
Speaker 1: flot Land University. And every time I would teach a
23:41
Speaker 1: workshop or have to give a lecture or class on
23:44
Speaker 1: something like boundaries or self care or meditation all those things,
23:48
Speaker 1: everyone would come up to me and want to talk
23:50
Speaker 1: to me personally and did you have a paper? Do
23:52
Speaker 1: you have something that um, you know that we can
23:55
Speaker 1: take home? And so in two thousand fourteen, I decided,
23:58
Speaker 1: you know, after that it was around maybe two thousand
24:01
Speaker 1: five or six people could say write a book, write
24:03
Speaker 1: a book, or do a workbook or do something. I mean,
24:06
Speaker 1: we really didn't have it. We didn't have you know,
24:09
Speaker 1: easy courses and things like that. So I launched my
24:12
Speaker 1: well dial up and and even stuff. At the time,
24:16
Speaker 1: I feel like I live in the dinosaur days now.
24:18
Speaker 1: I know how my grandparents fells so but it so
24:24
Speaker 1: I launched my book in two thousand fourteen and it did,
24:27
Speaker 1: you know, really well, and it was so easy then
24:30
Speaker 1: to teach even more, and it was easier to teach
24:32
Speaker 1: with that, and as I started doing that a little
24:35
Speaker 1: bit um for about a year. I realized the work
24:39
Speaker 1: that I came here to do was to help change
24:42
Speaker 1: the world, one person at a time Mohamma Gandhi's you
24:46
Speaker 1: can be the change that you want to be, just
24:48
Speaker 1: one person at a time, trying to help them, um,
24:52
Speaker 1: you know, relieve their suffering, understand their worth, understand how
24:56
Speaker 1: incredible and amazing they are as just being a human being,
24:59
Speaker 1: just that whole idea of living your greatest life and not.
25:03
Speaker 1: I didn't want people to feel the way that I
25:05
Speaker 1: felt for the first thirty year thirty some years of
25:08
Speaker 1: my life, and I thought, I just I want to
25:11
Speaker 1: help people. I thought, I can't believe. I can't believe
25:14
Speaker 1: I'm where I am today. I would think to myself
25:17
Speaker 1: back then that I even wrote a book that I did,
25:19
Speaker 1: that if I can be here, they could be here.
25:21
Speaker 1: And so I had a dream. I was I'm so
25:25
Speaker 1: steeped in my practice and my readings, and I spent
25:28
Speaker 1: like ten years studying all the different religions. So I
25:31
Speaker 1: was studying Buddhism at the time, and I had a
25:34
Speaker 1: dream that I was between the Dalai Lama and Chairman
25:41
Speaker 1: Mao and they were. They were discussing how to have peace,
25:49
Speaker 1: like to batten and all the things. And so I'm
25:51
Speaker 1: in the middle of them trying to broker that deal.
25:54
Speaker 1: Oh my god, trying to broker the deal between um,
25:59
Speaker 1: you know, Sherman Mau and the dialama. And I remember
26:02
Speaker 1: in the middle of it looking at the dial lama
26:05
Speaker 1: something and I can't want to look at Herman mow um.
26:08
Speaker 1: I remember saying, I can't do this, are you crazy?
26:12
Speaker 1: What am I doing here? And He's looked at me
26:14
Speaker 1: and he said, you can do this and you have
26:17
Speaker 1: to do this, and so I goosepop. So I woke
26:21
Speaker 1: up and I thought what does that mean? And I
26:23
Speaker 1: couldn't get rid of it. And so the work that
26:26
Speaker 1: I was doing at the university we titled it like
26:29
Speaker 1: before any of this, peaceful Mind, Peaceful World, because in
26:33
Speaker 1: my my view of me is that I am a
26:36
Speaker 1: mind expert. I have studied my mind for thirty seven years.
26:41
Speaker 1: I I know when I'm in a rabbit hole and
26:45
Speaker 1: I'll say to myself, just stay there, let's feel good
26:48
Speaker 1: for a little whit, you know, because we do that.
26:50
Speaker 1: We don't always want to be fixing ourselves or being better.
26:53
Speaker 1: We want to just suffer for a little bit. It's
26:55
Speaker 1: the part of being human, and I think that's what
26:57
Speaker 1: makes us so special. Um So, I know I'm a
27:01
Speaker 1: mind experts. I thought it was always about and peaceful
27:03
Speaker 1: for me doesn't mean sitting in a cave or being
27:06
Speaker 1: a monk. It means um power, empowered, loving yourself, accepting yourself,
27:12
Speaker 1: trusting yourself, knowing that I may mess up a million times,
27:16
Speaker 1: but the one million and one time I'm going to
27:18
Speaker 1: get it because I have everything that I need inside
27:21
Speaker 1: of me. So in my mind, I thought peaceful Mind.
27:24
Speaker 1: That that mind that's not confused, that's not chaotic, that's
27:28
Speaker 1: not telling me. And then we did Peaceful World because
27:31
Speaker 1: I believe that if I can make my mind an
27:35
Speaker 1: ally and my best friend, then I can help someone
27:38
Speaker 1: else do that too. I'm such a huge proponent of experience.
27:41
Speaker 1: I'll share my experience with you. I don't necessarily want
27:44
Speaker 1: to tell you what to do. I want to show
27:45
Speaker 1: you what happened for me. I'm big on experience. Then,
27:48
Speaker 1: when I wrote the book, and then when I started
27:50
Speaker 1: a nonprofit, Michelle and I did but we can't use
27:53
Speaker 1: peace of mind, Peaceful World. That's the work we do there.
27:55
Speaker 1: And I think it was Michelle or someone in in
27:58
Speaker 1: our sphere said, well, what about just a life. It
28:01
Speaker 1: would be nice to have a peaceful life. I love.
28:06
Speaker 1: Maybe the world will get along, but I like my
28:09
Speaker 1: life so and I had to have to make it
28:13
Speaker 1: a nonprofit because that's me. I want to be able
28:15
Speaker 1: to I want all of these things to be affordable, accessible.
28:19
Speaker 1: That's I love social media so much and all the
28:22
Speaker 1: things that this century and these things that we're doing,
28:25
Speaker 1: I wanted to be. I wanted to be accessible and
28:27
Speaker 1: affordable for all people, every person of race, creed, color,
28:30
Speaker 1: all the things should be able to access. Health care,
28:34
Speaker 1: mental health care, everything, everything should be able to by anyone,
28:39
Speaker 1: regardless of how much money you have or the color
28:42
Speaker 1: of your skin. And I am a product of the sixties,
28:45
Speaker 1: of the you know, the racial justice movement, the women's movement,
28:48
Speaker 1: all the movements. I thought, oh, that's why you were
28:52
Speaker 1: a kid back in the sixties, because now you're you
28:55
Speaker 1: are sixty something, and now you can you're actually still
28:59
Speaker 1: living in this same nightmare that you know that's happening actually,
29:03
Speaker 1: and now you have all of the tools and all
29:06
Speaker 1: of the power and all of the things to effect change,
29:09
Speaker 1: and one of my greatest ways of doing that is
29:11
Speaker 1: making all the successful, helping people where ever weekend. And
29:14
Speaker 1: Michelle is the same, she's so passionate the same. It's
29:18
Speaker 1: it's not just for it to be just for a
29:22
Speaker 1: certain profit of people, you know, And speaking about the sixties,
29:29
Speaker 1: it's so interesting to me. So I study humanity like
29:31
Speaker 1: that is one of my favorite things to get deep
29:34
Speaker 1: and study about. And I love I love studying specifically
29:39
Speaker 1: paradigm shifts and consciousness and as it has evolved in
29:43
Speaker 1: different centuries and in different time periods, because we always
29:46
Speaker 1: noticed those big births that drove humanity forward by leaps
29:50
Speaker 1: and bounds, like there could have been hundreds of years
29:53
Speaker 1: where things were done exactly the same and then a
29:56
Speaker 1: ten year time span everything changes um and we have
30:00
Speaker 1: things like you know, steal in the Industrial Revolution, and
30:03
Speaker 1: you know technology and science, and so it just it
30:07
Speaker 1: fascinates me the way that that happens. And so I
30:10
Speaker 1: really study it because I love looking at patterns about
30:14
Speaker 1: energy and about our ascension and awakening of the human
30:19
Speaker 1: And so to hear you talk about the sixties, you
30:22
Speaker 1: brought up such a powerful point and there were there
30:26
Speaker 1: were so many things that were ripe in a few
30:28
Speaker 1: decades that kind of blended together, from the women's movement
30:33
Speaker 1: to racial justice and civil rights, to consciousness, you know,
30:37
Speaker 1: even even the reclamation of our bodies in certain extents
30:42
Speaker 1: with the free love movement and changing you know, the
30:44
Speaker 1: ways that we experience sexuality. And they all kind of
30:47
Speaker 1: converged at once. And even though we still have a
30:51
Speaker 1: long way to go, there was so much that shifted
30:55
Speaker 1: and then it felt like there was a stopping point.
30:57
Speaker 1: And maybe that's the integration point. This how I'm looking
31:00
Speaker 1: at it from like a study mind, right, I'm like,
31:02
Speaker 1: maybe we need four decades to integrate and then we
31:05
Speaker 1: do it again. And and so it feels that we
31:08
Speaker 1: are very much in that, but more powerfully right now. Um.
31:12
Speaker 1: And I'm just curious as someone who one got the
31:16
Speaker 1: call in such a rare way when no one else
31:20
Speaker 1: was doing that, you know, like I believe, especially people
31:23
Speaker 1: like yourself, you know, where you were planted there, you
31:26
Speaker 1: had to exist, you had to exist because how else
31:30
Speaker 1: would have people in your orbit, in your area gotten
31:33
Speaker 1: this work. They wouldn't have, you know, And so there's
31:36
Speaker 1: so much so I guess I'm saying a few things
31:39
Speaker 1: for those listening. One, if there is a calling on
31:42
Speaker 1: your heart, you must listen to it, no matter how
31:46
Speaker 1: small it is, no matter how even if you can't
31:49
Speaker 1: see the full path or understand, you have to. You
31:52
Speaker 1: have to because wherever you are planted, you are needed. Um.
31:56
Speaker 1: But I would just love from your perspective, m what
32:01
Speaker 1: do you think is happening right now in comparison to
32:04
Speaker 1: when you have seen these big conscious shifting moments happened before?
32:10
Speaker 1: And what do you think maybe we're doing better or
32:12
Speaker 1: need to do better in comparison. Such a great question, Debbie,
32:18
Speaker 1: And I think what what you just said about. You know,
32:22
Speaker 1: I think sometimes I think a few things are are happening. Um, yes,
32:26
Speaker 1: I was. When I think of me as a girl
32:30
Speaker 1: in the sixties I lived, I was in Chicago, the
32:33
Speaker 1: subburbs of Chicago, so that I mean the race riots
32:36
Speaker 1: and all of the things happening was a lot of places,
32:40
Speaker 1: with Chicago in particular. When I think of all of that,
32:44
Speaker 1: I think I was being Um, you know, I didn't,
32:47
Speaker 1: I didn't know it. I wasn't aware what was happening.
32:49
Speaker 1: I was aware that I was so sad and I
32:51
Speaker 1: couldn't stand it, Like how is this happening? It's kind
32:55
Speaker 1: of right now, like right now, like last summer. How
32:58
Speaker 1: is this happening? How is this happening? So I would that,
33:01
Speaker 1: but I think I think it was it was all
33:03
Speaker 1: being implanted in me because all we had was television.
33:07
Speaker 1: We didn't have anything else. We didn't have phones, you know,
33:09
Speaker 1: I mean we had dial up phones, but we didn't
33:11
Speaker 1: have anything else. He had no other way. He had
33:12
Speaker 1: the news, he had the newspapers. But I remember what
33:16
Speaker 1: happened for me as I gravitated to Martin Luther King Jr.
33:19
Speaker 1: Like he became every time he would speak on television,
33:22
Speaker 1: I was riveted. I would listen to every single word.
33:24
Speaker 1: Or I gravitated towards um Thomas Martin, who was a
33:29
Speaker 1: Trappis monk in the in the Catholic tradition. He was
33:32
Speaker 1: my teacher, and I gravitated toward the Dalai Lama, you know,
33:37
Speaker 1: just watching what was happening over there. And so I
33:40
Speaker 1: think about those things and now as you know, someone
33:44
Speaker 1: who's been studying those people now, but also now there
33:46
Speaker 1: Mike John Lewis, like I feel like they're Mahatma Gandhia
33:50
Speaker 1: feel like they're my friends. If that makes so in
33:52
Speaker 1: this this place in my life, I feel like, wow,
33:57
Speaker 1: I know them, they're my friends. Now they're all gone, though,
34:01
Speaker 1: And when John Lewis died, I thought, oh my god.
34:04
Speaker 1: I took a deep breath because I had the unbelievable
34:07
Speaker 1: honor of meeting him the year before he died. And
34:11
Speaker 1: I took a deep breath, and I thought, this is it.
34:14
Speaker 1: When Brittany Packnett wrote what she wrote on that like,
34:17
Speaker 1: we got we got it now, we got this, um,
34:21
Speaker 1: and I remember thinking, oh, this is so hard, this
34:24
Speaker 1: is so heavy. And then the next breath, I thought, wait,
34:27
Speaker 1: even you've been training for this for your whole life.
34:30
Speaker 1: We've been training for this your whole life. Um. You
34:34
Speaker 1: were made for these times, bar and so is everyone
34:36
Speaker 1: else who's been in this realm of the sixties. So
34:40
Speaker 1: I think to answer your question, I think, if I
34:43
Speaker 1: look at the Buddhist way of thinking, and I'm not
34:44
Speaker 1: a Buddhist, but I just love because Buddhism is all
34:47
Speaker 1: puck of mind, and I just I love that. You know,
34:49
Speaker 1: the Buddhist way of thinking is we kind of went
34:51
Speaker 1: to sleep for a while, um. And I translate that
34:54
Speaker 1: it was not that we went to sleep. But that
34:56
Speaker 1: we you know, we hunkered down and made our money
34:58
Speaker 1: and raised our kids and did all the like like
35:01
Speaker 1: Hinduism calls the householder parts. We did all those things,
35:04
Speaker 1: and we just kind of put racial injustice and all that,
35:07
Speaker 1: you know, in the rearview mirror for a while so
35:09
Speaker 1: that we could do all the things that life was
35:11
Speaker 1: saying we were supposed to do. Society said, you gotta
35:13
Speaker 1: make money, you've gotta have a career, you've got to
35:15
Speaker 1: raise your family, You've got to do those things. And
35:17
Speaker 1: then when nuts done, which I think is happening, um,
35:22
Speaker 1: you know, we can rise back up I as a
35:24
Speaker 1: sixty four year old. But the most important part of
35:26
Speaker 1: that is all the people like me, raising the children,
35:29
Speaker 1: like Michelle, all those people. They're the ones doing I mean,
35:34
Speaker 1: I think I'm doing great work, but I I am
35:38
Speaker 1: so inspired by the thirties some things, in the twenties
35:41
Speaker 1: some things. And Michelle and I are teaching high school
35:44
Speaker 1: kids social justice and activism and community leadership and stuff
35:48
Speaker 1: in the university, and I look at these fourteen and
35:50
Speaker 1: fifteen and sixty old kids, I'm like, I'm I'm blown away.
35:55
Speaker 1: So I feel like we passed it along, even though
35:58
Speaker 1: we were in the streets of Arching after that sixties movement.
36:03
Speaker 1: But we didn't lose our spirit. We didn't lose that
36:06
Speaker 1: we were here. I know that I didn't lose the
36:08
Speaker 1: reason I was here because I don't think I would
36:11
Speaker 1: have come back to it if I lost it, or
36:13
Speaker 1: if it wasn't I was here. So when you say
36:15
Speaker 1: to everyone listening, you get the call answer it. And
36:19
Speaker 1: when I you asked me, how did I come to
36:23
Speaker 1: this when I couldn't get out of bed to go
36:25
Speaker 1: to work? I was twenty eight years old. I had
36:28
Speaker 1: never missed a day of work from the age of
36:30
Speaker 1: thirteen nine. Ever, I never called in sick ever, and
36:34
Speaker 1: I'm owning my own restaurants, and I never I never
36:37
Speaker 1: stayed home ever. So when I woke up that morning
36:40
Speaker 1: and literally said you can't get out of bed, it
36:45
Speaker 1: was a huge call. And I think we get those.
36:47
Speaker 1: But I love what you said, like pay attention, like notice,
36:51
Speaker 1: and if it's something different, remember we mean you can't
36:54
Speaker 1: get out of bed, You're never So I love that
36:58
Speaker 1: you said that. You know, just really start awareness is
37:00
Speaker 1: key what ticknoth Hans is one of my teachers, favorite teachers.
37:04
Speaker 1: He said, he says. Awareness is He's saying so beautifully.
37:10
Speaker 1: Awareness is like the sun, and when it shines on things,
37:14
Speaker 1: they are transformed. Mm hmm every time everything you wake up. Yeah,
37:25
Speaker 1: So I strive my whole life to just be aware.
37:29
Speaker 1: May not always make the right choice, definitely, don't always
37:32
Speaker 1: make the right choice, um, but I'm always aware. You
37:38
Speaker 1: know what I would love to speak to with you, Barb,
37:40
Speaker 1: and I have chills already and I haven't even got
37:42
Speaker 1: it out of my mouth. Okay, spirit, where are we going?
37:48
Speaker 1: Um m hm. So something that really that really is
38:00
Speaker 1: of striking about you is your authenticity is so palatable,
38:07
Speaker 1: like the way that it comes off of you. Your authenticity,
38:10
Speaker 1: your grace, your deep peace with you is so felt.
38:16
Speaker 1: And I think that's why I'm always so impressed by
38:20
Speaker 1: the work that you and Michelle do, and especially the
38:22
Speaker 1: work you do together both as individual spiritual teachers, but
38:26
Speaker 1: also as a mother and a daughter and seeing that
38:29
Speaker 1: pathway like that's so important for me as a mother
38:32
Speaker 1: of a son who you know, my biggest goal is
38:36
Speaker 1: to keep him as in remembrance of his wholeness as
38:39
Speaker 1: possible throughout his childhood, um and life and get the
38:44
Speaker 1: tools and the things, but you know you're you've sat
38:48
Speaker 1: here and the way that you share there is so
38:51
Speaker 1: much love. There's so much divine love that surrounds everything
38:56
Speaker 1: that you speak and that you say and do. But
38:59
Speaker 1: at the beginning of conversation, you also shared some very
39:05
Speaker 1: real and deep traumas that you have experienced that I
39:10
Speaker 1: think are so relatable for so many, including myself. I'm
39:14
Speaker 1: someone that has survived narcissistic abuse personally, and it was
39:20
Speaker 1: it's the work of your life to retrain yourself to
39:23
Speaker 1: love yourself. It's the work of your life, you know,
39:26
Speaker 1: and it's there is a point at least as I
39:30
Speaker 1: study it and have experienced it. It's like you know,
39:33
Speaker 1: you also there's always more, There's always a deepening, right,
39:39
Speaker 1: no matter how much time has passed since, and no
39:42
Speaker 1: matter how great that you're feeling it it's very deliberate,
39:46
Speaker 1: diligent work that is the active part of your daily life,
39:51
Speaker 1: loving yourself, supporting yourself after experiencing certain traumas um But
39:56
Speaker 1: the way in which that you still are able to
39:59
Speaker 1: share in the world with such authentic joy and such
40:03
Speaker 1: authentic self love, I think that is the piece that
40:06
Speaker 1: doesn't seem possible for most people. The idea that it
40:10
Speaker 1: won't be a performance, the idea that you can actually
40:13
Speaker 1: embody such deep love for yourself, um and such a
40:18
Speaker 1: neutral way of observing your past. That's the part that
40:22
Speaker 1: I think that, to me, is one of the greatest
40:25
Speaker 1: gifts in doing the work that can really propel people
40:29
Speaker 1: forward if they believe that's available to them. There there
40:33
Speaker 1: can come a point where you can look at your
40:35
Speaker 1: darkest moments and not have emotional charge around it and
40:39
Speaker 1: look at it as neutral, or look at it as
40:41
Speaker 1: you shared it of this happened to me. This happened
40:44
Speaker 1: to me, but that's not the whole story. This is
40:47
Speaker 1: the way that I funneled it, um and so any
40:50
Speaker 1: way that that you can speak to that in this moment,
40:53
Speaker 1: especially for the survivors listening, of being able to reclaim
40:57
Speaker 1: your authentic power and stand enjoy and it really be real.
41:03
Speaker 1: I appreciate you asking me this so much because I
41:06
Speaker 1: really want everyone listening out there that this is hard
41:10
Speaker 1: and that it was not easy for me. It it's
41:13
Speaker 1: been I mean, I'm sixty four years old and I
41:17
Speaker 1: am still always working on myself or looking at myself,
41:22
Speaker 1: and it took a lot of therapy. I joke all
41:25
Speaker 1: the time that, oh my gosh, I'm sixty four years old.
41:28
Speaker 1: I was probably you know, forty years in therapy on
41:31
Speaker 1: and off, and took a lot of therapy and a
41:34
Speaker 1: lot of hard work and studying and in my own
41:38
Speaker 1: capability of being able to study. And so what I
41:41
Speaker 1: want to say to everyone, it's not perfect love. Yes,
41:44
Speaker 1: I love myself, I trust myself, and I accept myself.
41:48
Speaker 1: Those are the three um like the three pillars I
41:52
Speaker 1: think that I look at but it's not perfect at all.
41:56
Speaker 1: Don't ever think that I'm sitting here I am. I
41:58
Speaker 1: am exactly who I um. You are seeing exactly who
42:01
Speaker 1: I am. But I am not perfect. And when I
42:04
Speaker 1: say that I'm a uh a mind expert, it doesn't
42:08
Speaker 1: mean that I only have joy and everything is good
42:11
Speaker 1: and I do something wrong and I bounced right back.
42:14
Speaker 1: You know, want people to think that, because I think
42:16
Speaker 1: that's the beauty of life. When I say, accepting myself
42:19
Speaker 1: and trusting myself are probably as as important, if not
42:23
Speaker 1: you know, up there with loving myself. Because I sometimes
42:27
Speaker 1: don't want to do the right thing. Mmm, I'm tired
42:31
Speaker 1: of doing the right thing. I've been working on this
42:33
Speaker 1: for you know, so, and that's okay. I don't get
42:36
Speaker 1: down on myself and say, oh my gosh, you're not authentic,
42:38
Speaker 1: you're not real. I think that people make that mistake.
42:42
Speaker 1: I think that we're trying to be perfect. And I
42:45
Speaker 1: obviously if Taipei all, I have all the signs, all
42:48
Speaker 1: the things. So being perfect was a huge thing for me.
42:53
Speaker 1: And I think, as i'm as I'm now a sixt
42:55
Speaker 1: or four ye old woman, you're never going to be perfect.
42:57
Speaker 1: So my love and acceptance and trust in myself up,
43:00
Speaker 1: it's not perfect, but I always come back to it,
43:03
Speaker 1: and it always it's my it's my um, it's who
43:06
Speaker 1: I am on the inside that I'm connected to. So
43:09
Speaker 1: I have the faith and the trust that I'll get
43:11
Speaker 1: back to it. So when I go off the deep end,
43:14
Speaker 1: I don't go off the deep end without without a
43:18
Speaker 1: parachute or without that tagging, you know, like that that
43:22
Speaker 1: little dinghy that's attached to the big yacht. You know,
43:25
Speaker 1: I'm the big yacht and everything, But sometimes I get
43:27
Speaker 1: out in that dinghy in that water and I don't
43:31
Speaker 1: know where I am, don't know what I'm doing, I
43:32
Speaker 1: don't know what's happening. Oh my gosh, Oh my gosh,
43:35
Speaker 1: and I will panic or I will get frantic, but
43:37
Speaker 1: I have the tether to who I am. And so
43:40
Speaker 1: I think that my recovery and the way that I've
43:43
Speaker 1: been living my life has been woven not only with
43:47
Speaker 1: the therapy loss of therapy, but the meditation of mindfulness
43:51
Speaker 1: piece has been key. I don't know I would be
43:54
Speaker 1: sitting here the way that I am today without it.
43:57
Speaker 1: So I try to help people see also have the
44:00
Speaker 1: you know, please seek therapy, seek whatever you can, whatever
44:03
Speaker 1: you can, and whatever you need to do. Because trauma
44:05
Speaker 1: is trauma and you talk about it beautifully. Trauma is
44:09
Speaker 1: is something that you live with for the rest of
44:10
Speaker 1: your life. It truly because trauma what I've noticed in
44:13
Speaker 1: myself and I like the mind is so important to me.
44:16
Speaker 1: Trauma confused gets me confused when I'm confused, or when
44:21
Speaker 1: I'm making a decision or a choice, or I'm feeling
44:25
Speaker 1: less than or I'm feeling like I don't know what
44:27
Speaker 1: I'm doing. If I sit for just even if I
44:30
Speaker 1: sit for five minutes, It'll come to me and I'll say,
44:33
Speaker 1: how are you confused? Confused? Well, what are you confused about?
44:38
Speaker 1: And I think it's my trauma because I was so
44:41
Speaker 1: severe with all of that and so being laughing about that,
44:44
Speaker 1: I said, oh, yes, oh you're here again. Okay, that's
44:49
Speaker 1: it's such a relief, like okay, okay, that's I have
44:52
Speaker 1: Gooseblum saying this to you because it's just experienced it. Wait,
44:56
Speaker 1: oh okay, so nothing's really wrong. There's not really anything
44:59
Speaker 1: wrong with me. I am the magnificent human being that
45:02
Speaker 1: every single one of us are, and I think that's
45:06
Speaker 1: that's what you feel in me, or that's what you see,
45:08
Speaker 1: is that I am very authentic and real about life
45:13
Speaker 1: is hard, and you will go through these times and
45:16
Speaker 1: you will feel lost and you will feel um at
45:20
Speaker 1: at the end of your rope. And there have been
45:22
Speaker 1: times in the past month or so I said, oh gosh,
45:26
Speaker 1: could this be different? Maybe this is that I'm going
45:29
Speaker 1: to go off the deep end, or maybe I can't
45:32
Speaker 1: survive this, or I mean, I we all that that's
45:36
Speaker 1: length that is and when when you do the hard thing,
45:41
Speaker 1: that will be in the back of my mind because
45:43
Speaker 1: I'm so connected to and I'm messed with my practice
45:47
Speaker 1: and what I know to be true. So I've got
45:50
Speaker 1: double track called you get a double track sometimes going
45:53
Speaker 1: even a meditation, you know, we get a double track going.
45:55
Speaker 1: We got all the thoughts going, and then we get
45:56
Speaker 1: the deep meditation and going. In life, I'll get a
45:59
Speaker 1: double track, Barbara, your whole You're completely got at all. Oh,
46:03
Speaker 1: I don't think. I think I finally met my match.
46:05
Speaker 1: Life is over. You know, you've got the crazy things
46:08
Speaker 1: that say so, I hope there was a long way
46:11
Speaker 1: of saying that. Just keep doing the work, one day
46:14
Speaker 1: at a time, knowing that you're doing everything you can,
46:17
Speaker 1: and you're peeling. I call it peeling the layers of
46:20
Speaker 1: an onion. M R. It's it's there's so many layers,
46:25
Speaker 1: and you're getting deeper and deeper. And so I experienced
46:28
Speaker 1: neither another little piece of my trauma a few weeks
46:31
Speaker 1: ago in this little girl that um didn't feel safe.
46:37
Speaker 1: It was actually my little girl and she I could
46:39
Speaker 1: just I could feel that, Like, where did that come from?
46:42
Speaker 1: I thought? I I thought, I thought I protected you
46:45
Speaker 1: and and and healed you decades ago. Yeah, what do
46:49
Speaker 1: you mean? What do you mean now? What's happening now?
46:52
Speaker 1: Let me just be patient and loving and open and
46:54
Speaker 1: receptive and curious all the words that will help you
46:59
Speaker 1: to feel that everything is okay all the time, even
47:02
Speaker 1: if it's your your worst, like all as well. That's
47:05
Speaker 1: my favorite affirmation. I take a few deep breaths, all
47:09
Speaker 1: as well, all is well in this moment, and then
47:12
Speaker 1: tik not on one of my favorite teachers. I went
47:15
Speaker 1: on some silent retreats with him for a decade, for years,
47:19
Speaker 1: and we'd walk for hours in silence. The whole retreat
47:23
Speaker 1: was in silence, and he would only instructions. He would
47:25
Speaker 1: say me, where your feet are, Where your feet are?
47:30
Speaker 1: So when I met my worst, I'll say, all is well,
47:34
Speaker 1: urb you are, your feet be right here? What what's
47:36
Speaker 1: happening for you? Right here? And I come right back.
47:40
Speaker 1: That's the ground things that you're you're studying yourself for
47:43
Speaker 1: your son. I think it's the same you're you're a
47:46
Speaker 1: practice and who you are as a human beings. Everything
47:51
Speaker 1: for him, it was everything. From Michelle, she didn't and
47:54
Speaker 1: she thought it was nuts. I put a little sign
47:56
Speaker 1: outside the door, a little friend of mine, crouteate, a
47:58
Speaker 1: little pillow that said about inside. I had several those
48:03
Speaker 1: you know, do not disturb when I go in through
48:05
Speaker 1: their meditated stuff, and she thought it's weird. But she
48:08
Speaker 1: loved it because she could see I could weather the
48:11
Speaker 1: storms of life and still stay sandy. Wow. Wow, Wow.
48:18
Speaker 1: People know it's not perfect love. It's not perfect love.
48:22
Speaker 1: There's no such thing as that, and society it's a
48:25
Speaker 1: very imperfect love. That's really beautiful. Mm hmm. Thank you
48:31
Speaker 1: for unpacking that so fully, and you know the thing
48:36
Speaker 1: that came up for me as you were sharing. And
48:39
Speaker 1: if this is useful for anyone listening, I think a
48:43
Speaker 1: lot of people approach or don't approach meditation and mindfulness
48:48
Speaker 1: because they might be saying for those who have been
48:52
Speaker 1: on the experiencing end of trauma, big to your little tea,
48:56
Speaker 1: whatever kind of trauma, we all carry something, you think,
49:00
Speaker 1: but there's no way that that could ever make me
49:02
Speaker 1: not think about this right and so to that I
49:06
Speaker 1: want to offer when we talk about in this conversation,
49:12
Speaker 1: you can heal, and then there's always opportunity to go
49:15
Speaker 1: deeper in that healing, even if it shows itself decades later,
49:18
Speaker 1: it's because at that moment, what you've done served you
49:22
Speaker 1: so fully, and at that moment, now there's more, there's
49:25
Speaker 1: a little more available, or there's a way to refine,
49:28
Speaker 1: or there's a way to just shine a little more
49:29
Speaker 1: light in that area, you know, um as we're coming
49:33
Speaker 1: to know as the studies of trauma expand for the
49:36
Speaker 1: very first time. You know, a lot of it is
49:39
Speaker 1: in ourselves, and so it is a daily diligent practice
49:43
Speaker 1: to be with yourself to heal yourself. And when I
49:46
Speaker 1: think about the abuse in my life, you know, I
49:51
Speaker 1: I think about it several times a week. It enters
49:54
Speaker 1: my field of consciousness regularly, maybe even daily, but there's
49:58
Speaker 1: not charge for it in this moment with me, and
50:01
Speaker 1: so I think about it because it happened, because it exists.
50:06
Speaker 1: But in comparison too many years ago, in comparison even
50:10
Speaker 1: to you know, the last couple of years, it's not
50:13
Speaker 1: always felt as this gaping, using wound. Sometimes it's just
50:18
Speaker 1: the scar that is healed beautifully. And I'm just aware
50:22
Speaker 1: of it. I'm aware that that has happened in my life,
50:25
Speaker 1: but I'm not living in that feeling right now. I
50:28
Speaker 1: can just observe it, and then I can let myself
50:30
Speaker 1: know like, yeah, that popped up because it happened, and
50:33
Speaker 1: now you can release the thought if you choose to. Yeah,
50:38
Speaker 1: I'm so beautiful sid to me, And I think it's
50:41
Speaker 1: not you know it does you think about it? And
50:43
Speaker 1: I love that the idea that you know, your life
50:48
Speaker 1: goes where you place your attention, and so the mind
50:52
Speaker 1: is always trying to get our attention so to'll throw
50:54
Speaker 1: everything at us. So I believe that the same as you,
50:57
Speaker 1: that those thoughts and those ideas come up regularly. Um,
51:02
Speaker 1: I might stand in front of a mirror and say
51:04
Speaker 1: to myself, woll you look fat? Maybe you should I
51:06
Speaker 1: think I put this in my book, Maybe you should
51:08
Speaker 1: cancel going out with your friends because you don't look
51:10
Speaker 1: good enough. You know when I share that with you,
51:12
Speaker 1: that are like, but you've been in recovery for all
51:14
Speaker 1: this long. I said, yeah, but I have trauma from
51:17
Speaker 1: all of that bulimia all those years. And so it
51:19
Speaker 1: doesn't mean that it's not going to rear its head,
51:22
Speaker 1: or it's not going to try to get my attention,
51:24
Speaker 1: or it's not going to as you said, it's in
51:26
Speaker 1: the cells. And so we have a beautiful choice. And
51:30
Speaker 1: I think that's the that's the whole reason I think
51:32
Speaker 1: for training your mind to be a friend and an
51:36
Speaker 1: ally and using practices and using tools and having all
51:39
Speaker 1: those things, Because if I didn't have all that that
51:42
Speaker 1: thought would start to take root in my mind because
51:45
Speaker 1: I give it food. I would say, well, where do
51:47
Speaker 1: you think I'm Where do you think I'm fat? Was
51:49
Speaker 1: it because the pants look a little bit tight? Or
51:52
Speaker 1: maybe about the wrong I mean, I would have a
51:54
Speaker 1: whole conversation in the past about it, and today I'll
51:57
Speaker 1: say it to myself and I'll look at myself. I'll
52:00
Speaker 1: start to laugh most of the time because I'll say, well,
52:03
Speaker 1: that's just not true. You you know, you've come to
52:05
Speaker 1: visit me again, or that thought is not true. I mean,
52:08
Speaker 1: that's what I love about the the age that we're
52:11
Speaker 1: living in now, with all the research and the science
52:13
Speaker 1: that you mentioned studying humanity. There's so much science behind
52:17
Speaker 1: now that we think, you know, seventy thousand thoughts a day,
52:21
Speaker 1: and eighty five those are repetitive, and of those that
52:25
Speaker 1: are repetitive, most of them are negative. So no wonder
52:28
Speaker 1: we're like a mess all the time makes sense. So
52:31
Speaker 1: that makes me feel better, like, Okay, no, I get it.
52:35
Speaker 1: We're all like this because the mind is unruly, and
52:38
Speaker 1: no one ever taught us, No one ever taught us
52:41
Speaker 1: that you actually have a choice and what you're going
52:44
Speaker 1: to pay attention to and think you have a choice.
52:46
Speaker 1: Book comes in the head, like you just said, but
52:49
Speaker 1: you have a choice as to what you're going to
52:51
Speaker 1: pay attention to and what thoughts you're going to believe.
52:54
Speaker 1: And the more you keep believing the truthful, helpful, stay us,
53:00
Speaker 1: the more you start to recognize that the other thoughts
53:03
Speaker 1: not only are not real, they don't serve you. They
53:06
Speaker 1: bring you down. And it's really your responsibility start honoring
53:11
Speaker 1: yourself and not leaving them. It's it's it's just your
53:15
Speaker 1: practice to start paying attention to what isn't true and
53:18
Speaker 1: what isn't helping you. And I think that idea of
53:23
Speaker 1: we're always going to have little triggers, Yeah, and just
53:27
Speaker 1: being aware awareness. Awareness is like the sun when it
53:30
Speaker 1: shines on things, it's transformed. If you can just be
53:32
Speaker 1: aware of the minute you are aware of you're here again.
53:36
Speaker 1: I dealt with you many many times in the past
53:39
Speaker 1: sixty years. Um, you know, goodbye? You know with this
53:45
Speaker 1: is this two shall pass? Or life as well in
53:48
Speaker 1: this moment or be where my yes one that I
53:53
Speaker 1: love to use for me is it all serves purpose.
53:56
Speaker 1: Everything serves purpose, you know, And I like to identify
54:00
Speaker 1: way is that I was positively informed um by by
54:04
Speaker 1: different experiences. That is so good. I say to everyone
54:09
Speaker 1: listening to if Debby and I can do it, you
54:12
Speaker 1: can do it. But we're sharing the deepest things. Everyone
54:18
Speaker 1: can and it's not easy. But you can, little by
54:22
Speaker 1: little by little, like doing one thing, one baby thing
54:25
Speaker 1: every day in the twenty or period that you could do.
54:29
Speaker 1: Maybe it's read a chapter in the book. Maybe it's
54:32
Speaker 1: pick an affirmation that you'll use every time the mind
54:34
Speaker 1: tells you a lie, every time the mind beats you up.
54:37
Speaker 1: You stop on all the thoughts you're having in the mind, like, Okay,
54:40
Speaker 1: what's real and what isn't. Just become a scientist of
54:43
Speaker 1: the mind all day long. Well what you just said
54:45
Speaker 1: that isn't real? Well, no, it's not real. And then
54:48
Speaker 1: you because the minute you say it's not real, or
54:50
Speaker 1: the minute you challenge it, you took it slower, you
54:53
Speaker 1: took it Centergy. It goes like that like that that
54:56
Speaker 1: the second you self inquiry, the second you you're feeling
55:01
Speaker 1: a question, you've regained your power. Yeah, exactly, do that
55:07
Speaker 1: all day long. It's not like you're gaining your power
55:09
Speaker 1: for the rest of the day. You can you can,
55:13
Speaker 1: and it does happen a lot, but it may not
55:16
Speaker 1: and it doesn't matter. It's all the same. It's all
55:18
Speaker 1: it's all as you said, it's all purpose, it's all practice,
55:20
Speaker 1: it's all the grand scheme of life. And it's never
55:24
Speaker 1: the same from moment to moment to moment, which we
55:27
Speaker 1: know from this pandemic. It's taught us amazing thing. It
55:31
Speaker 1: has never the same from moment to moment. We get
55:36
Speaker 1: into a groove and all okay, the gifts of the
55:41
Speaker 1: pandemic of restructuring time for ourselves has been a meant
55:48
Speaker 1: such a master class and detachment unless we sink control.
55:53
Speaker 1: And I think what I love, what I always look
55:55
Speaker 1: at for people, I always a master class of detachment
55:59
Speaker 1: and awareness and understanding that we literally don't have any
56:03
Speaker 1: control that we ever thought we did. Now we now
56:06
Speaker 1: we really know we don't. But it's also a master
56:08
Speaker 1: class and pain, yes, and suffering, and up and and
56:14
Speaker 1: alone being alone and lonely and fearful, and um, I
56:21
Speaker 1: think the duality I've been studied. I've been thinking about
56:24
Speaker 1: duality a lot in my life that I've been going
56:28
Speaker 1: to and I thought, we live in a dualistic world,
56:31
Speaker 1: and we live in You know, there's the good. There's
56:33
Speaker 1: always the good and bad. There's always the suffering and
56:37
Speaker 1: the joy, and so understanding the suffering and moving ourselves
56:41
Speaker 1: through it, our emotions and getting the emotions out and
56:43
Speaker 1: feeling the feelings, and once you want to name the
56:46
Speaker 1: feelings of it's gone, and then you do the right
56:50
Speaker 1: for some is the work of what the pain is underneath.
56:53
Speaker 1: And then we bring our attention to the joy or
56:55
Speaker 1: what we're saying the blessings or with your son or I.
57:00
Speaker 1: I live next door to an elderly woman who has
57:03
Speaker 1: captives in her front yard, and I live in South Florida.
57:05
Speaker 1: I didn't even know there was such a thing as
57:06
Speaker 1: a captus in South Florida because it's wet here. Become
57:10
Speaker 1: obsessed with her cactus flower and yes, she's mom. I
57:16
Speaker 1: can't even talk to you anymore about your captus because
57:19
Speaker 1: I'm so curious about how they flowered certain times. And
57:22
Speaker 1: I thought I knew there. I thought I knew what
57:25
Speaker 1: these cactus did last pandemically, we're all last beginning of this.
57:30
Speaker 1: I thought I got it down. The cactus does listen,
57:32
Speaker 1: It does listen. The rooms here and this this summer,
57:36
Speaker 1: this spring. This, this section of the pandemic totally different.
57:40
Speaker 1: I remember thinking, Wow, Barb, you don't have it. This
57:43
Speaker 1: is a whole new thing. This is so cool. I
57:46
Speaker 1: think being curious and being white and gentle with yourself
57:48
Speaker 1: helps a lot. And it's it's not easy, but we
57:51
Speaker 1: can do it. We can just focus our attention there.
57:54
Speaker 1: We can just trust that you can do it. Yeah,
57:59
Speaker 1: one little we can do it. We can do it.
58:02
Speaker 1: You can do it. Thank God for everybody that is
58:07
Speaker 1: ready to get more of all things Barbed. Go to
58:11
Speaker 1: the instagram Peaceful Mind, Peaceful Life. You can also connect
58:14
Speaker 1: to her personal instagram on there. There are so many
58:17
Speaker 1: powerful videos with deep teaching, so many recentering quotes, so
58:22
Speaker 1: many things to get you into alignment throughout your day.
58:25
Speaker 1: And also right now, Barb has a special promotion. For
58:30
Speaker 1: the very first time, she is offering a small intimate
58:33
Speaker 1: group of mindfulness coach coaching program later this year. It's
58:37
Speaker 1: only going to be limited to eight people and topics
58:41
Speaker 1: will include setting healthy boundaries, managing emotional triggers, coping with
58:45
Speaker 1: anxiety and overwhelmed, finding forgiveness and the often elusive closure
58:53
Speaker 1: are all going to be some of the curriculum that
58:56
Speaker 1: you can really equip your life with. So for anyone
58:59
Speaker 1: listening that is interested, it's only limited to eat people.
59:02
Speaker 1: So if you're called to this move quick of the
59:05
Speaker 1: program or upcoming retreats are going to be in two
59:07
Speaker 1: So when you go to Peaceful Mind, Peaceful life dot org,
59:11
Speaker 1: sign up for the newsletter and get more information there.
59:13
Speaker 1: So peaceful Mind, peaceful life dot org and on I. G.
59:17
Speaker 1: Barb's book is also available to practice simple tools for
59:21
Speaker 1: managing stress, finding inner peace, and uncovering happiness. Thank you
59:25
Speaker 1: so much for joining us far. This was such a joy.
59:29
Speaker 1: And and I just love you, and I love you,
59:32
Speaker 1: and I love all of you listening. Um, just just
59:34
Speaker 1: know that you matter and you you make a difference
59:38
Speaker 1: in this world every single day that you just open
59:40
Speaker 1: your eyes. Just open your eyes in the morning before
59:43
Speaker 1: you get out of bed, close them again. You know,
59:46
Speaker 1: just think of one thing you're grateful for, and just
59:47
Speaker 1: really know that you make a difference just by being alive.
59:51
Speaker 1: And I'm so grateful to know you, deVie, you have
59:54
Speaker 1: You've made such a huge impact in my life. Huge.
59:57
Speaker 1: I can't and Michelle and I love you to the
1:00:00
Speaker 1: mooning back. Yeah, that's our love. Story back. That's our
1:00:05
Speaker 1: love story to all the realms and back. I love
1:00:09
Speaker 1: all of you. I love all of you. I think
1:00:11
Speaker 1: that's what I think, That's what was how I was
1:00:14
Speaker 1: drawn to you, Debbie. Is Your love for humanity is
1:00:20
Speaker 1: um overwhelming. It's over yeah. I mean it flows so
1:00:24
Speaker 1: freely and so graciously and so lovingly, and I feel
1:00:28
Speaker 1: like we connect on that that human level of love
1:00:33
Speaker 1: and care and compassion and and just joy for all
1:00:36
Speaker 1: the beings out there. So we love you so much.
1:00:40
Speaker 1: As you're listening to this. M hmm, Barbed Schmidt, ladies
1:00:45
Speaker 1: and gentlemen, I mean, don't we just all feel so
1:00:49
Speaker 1: much deeper inside of ourselves from being in this moment together.
1:00:54
Speaker 1: Thank you, Barbed so much. I'm so grateful for your time.
1:00:57
Speaker 1: I'm grateful for your life. I'm grateful for your wisdom,
1:01:00
Speaker 1: so grateful for Michelle. Thank you everyone for listening. Please
1:01:06
Speaker 1: go head to their Instagram page. That is your soul
1:01:08
Speaker 1: work for the day. I want you to screenshot five
1:01:11
Speaker 1: different posts and send them to someone who needs it
1:01:14
Speaker 1: and also save it in your phone for yourself, and
1:01:17
Speaker 1: maybe those can be your meditation prompts. Go as you full,
1:01:21
Speaker 1: Let explore go gently when needed, but keep moving forward.
1:01:26
Speaker 1: I love you, Thank you, not must day. Everyone, Hey,
1:01:30
Speaker 1: find me on social Let's connect at Debbie Brown. That's
1:01:34
Speaker 1: Twitter and Instagram, or go to my website Debbie Brown
1:01:37
Speaker 1: dot com. And if you're listening to the show on
1:01:40
Speaker 1: Apple Podcasts, please please please don't forget to rate, review
1:01:46
Speaker 1: and subscribe and send this episode to a friend. Dropping
1:01:51
Speaker 1: Jim's is the production of I Heart Radio and the
1:01:53
Speaker 1: Black Effect Network. It's produced by Jack Please and me
1:01:57
Speaker 1: Debbie Brown. For more podcast from My heart Radio, visit
1:02:00
Speaker 1: the I heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you
1:02:04
Speaker 1: listen to your favorite shows. H m hm